{"id":300207,"date":"2018-04-20T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-04-20T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/possessions-entertainment-and-friends\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:23","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:23","slug":"possessions-entertainment-and-friends","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/possessions-entertainment-and-friends\/","title":{"rendered":"Possessions, Entertainment and Friends"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jen Wilkin explains how our children&#8217;s possessions, entertainment, friends-entire lifestyle-should display Christ in sharp contrast to the unbelieving world around them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-04-20.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:27:36","filesize":"25.27M","filesize_raw":"26492274","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[10350,2806],"tags":[4356,4317,4336,4353],"podcast_series":[7209],"cwp_profile":[3337],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300207","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-digital-and-media-choices","category-spiritual-development","tag-being-different-from-the-world","tag-biblical-worldview","tag-christian-worldview","tag-raising-children","podcast_series-raising-alien-children","cwp_profile-jen-wilkin","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300207\/possessions-entertainment-and-friends","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300207\/possessions-entertainment-and-friends","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"alwLSFxcMz\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/possessions-entertainment-and-friends\/\">Possessions, Entertainment and Friends<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/possessions-entertainment-and-friends\/embed\/#?secret=alwLSFxcMz\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Possessions, Entertainment and Friends&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"alwLSFxcMz\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-04-20.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-04-20.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Every parent wants to make sure his or her child is well cared for \/ well taken care of. Jen Wilkin says, \u201cWe need to understand that what is best for them is that they learn that enough is often enough.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen:<\/strong> Enough is a concept that we are losing in our culture as well. We have parents who\u2014because of guilt of not being around the kids enough or whatever it is\u2014they begin to sort of purchase their approval by giving them whatever they want whenever they want it. Why?\u2014because we think we are going to satisfy the child\u2014but studies show that, when you give a child what they want exactly when they want it, that you don\u2019t create a child who is satisfied\u2014you create a child who is insatiable \/ who is <em>never<\/em> satisfied. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, April 20<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019ve got some interesting thoughts for you today, like the idea that sometimes depriving your children of what they want may be what\u2019s actually best for them, even if they make it hard for you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll hear more from Jen Wilkin about that today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Friday edition. As we raise our kids today, we want them to fit into the culture; but there\u2019s a difference between fitting in and being conformed to a culture; isn\u2019t there? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s right, Bob. They can\u2019t adopt the values of the culture; so you have to equip your children to know how to think, how to act, how to behave, and how to train their hearts so that, when they\u2019re facing circumstances that they hadn\u2019t planned on, they\u2019ll know what to do; because their heart has been trained to obey God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is something we\u2019ve been doing a lot of thinking about this year, because we are hoping to launch, in 2018, a movement. We\u2019ve talked about parenting for years\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014you helped develop a parenting conference back in the \u201890s. We\u2019ve talked about it often, here, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; but we\u2019re starting to put together some resources that we think can have a powerful impact in the lives of moms and dads and in the lives of the next generation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We want to equip one million parents, in the next three years, with a practical, biblical game plan for <em>each<\/em> of their children\u2014to help you anticipate what your child is going to face, and to know how to respond according to the Scriptures, and then train your children how to think, which what we\u2019re talking about today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; we\u2019ve got a movie coming out May 1<sup>st<\/sup> and 3<sup>rd<\/sup> called <em>Like Arrows<\/em>. We\u2019re also releasing, the first of May, a new video series called <em>FamilyLife\u2019s<\/em> <em>Art of Parenting<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup>, eight sessions for small groups to go through together. It\u2019s available for pre-order now at substantial discount, by the way, if you order before May 1<sup>st<\/sup>. There is also going to be an online component\u2014there\u2019s going to be a free course, online, that couples can go through together if they\u2019d like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, this fall, you and Barbara are releasing a book called <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is all with some purposefulness and intentionality so that moms and dads, who are raising the next generation, can be intentional and strategic about what they are doing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And we\u2019re going to hear today from a mom, who is in the process of raising her children. Jen Wilkin joins us as she gave a message at the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission\u2019s Parenting Conference, back last August. Bob, she\u2019s on target as she talks about parents equipping your kids to know how to be aliens in this world\u2014how to think, how to behave, and how to go with an offensive game plan. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes\u2014how to fit in without being conformed by the culture. We\u2019ve already heard her this week talk about how this way of thinking ought to affect your children\u2019s activities and how it ought to affect their speech. We pick up today as she is dealing with issue number three. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen:<\/strong> Number three, possessions: \u201cThe alien child will not own what other children own; or more precisely, the alien child will not own what other children own when they own it.\u201d In our homes, we should be cultivating a sense of delayed gratification. Why?\u2014because we are a people of delayed gratification \/ we await something better. This, to me, is probably the most potentially devastating element of what technology seems to be doing to our children\u2019s brains. They are losing their capacity to wait; and God help us, as parents. We are often handing them the means to do it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we raise children, who do not know how to wait, we stand very little chance of being able to help them become disciples who know how to wait for the Lord, who know how to be patient with others in their suffering or in their sin. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is a basic skill of being a Christ-follower, so we should look for ways to teach delayed gratification. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI will tell you straight up\u2014when I heard that Amazon was developing drones so that they could just drop my package on the front porch as soon as I thought I wanted something, I was like: \u201cI am in! Can we get the Girl Scouts hooked up with that?\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014\u201cbecause I want those cookies, and I want them yesterday.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou think about that\u2014a big piece of that is modeling. One of the things I had to tell myself, as a young mom\u2014because I had to take all four kids to the store with me\u2014and one of my favorite things was how people would stop me and say, \u201cAre they all yours?\u201d [Laughter] It was all I could do to not say: \u201cWho picks up extra toddlers to go to this\u2014who?\u2014of course, they\u2019re all mine! Don\u2019t you think, if I had any other option: \u2018Hey, kids, let\u2019s go to the store. Let\u2019s bring some friends along.\u2019\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSometimes, my time in Target was a little frantic; right? You\u2019re just like randomly grabbing things fast\u2014\u201cYou got to get me out of here before something explodes\u201d; right? What I began to realize was that I needed to stop. I needed to pick things up and look at them, and you know what I needed to do?\u2014put them back. My children needed a visual way to learn that just because I might want it doesn\u2019t mean that I get it right then. We thought about ways that we could show them: \u201cHey, we want this,\u201d\u2014and in many cases, we have the money for it\u2014it\u2019s not a \u201cNo\u201d; it\u2019s a \u201cNot now.\u201d That\u2019s a good concept for our children to understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat means that we will raise children who view possessions in a different light. They will value last year\u2019s possession and not always want this year\u2019s. They will understand the difference between \u201cmore\u201d and \u201cless\u201d and \u201cenough.\u201d Enough is a concept that we are losing in our culture as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have parents who\u2014because of guilt of not being around the kids enough or whatever it is\u2014they begin to sort of purchase their approval by giving them whatever they want whenever they want it. Why?\u2014because they think that we are going to satisfy the child\u2014but studies show that, when you give a child what they want exactly when they want it, you don\u2019t create a child who is satisfied\u2014you create a child who is insatiable \/ who is <em>never<\/em> satisfied. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talk to our children about needs versus wants. Here\u2019s the thing\u2014I\u2019m not saying that you never give your child the nice thing\u2014you know how they\u2019ll come and they\u2019ll be like, \u201cI just really want this.\u201d You\u2019re like, \u201cThat\u2019s the dumbest thing,\u201d\u2014in your head, you\u2019re like, \u201cThat is such a dumb thing to want\u201d; but they <em>really<\/em> want it\u2014like it\u2019s a pair of tennis shoes that cost 450 bucks. You\u2019re like, \u201cOkay; at Target, I can buy you tennis for $32.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat do you do? You meet them halfway, because they are going to learn a great lesson if they shell out the difference between what you\u2019re willing to pay and what the item costs. They will either gain enjoyment from the item that is equivalent to what they paid for, and they will learn a lesson about how to spend money that way\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014or they will wear the brand-new tennis shoes, that are white, in a giant mud puddle and realize that probably they weren\u2019t the best use of their money; but they get to learn something about stewardship themselves. You can partner with them and have them take some responsibility over their possessions by asking them to contribute once they have money in their little bank accounts. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother thing for us that was kind of critical was\u2014we delayed cell phone usage as long as we possibly could. I know it\u2019s not as easy to do that as it was when my kids were coming up, but we allowed them to have a cell phone in the eighth grade. We bought them one of those go-phones, and they had to pay for it. It was <em>awesome<\/em>\u2014they would get sucked into someone\u2019s group text. They are getting charged 15 cents every time some kid sends a text, and they were <em>dying<\/em>. What it did\u2014is it taught them to use the phone for needful communication only because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014P.S.: That\u2019s what phones are for! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, later, when they hit high school, we did give them a smartphone before they left for college. You know why?\u2014I don\u2019t want you going to college and getting a smartphone for the first time when you\u2019re not living under my roof. So, we gave them opportunities, as they were appropriate. My kids would say: \u201cWell, I need a phone. How am I going to call you if I\u2019m in trouble?\u201d I\u2019m like: \u201cEvery single one of your friends has a phone. I am not worried that you can reach me if you need to.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother thing that I saw a lot of\u2014that I was even aware of in myself\u2014was that, once my child had a phone, I was more likely to say, \u201cYes,\u201d to a situation I was not that comfortable with under the assumption: \u201cWell, they can just call me if anything goes wrong.\u201d The phone can give us a false sense of security. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, we weigh possessions differently than other people do. We may say, \u201cYes\u201d; we may say, \u201cNo\u201d; we may say, \u201cNot now\u201d; we may ask them to partner, when they are able, in the expense; but we don\u2019t always have to have the newest thing, and we don\u2019t have to have a ton of it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talk about giving as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFourth: \u201cAn alien child will not watch, read, or listen to what other children watch, read, or listen to. An alien child will view entertainment differently.\u201d If you are waiting for me to give you a list of what your kid can watch and can\u2019t watch, you are going to be sorely disappointed; because I am not a fool, and it\u2019s your job. It\u2019s your job to discern what it is that your children should be watching\u2014more importantly, how much they should be watching. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere is the thing that I need you to understand. Anytime we sit down with entertainment, we are making a choice between doing that and doing something else. I would say what other speakers have said\u2014that long car trips were a time when most of our best conversations happened. We have an 11-hour ride out to my parents\u2019 home in Santa Fe. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would tell the children: \u201cYou can have a movie in the morning and a movie in the afternoon on this trip.\u201d They were like, \u201cOkay; that\u2019s cool.\u201d Everybody else is basically watching shows the <em>whole<\/em> trip when they go somewhere\u2014but whatever. Then, they would choose <em>The Sound of Music<\/em> because it\u2019s three-and-a-half hours long. [Laughter] But we need to understand that when you\u2019re\u2014that\u2019s an example of, when you\u2019re all in the same place together, that is an opportunity to train or just to have a conversation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOftentimes, we are trading training for entertaining. If you are waiting for a table at a restaurant, and you hand your child the phone instead of sitting there and seeing if a conversation bubbles up, you have just chosen entertaining over training. It doesn\u2019t mean that you never do that; right? You might do it sometimes; but if that\u2019s what characterizes you\u2014is to medicate waiting with entertaining versus training\u2014you might end up raising a child who, anytime they are faced with waiting, finds a way to medicate it. The medications get scarier the older we get. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, training versus entertaining\u2014long car trips are not a time for everyone to just zone out in their own little entertainment world. Part of the time, they are for sure; right?\u2014like when everybody is totally freaking out. But if you think, \u201cI can\u2019t survive a long car trip unless my kids are plugged in somewhere,\u201d I\u2019d ask you to reevaluate that you are trading a precious time when you do that\u2014so, training versus entertaining. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother thing that I\u2019ve noticed in our society is that entertaining is no longer a shared value. In other words, we go on a car trip\u2014Jimmy\u2019s got music on his phone, and Susie\u2019s got her music on her phone or her screen in front of her. Mom\u2019s listening to something, and dad\u2019s listening to something else. Even when we are at home, a lot of times this is what happens; right?\u2014like someone is in one room watching something \/ someone is in another room watching something. Entertainment is ceasing to be a shared value\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it is seen as an individual thing that we do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat if we didn\u2019t do that?\u2014like what if we all sat down together? What if, when you were in the car, you all listened to the same music? What if, when you watch the movie, everybody watched the <em>same<\/em> movie?\u2014and you reinforced that idea that: \u201cWe are walking by the way <em>together<\/em>. This is something we are doing together.\u201d It wasn\u2019t just about enjoying the entertainment; it was about enjoying <em>our enjoyment<\/em> of the entertainment <em>together<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe live in houses that are designed to push us apart many times\u2014everybody has their own room; everybody has their own TV; everybody has their own everything. One of the great gifts of having all of these kids that came at the same time was that we couldn\u2019t move to a house big enough fast enough, and we were all on top of each other. It was a <em>gift<\/em> from the Lord\u2014it was gift from the Lord. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, my son did go off to college and have to tell his friends who KC and the Sunshine Band were because none of them had ever heard of it. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe were like, \u201cSorry; not sorry,\u201d because we all shared the same musical tastes. It was a great way for us to build an identity, as a family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFifth, friends: \u201cAn alien child will not invest in the same kinds of relationships that other children do.\u201d We train our children to recognize character. We train them to flee from drama and disorder. The best way to train your child to flee from drama and disorder in relationships is to not have them in your home. We had a rule that no one gets to press the drama button in our house. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve got two girls; I\u2019ve got two boys. I would love to tell you that the girls were where the drama came from, but that is actually not true. It does not seem to be a gender-specific thing. Boy drama looks more like WWE [World Wrestling Entertainment]. Girl drama looks more like flinging a hairbrush at somebody across the bathroom. It\u2019s the same motive; right? So, we said: \u201cNo one gets to push the drama button. You can come tell me what\u2019s wrong, but you cannot flip out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cIf you flip out, you can come back when you\u2019re done flipping out. Then, we will talk about it. No one gets to push the drama button.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, you send children into their schoolroom relationships, and they begin to realize that a lot of people don\u2019t have that rule. They gravitate toward the children who have more self-control around their emotions. They begin to recognize character and to flee from drama and disorder. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is a really an important piece\u2014work to make the home their primary place of belonging, and how is the best way to accomplish this? We ask our children to be friends with one another\u2014siblings can be friends. This is such an important thing to me. Sibling rivalry is <em>accepted<\/em> by us as the way that the home should function. I\u2019m telling you that you may not be able to neutralize it, but you must not normalize it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know why?\u2014because we are part of the family of God, where we are to view ourselves as brothers and sisters partnering in kingdom work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere are 54 \u201cone another\u2019s\u201d in the New Testament that we cannot hope to fulfill if we have adversarial relationships with one another. Is it any wonder that there is fractiousness among the brothers and sisters in the church when so many of our homes have said that fractiousness between brothers and sisters is all we can hope for? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy husband was best friends with his sister. Her senior year, he attended a dance as her <em>date<\/em>. They have pictures of them, in high school, holding hands at Disney World\u2014in high school! [Laughter] It\u2019s okay to say it makes you uncomfortable. [Laughter] My brothers locked me in the closet, so I had no frame of reference for this. If I hadn\u2019t seen it in Jeff\u2019s family, I couldn\u2019t have hoped for it; but I\u2019m here to tell you it\u2019s a thing, and it\u2019s the <em>best<\/em> thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>So, when our kids were fighting with one another, do you know what we did? We said: \u201cGuess who\u2019s not going over to anybody else\u2019s house?\u2014you guys\u2014because until you can get along with each other, you don\u2019t need to go anywhere else; because these are your best friends.\u201d I know they were thinking in their heads: \u201cThat is not my best friend. I would murder this person if you left the room right now.\u201d [Laughter] But we said it again and again: \u201cThis is your best friend,\u201d \u201cThis is your best friend,\u201d \u201cThis is your best friend.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know why?\u2014Jeff had the funniest conversation with the kids one night. He was like, \u201cHey, do you know who my best friend was in third grade?\u201d They are like, \u201cNo.\u201d He goes: \u201cNeither do I. I\u2019ve got no idea where that guy is, and neither will you. [Laughter] You know who you are always going to be with? These people\u2014these four people in this room\u2014the four of you are going to take care, Lord willing, of Mom and Dad as we age. You will have these people forever\u2014for the whole length of your life on this earth. Don\u2019t you want them to be your best friends?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey <em>are<\/em> each other\u2019s best\u2014like I can\u2019t even believe it <em>worked<\/em>. I\u2019m so faithless! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe three that are down at Texas A&amp;M\u2014the three that are down there go to family dinner <em>together<\/em> and FaceTime with the one who is still at home\u2014and sit there and just laugh their heads off. It is the sweetest thing, and I did not think it was possible. I\u2019m standing here to repent and to tell you that it is. Expect it and work toward it with faithfulness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat\u2019s the bottom line? You probably see this coming. The only reliable way to raise an alien child is to be an alien parent. You, yourself, must drive to know, love, and serve God with everything that you have. More important than right relationship with your child is right relationship with your heavenly Father. It is your only hope of right relationship with your child, because think about this\u2014before your child ever learns to read a Bible, they will read you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAny parent can point a child toward conformity and comfort. <em>You<\/em> point them toward Christ\u2014Christ who was, Himself, the most alien and strange of all. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I was young mom, I was talking to another mom, who was a little further along from me about a situation I had with my son. I didn\u2019t want him to see this movie that was being shown at a birthday party that he was going to, but I was really embarrassed to talk to the other mom about it. I was asking her: \u201cDo you think I should just send him?\u2014I should just let him go?\u201d Her name was Aileen Mulcahy. Aileen had four children, who were just a little bit older than mine; and she listened to me very patiently. I think she must have concealed what she was really thinking until I was done. Then, she said: \u201cYou know, Jen, I believe that I will stand before God and give an account for the way I raise these children; so I don\u2019t <em>care<\/em> what that mother thinks.\u201d I have carried that with me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy reference point is <em>different<\/em>. The alien family is not concerned with fearing what other parents think; they are concerned with the fear of the Lord. Alien parents trade the fear of man for the life-giving fear of the Lord, because life is too short to spend fearing the wrong things and the wrong ways. As Christian parents, the most hopeful thing we can do is lift up our own eyes and train the eyes of our children to behold our Savior, alien and strange. He is coming on the clouds. When He comes, may He find the family of God, and your family, and my family desperately hoping and yearning to look like Him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, we\u2019ve been listening to Jen Wilkin with Part Three of a message on parenting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParenting flows out of our own character and our own walk with Christ. We can\u2019t parent better than we are, so we have to make sure that we are walking with Jesus before we talk to our kids about walking with Jesus. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And children, in case you haven\u2019t noticed, are redemptive. [Laughter] They press you hard against God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> They do; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And if you haven\u2019t been pressed hard against God because of your kids yet, I\u2019m going to tell you\u2014I\u2019m not a prophet, but I can tell you\u2014after Barbara and I had kids in our home for over 28 years\u2014now, we\u2019ve been parents for longer than that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014I guess 43 years, because we\u2019re still parents now. We know much about how our children press us against God to be more and more dependent on Him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014which is obviously key to this whole equation of parenting\u2014along with mentoring from couples who have been through it\u2014some biblical instruction on the subject. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m just thinking of the themes that get addressed in the new video series that we\u2019re releasing in a couple of weeks called <em>FamilyLife\u2019s<\/em> <em>Art of Parenting<\/em>. It\u2019s eight sessions that take you through what the Bible teaches about parenting and helps you focus on where your priorities need to be, as a mom or as a dad. The series will be available \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMay 1<sup>st<\/sup>. If you want to pre-order, you can save $50 off the cost of the DVD kit. Go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com, to find out more about <em>FamilyLife\u2019s<\/em> <em>Art of Parenting<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, keep in mind the movie we\u2019ve got coming to theaters, May 1<sup>st<\/sup> and May 3<sup>rd<\/sup>\u2014two showings only\u2014it\u2019s a movie called <em>Like Arrows<\/em>. We think of it as Session Zero for <em>FamilyLife\u2019s Art of Parenting<\/em> video series. Some theaters are already starting to sell out; so if you want to reserve tickets, you ought to go online now to FamilyLifeToday.com. You can type in your zip code and find out theaters near you where this movie is going to be showing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll of this has, at the core, one goal; and that is, we want to see moms and dads equipped to raise the next generation with Jesus and the gospel at the core of all that you\u2019re doing. Again, find out more at FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, please keep in mind\u2014please pray for couples who will be attending <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways this weekend. We\u2019ve got getaways happening in Anchorage, Alaska; Branson, Missouri; Portland, Maine; and Ventura, California. We\u2019ll have thousands of couples joining us this weekend, including some pastors and their spouses who will be attending. In fact, I\u2019ve been mentioning our Pastors\u2019 Scholarship Fund. Thanks to those of you who have contributed to help provide funding so that we can continue to send pastors and spouses to these getaways at no cost to them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019d like to make a contribution to the Pastors\u2019 Scholarship Fund, go to FamilyLifeToday.com; and you can donate to the scholarship fund, online, or make a general donation to help cover the cost of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe appreciate your support. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church. Then, we hope you join us back on Monday when we\u2019re going to talk to a dad and his adult daughter about what they would do differently if they were going through the dating years again. Daniel Anderson and Jacquelyn Meza are here to talk about, maybe, some new ways of thinking about guiding your kids through the dating years. I hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> of Little Rock, Arkansas; \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:27:36"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["25.27M"],"filesize_raw":["26492274"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300207.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300207.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Wilkin explains how our children's possessions, entertainment, friends-entire lifestyle-should display Christ in sharp contrast to the unbelieving world around them.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-04-20.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Every parent wants to make sure his or her child is well cared for \/ well taken care of. Jen Wilkin says, \u201cWe need to understand that what is best for them is that they learn that enough is often enough.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen:<\/strong> Enough is a concept that we are losing in our culture as well. We have parents who\u2014because of guilt of not being around the kids enough or whatever it is\u2014they begin to sort of purchase their approval by giving them whatever they want whenever they want it. Why?\u2014because we think we are going to satisfy the child\u2014but studies show that, when you give a child what they want exactly when they want it, that you don\u2019t create a child who is satisfied\u2014you create a child who is insatiable \/ who is <em>never<\/em> satisfied. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, April 20<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019ve got some interesting thoughts for you today, like the idea that sometimes depriving your children of what they want may be what\u2019s actually best for them, even if they make it hard for you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll hear more from Jen Wilkin about that today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Friday edition. As we raise our kids today, we want them to fit into the culture; but there\u2019s a difference between fitting in and being conformed to a culture; isn\u2019t there? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s right, Bob. They can\u2019t adopt the values of the culture; so you have to equip your children to know how to think, how to act, how to behave, and how to train their hearts so that, when they\u2019re facing circumstances that they hadn\u2019t planned on, they\u2019ll know what to do; because their heart has been trained to obey God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is something we\u2019ve been doing a lot of thinking about this year, because we are hoping to launch, in 2018, a movement. We\u2019ve talked about parenting for years\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014you helped develop a parenting conference back in the \u201890s. We\u2019ve talked about it often, here, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; but we\u2019re starting to put together some resources that we think can have a powerful impact in the lives of moms and dads and in the lives of the next generation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We want to equip one million parents, in the next three years, with a practical, biblical game plan for <em>each<\/em> of their children\u2014to help you anticipate what your child is going to face, and to know how to respond according to the Scriptures, and then train your children how to think, which what we\u2019re talking about today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; we\u2019ve got a movie coming out May 1<sup>st<\/sup> and 3<sup>rd<\/sup> called <em>Like Arrows<\/em>. We\u2019re also releasing, the first of May, a new video series called <em>FamilyLife\u2019s<\/em> <em>Art of Parenting<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup>, eight sessions for small groups to go through together. It\u2019s available for pre-order now at substantial discount, by the way, if you order before May 1<sup>st<\/sup>. There is also going to be an online component\u2014there\u2019s going to be a free course, online, that couples can go through together if they\u2019d like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, this fall, you and Barbara are releasing a book called <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is all with some purposefulness and intentionality so that moms and dads, who are raising the next generation, can be intentional and strategic about what they are doing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And we\u2019re going to hear today from a mom, who is in the process of raising her children. Jen Wilkin joins us as she gave a message at the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission\u2019s Parenting Conference, back last August. Bob, she\u2019s on target as she talks about parents equipping your kids to know how to be aliens in this world\u2014how to think, how to behave, and how to go with an offensive game plan. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes\u2014how to fit in without being conformed by the culture. We\u2019ve already heard her this week talk about how this way of thinking ought to affect your children\u2019s activities and how it ought to affect their speech. We pick up today as she is dealing with issue number three. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen:<\/strong> Number three, possessions: \u201cThe alien child will not own what other children own; or more precisely, the alien child will not own what other children own when they own it.\u201d In our homes, we should be cultivating a sense of delayed gratification. Why?\u2014because we are a people of delayed gratification \/ we await something better. This, to me, is probably the most potentially devastating element of what technology seems to be doing to our children\u2019s brains. They are losing their capacity to wait; and God help us, as parents. We are often handing them the means to do it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we raise children, who do not know how to wait, we stand very little chance of being able to help them become disciples who know how to wait for the Lord, who know how to be patient with others in their suffering or in their sin. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is a basic skill of being a Christ-follower, so we should look for ways to teach delayed gratification. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI will tell you straight up\u2014when I heard that Amazon was developing drones so that they could just drop my package on the front porch as soon as I thought I wanted something, I was like: \u201cI am in! Can we get the Girl Scouts hooked up with that?\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014\u201cbecause I want those cookies, and I want them yesterday.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou think about that\u2014a big piece of that is modeling. One of the things I had to tell myself, as a young mom\u2014because I had to take all four kids to the store with me\u2014and one of my favorite things was how people would stop me and say, \u201cAre they all yours?\u201d [Laughter] It was all I could do to not say: \u201cWho picks up extra toddlers to go to this\u2014who?\u2014of course, they\u2019re all mine! Don\u2019t you think, if I had any other option: \u2018Hey, kids, let\u2019s go to the store. Let\u2019s bring some friends along.\u2019\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSometimes, my time in Target was a little frantic; right? You\u2019re just like randomly grabbing things fast\u2014\u201cYou got to get me out of here before something explodes\u201d; right? What I began to realize was that I needed to stop. I needed to pick things up and look at them, and you know what I needed to do?\u2014put them back. My children needed a visual way to learn that just because I might want it doesn\u2019t mean that I get it right then. We thought about ways that we could show them: \u201cHey, we want this,\u201d\u2014and in many cases, we have the money for it\u2014it\u2019s not a \u201cNo\u201d; it\u2019s a \u201cNot now.\u201d That\u2019s a good concept for our children to understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat means that we will raise children who view possessions in a different light. They will value last year\u2019s possession and not always want this year\u2019s. They will understand the difference between \u201cmore\u201d and \u201cless\u201d and \u201cenough.\u201d Enough is a concept that we are losing in our culture as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have parents who\u2014because of guilt of not being around the kids enough or whatever it is\u2014they begin to sort of purchase their approval by giving them whatever they want whenever they want it. Why?\u2014because they think that we are going to satisfy the child\u2014but studies show that, when you give a child what they want exactly when they want it, you don\u2019t create a child who is satisfied\u2014you create a child who is insatiable \/ who is <em>never<\/em> satisfied. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talk to our children about needs versus wants. Here\u2019s the thing\u2014I\u2019m not saying that you never give your child the nice thing\u2014you know how they\u2019ll come and they\u2019ll be like, \u201cI just really want this.\u201d You\u2019re like, \u201cThat\u2019s the dumbest thing,\u201d\u2014in your head, you\u2019re like, \u201cThat is such a dumb thing to want\u201d; but they <em>really<\/em> want it\u2014like it\u2019s a pair of tennis shoes that cost 450 bucks. You\u2019re like, \u201cOkay; at Target, I can buy you tennis for $32.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat do you do? You meet them halfway, because they are going to learn a great lesson if they shell out the difference between what you\u2019re willing to pay and what the item costs. They will either gain enjoyment from the item that is equivalent to what they paid for, and they will learn a lesson about how to spend money that way\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014or they will wear the brand-new tennis shoes, that are white, in a giant mud puddle and realize that probably they weren\u2019t the best use of their money; but they get to learn something about stewardship themselves. You can partner with them and have them take some responsibility over their possessions by asking them to contribute once they have money in their little bank accounts. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother thing for us that was kind of critical was\u2014we delayed cell phone usage as long as we possibly could. I know it\u2019s not as easy to do that as it was when my kids were coming up, but we allowed them to have a cell phone in the eighth grade. We bought them one of those go-phones, and they had to pay for it. It was <em>awesome<\/em>\u2014they would get sucked into someone\u2019s group text. They are getting charged 15 cents every time some kid sends a text, and they were <em>dying<\/em>. What it did\u2014is it taught them to use the phone for needful communication only because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014P.S.: That\u2019s what phones are for! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, later, when they hit high school, we did give them a smartphone before they left for college. You know why?\u2014I don\u2019t want you going to college and getting a smartphone for the first time when you\u2019re not living under my roof. So, we gave them opportunities, as they were appropriate. My kids would say: \u201cWell, I need a phone. How am I going to call you if I\u2019m in trouble?\u201d I\u2019m like: \u201cEvery single one of your friends has a phone. I am not worried that you can reach me if you need to.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother thing that I saw a lot of\u2014that I was even aware of in myself\u2014was that, once my child had a phone, I was more likely to say, \u201cYes,\u201d to a situation I was not that comfortable with under the assumption: \u201cWell, they can just call me if anything goes wrong.\u201d The phone can give us a false sense of security. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, we weigh possessions differently than other people do. We may say, \u201cYes\u201d; we may say, \u201cNo\u201d; we may say, \u201cNot now\u201d; we may ask them to partner, when they are able, in the expense; but we don\u2019t always have to have the newest thing, and we don\u2019t have to have a ton of it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talk about giving as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFourth: \u201cAn alien child will not watch, read, or listen to what other children watch, read, or listen to. An alien child will view entertainment differently.\u201d If you are waiting for me to give you a list of what your kid can watch and can\u2019t watch, you are going to be sorely disappointed; because I am not a fool, and it\u2019s your job. It\u2019s your job to discern what it is that your children should be watching\u2014more importantly, how much they should be watching. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere is the thing that I need you to understand. Anytime we sit down with entertainment, we are making a choice between doing that and doing something else. I would say what other speakers have said\u2014that long car trips were a time when most of our best conversations happened. We have an 11-hour ride out to my parents\u2019 home in Santa Fe. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would tell the children: \u201cYou can have a movie in the morning and a movie in the afternoon on this trip.\u201d They were like, \u201cOkay; that\u2019s cool.\u201d Everybody else is basically watching shows the <em>whole<\/em> trip when they go somewhere\u2014but whatever. Then, they would choose <em>The Sound of Music<\/em> because it\u2019s three-and-a-half hours long. [Laughter] But we need to understand that when you\u2019re\u2014that\u2019s an example of, when you\u2019re all in the same place together, that is an opportunity to train or just to have a conversation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOftentimes, we are trading training for entertaining. If you are waiting for a table at a restaurant, and you hand your child the phone instead of sitting there and seeing if a conversation bubbles up, you have just chosen entertaining over training. It doesn\u2019t mean that you never do that; right? You might do it sometimes; but if that\u2019s what characterizes you\u2014is to medicate waiting with entertaining versus training\u2014you might end up raising a child who, anytime they are faced with waiting, finds a way to medicate it. The medications get scarier the older we get. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, training versus entertaining\u2014long car trips are not a time for everyone to just zone out in their own little entertainment world. Part of the time, they are for sure; right?\u2014like when everybody is totally freaking out. But if you think, \u201cI can\u2019t survive a long car trip unless my kids are plugged in somewhere,\u201d I\u2019d ask you to reevaluate that you are trading a precious time when you do that\u2014so, training versus entertaining. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother thing that I\u2019ve noticed in our society is that entertaining is no longer a shared value. In other words, we go on a car trip\u2014Jimmy\u2019s got music on his phone, and Susie\u2019s got her music on her phone or her screen in front of her. Mom\u2019s listening to something, and dad\u2019s listening to something else. Even when we are at home, a lot of times this is what happens; right?\u2014like someone is in one room watching something \/ someone is in another room watching something. Entertainment is ceasing to be a shared value\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it is seen as an individual thing that we do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat if we didn\u2019t do that?\u2014like what if we all sat down together? What if, when you were in the car, you all listened to the same music? What if, when you watch the movie, everybody watched the <em>same<\/em> movie?\u2014and you reinforced that idea that: \u201cWe are walking by the way <em>together<\/em>. This is something we are doing together.\u201d It wasn\u2019t just about enjoying the entertainment; it was about enjoying <em>our enjoyment<\/em> of the entertainment <em>together<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe live in houses that are designed to push us apart many times\u2014everybody has their own room; everybody has their own TV; everybody has their own everything. One of the great gifts of having all of these kids that came at the same time was that we couldn\u2019t move to a house big enough fast enough, and we were all on top of each other. It was a <em>gift<\/em> from the Lord\u2014it was gift from the Lord. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, my son did go off to college and have to tell his friends who KC and the Sunshine Band were because none of them had ever heard of it. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe were like, \u201cSorry; not sorry,\u201d because we all shared the same musical tastes. It was a great way for us to build an identity, as a family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFifth, friends: \u201cAn alien child will not invest in the same kinds of relationships that other children do.\u201d We train our children to recognize character. We train them to flee from drama and disorder. The best way to train your child to flee from drama and disorder in relationships is to not have them in your home. We had a rule that no one gets to press the drama button in our house. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve got two girls; I\u2019ve got two boys. I would love to tell you that the girls were where the drama came from, but that is actually not true. It does not seem to be a gender-specific thing. Boy drama looks more like WWE [World Wrestling Entertainment]. Girl drama looks more like flinging a hairbrush at somebody across the bathroom. It\u2019s the same motive; right? So, we said: \u201cNo one gets to push the drama button. You can come tell me what\u2019s wrong, but you cannot flip out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cIf you flip out, you can come back when you\u2019re done flipping out. Then, we will talk about it. No one gets to push the drama button.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, you send children into their schoolroom relationships, and they begin to realize that a lot of people don\u2019t have that rule. They gravitate toward the children who have more self-control around their emotions. They begin to recognize character and to flee from drama and disorder. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is a really an important piece\u2014work to make the home their primary place of belonging, and how is the best way to accomplish this? We ask our children to be friends with one another\u2014siblings can be friends. This is such an important thing to me. Sibling rivalry is <em>accepted<\/em> by us as the way that the home should function. I\u2019m telling you that you may not be able to neutralize it, but you must not normalize it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know why?\u2014because we are part of the family of God, where we are to view ourselves as brothers and sisters partnering in kingdom work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere are 54 \u201cone another\u2019s\u201d in the New Testament that we cannot hope to fulfill if we have adversarial relationships with one another. Is it any wonder that there is fractiousness among the brothers and sisters in the church when so many of our homes have said that fractiousness between brothers and sisters is all we can hope for? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy husband was best friends with his sister. Her senior year, he attended a dance as her <em>date<\/em>. They have pictures of them, in high school, holding hands at Disney World\u2014in high school! [Laughter] It\u2019s okay to say it makes you uncomfortable. [Laughter] My brothers locked me in the closet, so I had no frame of reference for this. If I hadn\u2019t seen it in Jeff\u2019s family, I couldn\u2019t have hoped for it; but I\u2019m here to tell you it\u2019s a thing, and it\u2019s the <em>best<\/em> thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>So, when our kids were fighting with one another, do you know what we did? We said: \u201cGuess who\u2019s not going over to anybody else\u2019s house?\u2014you guys\u2014because until you can get along with each other, you don\u2019t need to go anywhere else; because these are your best friends.\u201d I know they were thinking in their heads: \u201cThat is not my best friend. I would murder this person if you left the room right now.\u201d [Laughter] But we said it again and again: \u201cThis is your best friend,\u201d \u201cThis is your best friend,\u201d \u201cThis is your best friend.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know why?\u2014Jeff had the funniest conversation with the kids one night. He was like, \u201cHey, do you know who my best friend was in third grade?\u201d They are like, \u201cNo.\u201d He goes: \u201cNeither do I. I\u2019ve got no idea where that guy is, and neither will you. [Laughter] You know who you are always going to be with? These people\u2014these four people in this room\u2014the four of you are going to take care, Lord willing, of Mom and Dad as we age. You will have these people forever\u2014for the whole length of your life on this earth. Don\u2019t you want them to be your best friends?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey <em>are<\/em> each other\u2019s best\u2014like I can\u2019t even believe it <em>worked<\/em>. I\u2019m so faithless! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe three that are down at Texas A&amp;M\u2014the three that are down there go to family dinner <em>together<\/em> and FaceTime with the one who is still at home\u2014and sit there and just laugh their heads off. It is the sweetest thing, and I did not think it was possible. I\u2019m standing here to repent and to tell you that it is. Expect it and work toward it with faithfulness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat\u2019s the bottom line? You probably see this coming. The only reliable way to raise an alien child is to be an alien parent. You, yourself, must drive to know, love, and serve God with everything that you have. More important than right relationship with your child is right relationship with your heavenly Father. It is your only hope of right relationship with your child, because think about this\u2014before your child ever learns to read a Bible, they will read you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAny parent can point a child toward conformity and comfort. <em>You<\/em> point them toward Christ\u2014Christ who was, Himself, the most alien and strange of all. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I was young mom, I was talking to another mom, who was a little further along from me about a situation I had with my son. I didn\u2019t want him to see this movie that was being shown at a birthday party that he was going to, but I was really embarrassed to talk to the other mom about it. I was asking her: \u201cDo you think I should just send him?\u2014I should just let him go?\u201d Her name was Aileen Mulcahy. Aileen had four children, who were just a little bit older than mine; and she listened to me very patiently. I think she must have concealed what she was really thinking until I was done. Then, she said: \u201cYou know, Jen, I believe that I will stand before God and give an account for the way I raise these children; so I don\u2019t <em>care<\/em> what that mother thinks.\u201d I have carried that with me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy reference point is <em>different<\/em>. The alien family is not concerned with fearing what other parents think; they are concerned with the fear of the Lord. Alien parents trade the fear of man for the life-giving fear of the Lord, because life is too short to spend fearing the wrong things and the wrong ways. As Christian parents, the most hopeful thing we can do is lift up our own eyes and train the eyes of our children to behold our Savior, alien and strange. He is coming on the clouds. When He comes, may He find the family of God, and your family, and my family desperately hoping and yearning to look like Him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, we\u2019ve been listening to Jen Wilkin with Part Three of a message on parenting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParenting flows out of our own character and our own walk with Christ. We can\u2019t parent better than we are, so we have to make sure that we are walking with Jesus before we talk to our kids about walking with Jesus. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And children, in case you haven\u2019t noticed, are redemptive. [Laughter] They press you hard against God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> They do; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And if you haven\u2019t been pressed hard against God because of your kids yet, I\u2019m going to tell you\u2014I\u2019m not a prophet, but I can tell you\u2014after Barbara and I had kids in our home for over 28 years\u2014now, we\u2019ve been parents for longer than that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014I guess 43 years, because we\u2019re still parents now. We know much about how our children press us against God to be more and more dependent on Him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014which is obviously key to this whole equation of parenting\u2014along with mentoring from couples who have been through it\u2014some biblical instruction on the subject. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m just thinking of the themes that get addressed in the new video series that we\u2019re releasing in a couple of weeks called <em>FamilyLife\u2019s<\/em> <em>Art of Parenting<\/em>. It\u2019s eight sessions that take you through what the Bible teaches about parenting and helps you focus on where your priorities need to be, as a mom or as a dad. The series will be available \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMay 1<sup>st<\/sup>. If you want to pre-order, you can save $50 off the cost of the DVD kit. Go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com, to find out more about <em>FamilyLife\u2019s<\/em> <em>Art of Parenting<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, keep in mind the movie we\u2019ve got coming to theaters, May 1<sup>st<\/sup> and May 3<sup>rd<\/sup>\u2014two showings only\u2014it\u2019s a movie called <em>Like Arrows<\/em>. We think of it as Session Zero for <em>FamilyLife\u2019s Art of Parenting<\/em> video series. Some theaters are already starting to sell out; so if you want to reserve tickets, you ought to go online now to FamilyLifeToday.com. You can type in your zip code and find out theaters near you where this movie is going to be showing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll of this has, at the core, one goal; and that is, we want to see moms and dads equipped to raise the next generation with Jesus and the gospel at the core of all that you\u2019re doing. Again, find out more at FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, please keep in mind\u2014please pray for couples who will be attending <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways this weekend. We\u2019ve got getaways happening in Anchorage, Alaska; Branson, Missouri; Portland, Maine; and Ventura, California. We\u2019ll have thousands of couples joining us this weekend, including some pastors and their spouses who will be attending. In fact, I\u2019ve been mentioning our Pastors\u2019 Scholarship Fund. Thanks to those of you who have contributed to help provide funding so that we can continue to send pastors and spouses to these getaways at no cost to them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019d like to make a contribution to the Pastors\u2019 Scholarship Fund, go to FamilyLifeToday.com; and you can donate to the scholarship fund, online, or make a general donation to help cover the cost of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe appreciate your support. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church. Then, we hope you join us back on Monday when we\u2019re going to talk to a dad and his adult daughter about what they would do differently if they were going through the dating years again. Daniel Anderson and Jacquelyn Meza are here to talk about, maybe, some new ways of thinking about guiding your kids through the dating years. I hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> of Little Rock, Arkansas; \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. 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