{"id":300173,"date":"2018-03-12T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-03-12T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/modeling-integrity\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:21","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:21","slug":"modeling-integrity","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/modeling-integrity\/","title":{"rendered":"Modeling Integrity"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Crawford Loritts tells stories about his father&#8217;s unyielding commitment to integrity, which he learned from his father, who learned it from his father.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-03-12.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:27:41","filesize":"25.35M","filesize_raw":"26583790","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2837,2833,2835],"tags":[4086,4277,4278,4276],"podcast_series":[7198],"cwp_profile":[3076],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300173","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fathers","category-godly-legacy","category-raising-boys","tag-commitment","tag-fathers","tag-integrity","tag-legacy","podcast_series-lessons-from-a-father-who-was-always-there","cwp_profile-crawford-loritts","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300173\/modeling-integrity","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300173\/modeling-integrity","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"3vFgJr5v3G\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/modeling-integrity\/\">Modeling Integrity<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/modeling-integrity\/embed\/#?secret=3vFgJr5v3G\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Modeling Integrity&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"3vFgJr5v3G\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-03-12.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-03-12.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Dr. Crawford Loritts is profoundly aware of how his life was marked and shaped by a father who was there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford:<\/strong> My dad used to say to me as I was growing up\u2014and particularly as I was facing difficult times and, maybe, I didn\u2019t want to follow through on something; and I said I was going to do something\u2014boy, he would pull me aside and say: \u201cSon, all you have at the end of the day is what you say. That\u2019s all you have. That\u2019s all you have, and you better be good by what comes out of your mouth\u2014integrity. If you say you are this, then it needs to be reflected in how you act.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, March 12<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. A lot of what Crawford Loritts understood about parenting came from watching a father who did the job well. We\u2019ll hear more from him today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Monday edition. You know, we\u2019ve often said that behind every great man, there\u2019s a great woman or that we stand on the shoulders of others. I don\u2019t know how often it\u2019s been reflected on that behind great men and women are often faithful moms and dads, who did their job well and created a foundation for their sons and daughters to grow up in where those sons and daughters thrived. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You know, as you talk about that, I can\u2019t help but think about our guest on the program today, who gave a message at the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission\u2019s Parenting Conference, back last August. I sat in the audience as I listened to my friend, Crawford Loritts, speak about his heritage that Crawford was given by his great grandfather, Peter, whom he described as a praying, singing slave.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And he passed on a living faith that, now, resides in Crawford\u2019s life and in, also, Crawford\u2019s four children; and I think, soon, his ten grandchildren as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; Crawford is a friend of ours. He and his wife Karen have spoken at <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways for years. Crawford is also the pastor at Fellowship Bible Church in Roswell, Georgia, suburban Atlanta. He\u2019s spoken around the world on a variety of issues, including marriage and family. His message, at the parenting conference you were attending, was a riveting message. In fact, we thought, \u201cThis is one our listeners need to hear.\u201d So, today, we\u2019re going to hear Part One of Crawford Loritts talking about lessons he learned on integrity from a father who lived it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford:<\/strong> About 20 years ago, I wrote a book entitled <em>Never Walk Away: Lessons on Integrity from a Father Who Lived It<\/em>; obviously, it was about my dad\u2019s incredible impact on my heart and life. In fact, next to Jesus Christ, my father has had the most important, strategic, wonderful influence on my life. Who I am today\u2014so much of what I think, and how I feel, and how I act, and, particularly, my approach to my marriage and our family\u2014has Pop\u2019s signature all over me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, Dan Fogelberg wrote a song a number of years ago\u2014a ballad. Part of the refrain of that song goes something like this: \u201cThe leader of the band is tired; his eyes are growing cold. His blood is in my instrument, and his song is my soul. My life is just a poor attempt to imitate the man. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI\u2019m just the living legacy to leader of the band.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy father was a grandson of a slave. He was born in 1914\u2014February 13, 1914. He was the youngest boy of 14 children. So, his grandfather Peter \/ my great grandfather was a slave. Peter, they say\u2014my dad remembers him: \u201cPeter lived to be an old man. Peter was a singing and praying man,\u201d he said. Some of my father\u2019s most vivid memories were seeing his grandfather rock back and forth on the old homestead there in Catawba County, North Carolina, a place called Newton Conover, where he would just sing and pray. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPeter was an illiterate man\u2014couldn\u2019t read \/ couldn\u2019t write\u2014but he loved Jesus, and\u2014get this\u2014he passionately loved the Word of God. The story is told \/ the legend is\u2014he would have his children and grandchildren read him familiar passages of Scripture over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over again. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe old boy had committed a lot of that to memory. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere\u2019s what I want you to catch. Despite the fact that Peter was a slave\u2014and let\u2019s not glorify slavery\u2014families were intentionally broken up. When young boys reached about 14\/15\/16 years of age, they bought a high price\u2014they were studded out, so to speak. It was not our most bright and shining moment\u2014it created a whole lot of damnable things that we are still dealing with in our culture today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut despite all of that, I don\u2019t know what happened to Peter. Peter developed a passion and a love for God and a love for his family. Because of his commitment to Jesus Christ and his commitment to his family, he forged generations of strong men, strong male leadership, and strong families. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI stand here just humbled\u2014I don\u2019t take credit for any of this. I don\u2019t know why I was born and raised in a household, where my dad showed up, and where he loved the Lord, and he loved his family, and he left his signature over us. Why wasn\u2019t I born in a situation where he wasn\u2019t there? Why wasn\u2019t I born with huge deficits in my heart and life? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd what I want to say today, and underscore before us, is that we\u2014one of my great concerns where evangelicalism is going today is that\u2014somehow or another, in our desire to become intellectually palatable, and acceptable in the marketplace of life, and to broker influences in the corridors of power, and to not be looked at as dumb and stupid Christians\u2014part of my concern is that we are wandering away from the spiritual core of who we really are and the power that\u2019s necessary and needed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDon\u2019t ever underestimate the gospel, and don\u2019t ever underestimate the power of the Spirit of God, and don\u2019t ever underestimate the power of prayer to change your life and future generations\u2014that is to be the centerpiece of parenting. It\u2019s not the quid pro quo, or the various strategies and coping mechanisms\u2014although they might be important\u2014and the tips that we get in the books that we read, and the blogs that we read, and podcasts, and that kind of thing\u2014absolutely wonderful. At the end of the day, the thing that is going to shape your future\u2014shape your family \/ help your child to make it home before dark, spiritually\u2014is a few callouses on your knees, with an open Bible, and a walk before God. That must <em>never<\/em> be forsaken. That has got to be the centerpiece of what we\u2019re really, really all about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPop always showed up. He wasn\u2019t perfect, but he was a man of <em>impeccable<\/em> integrity\u2014impeccable integrity. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy father\u2014this is not Pollyanna-ish \/ I\u2019m not revisiting history\u2014but my dad never made a promise to me or my sisters that he did not keep. Now, he may have said, \u201cSon, I will be at your ballgame,\u201d\u2014and he discovered he had to work and had to work something else out\u2014but on balance, he never made a promise that he didn\u2019t keep. His word was his bond. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>He was a little bit paranoid about showing up. In fact, I couldn\u2019t even quit a part-time job that I had as a teenager\u2014I better have a good excuse for that\u2014because he said, \u201cIf you told that man you\u2019re going to show up, you show up.\u201d And we\u2019ve kind of raised our kids the same way, especially our boys. When they were playing sports\u2014my rule around the household: \u201cIf you play, you stay. You don\u2019t quit because it\u2019s hard. You don\u2019t quit because it\u2019s difficult. You don\u2019t quit because there is a little bit of opposition. You don\u2019t quit because you don\u2019t like this situation. <em>You show up<\/em>. You finish the endurance ride.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe essence of parenting is to be a portrait of the desired destination. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe essence of parenting is not necessarily great insights and tools. The truth of the matter is that the power and the authority that we have to shape the next generation is lodged in what we model and what they <em>see<\/em> in front of us and not necessarily what we say. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, that is what the Bible is all about\u2014the Bible is into prophetic leadership; that is, if you are going to lead anything in the Scripture\u2014and this is the reason why character is so terribly important\u2014if you are going to lead anything in the Scripture, it\u2019s not about your ability to plan, and to have insights, and to line things up, and to recruit, and to develop the resources, and to think outside the box\u2014and all of these things that we celebrate today\u2014but if you are going to lead anything in the Bible\u2014<em>anything<\/em> that has God\u2019s name over it \/ anything that stewards what God wants to do from one generation to the next\u2014then you have to embrace the reality that you\u2019ve got to be the <em>portrait<\/em> of the desired destination. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s no other way! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhatever I want my children to be, they have to see it in me. They have to see me aggressively moving toward that because they were born\u2014they were born to be drawn toward what they <em>see<\/em>\u2014what they see. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, my daddy\u2014he didn\u2019t have a college degree \/ he was a salt-of-the-earth kind of person\u2014but his understanding of the Word of God, and his understanding of what it took to be the leader in his household, and what he saw from his father Milton \/ my grandfather and his great grandfather Peter, he passed on. He realized, if he didn\u2019t want his children to lie, he better not be telling a bunch of lies. He understood, if he wanted his children to be people who would stand up and look people in the eye and tell the truth and follow through on their commitments, then he had better do the same. If he wanted kids that would love their wives and husbands\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014and put them first in their lives\u2014then he better not dog out my mother and put her down or disrespect her. If he wanted us kids to go to church, then he needed to make sure that he was there, leading the way\u2014integrity, integrity, integrity. Integrity is a state of being whole \/ undivided moral predictability\u2014behavior and choices that reflect your core beliefs and convictions. That\u2019s what integrity is really all about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy dad used to say to me, as I was growing up\u2014and particularly as I was facing difficult times and, maybe, I didn\u2019t want to follow through on something; and I said I was going to do something\u2014boy, he would pull me aside and say: \u201cSon, all you have at the end of the day is what you say. That\u2019s all you have. That\u2019s all you have, and you better be good by what comes out of your mouth\u2014integrity. If you say you are this, then it needs to be reflected in how you act.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParenting is all about preparing a generation for a time that you cannot see, and that\u2019s the driving force behind all of us. One of the great benefits of suffering and one of the great benefits of Jim Crow\u2014interestingly enough, in the sovereignty of God, is they didn\u2019t have a lot of margin \/ they didn\u2019t have a lot of filler \/ they didn\u2019t have a lot of applause from the broader community. My great grandfather, my grandfather, my dad, and my uncles\u2014who grew up during Jim Crow\u2014they realized that all they had was one another, and all they had was home. They were passionate about things becoming better, and they had a vision for you doing more than what they were able to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParenting takes a look at where things <em>ought<\/em> to be, and where that child <em>could<\/em> be, and leverages the moment in history to <em>get<\/em> them there\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014that\u2019s what parenting is all about. Your child is just passing through, and our job is to point them toward God and point them toward the door\u2014that\u2019s what our responsibility is. Thank you, Jesus! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen my father was dying, back in 1995\u2014he had congestive heart failure\u2014and the last three years of his life [were] very difficult for me, because here\u2019s a man who worked hard his whole life. My father worked\u2014he usually was working more than one job and took care of his family. His great joy was being able to provide for us. To see him go downhill was just\u2014I mean, it was just gut-wrenching for me\u2014strong, yet he could barely make it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, the end was coming, and he was dying. I\u2019ll never forget this\u2014it was a poignant moment. I was standing next to his bedside; and he just looked at me in a moment of lucidity and said, \u201cBoy, I did the best I could.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said, \u201cPop, you did a great job!\u201d He said, \u201cSon, I want you to take care of your mom and your sisters.\u201d What was he doing?\u2014he was passing a torch \/ passing a baton\u2014\u201cThe race is over.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy whole life, I\u2019ve always wanted to be like him\u2014my whole life. I always wanted to <em>think<\/em> like him\u2014my whole life. I\u2019m in leadership now. I tell people all the time: \u201cYou know, my greatest lessons in leadership\u2014sorry, I mean, I should have read your blog [Laughter]; and I didn\u2019t read your book\u2014sorry! [Laughter] But my greatest lessons in leadership came from the grandson of a slave, who\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014\u201cday in and day out, and day in and day out, every day of his life\u2014showed up. When he would blow it and mess up, he\u2019d make it right.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ll tell you this quick story before I slide into 1 Kings, Chapter 2, and talk about the handoff; and I\u2019ll be done. When I was 12 years old, you know, I was a typical 12-year-old guy. I had a number of brain cramps. [Laughter] On the way to school in the spring, we would walk past this factory that made these chains. I don\u2019t know why I did this; but I was with some friends of mine\u2014we would\u2014there were some open boxes, and we stole some chains. It was like chain necklaces and stuff. We stole them and thought we had gotten away with something. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis was the absolute worse day of my life, though, because of what happened. My father used to work nights, but he rotated one evening a week that he was off. He happened to be off that evening, in the providence and sovereignty of God. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe telephone rang at the house, and it was a policewoman named Mrs. Brown. Yes; I don\u2019t want to say some things; this is being recorded. Mrs. Brown\u2014let\u2019s just say she was tough. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere was this kid by the name of Stanley that looked just like me\u2014believe it or not. I know it\u2019s impossible\u2014we could pass for twins. Well, when Mrs. Brown called the house, my mother gave the phone to my dad; and my dad\u2019s listening. As she\u2019s talking to him, he\u2019s looking at me; and I\u2019m saying, \u201cThis is not going to end well.\u201d So, she told him\u2014well, Stanley had told Mrs. Brown where to go, where she didn\u2019t need an overcoat; okay?\u2014you got that picture? She thought that I told her that. Now, I have to confess, I <em>felt<\/em> like it on a number of occasions; but I didn\u2019t do that\u2014didn\u2019t do it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPop hangs up the phone. He looks at me and said, \u201cBoy, have you lost your mind?!\u201d I was talking fast: \u201cPop, I didn\u2019t do that. I didn\u2019t disrespect\u2014 I didn\u2019t do that.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRight after that\u2014I kid you not\u2014there was a knock on the front door. He opens the door, and there were policemen there. What had happened was that my friends, who had stolen the chains\u2014and I was a part of that group\u2014told on me\u2014they had gotten caught. This was the worst night of my young life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI won\u2019t bore you with all the details of the story, but I will tell you this\u2014at the\u2014we went down to the factory and got the liver scared out of us. Pop dropped a couple of those boys off\u2014they didn\u2019t have dads in the home. When we walked into the house, I had not seen my dad cry, except for at funerals of his siblings. I\u2019ll never forget this\u2014he looked at me, and a tear began to trickle down his cheeks. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe said, \u201cSon, you hurt my heart.\u201d Then, he did a few other things to make sure my behavior would line up with the expectations. [Laughter] So \u201cYes; you weren\u2019t hurt that bad.\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat crushed me\u2014it broke me \/ it broke me. I forgot about the other exclamation mark, but the reason why it broke me is because I always wanted to be like my father; and he would not have done that! He said: \u201cSon, if you want something, you ask me. You don\u2019t ever have to steal anything. You hurt my heart.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we\u2019re going to break in here. We\u2019ve been listening to the first part of a message from our friend, Crawford Loritts, talking about the important role that his father played in marking his own life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t know that we, as parents, understand how our example, our model, our words, our actions\u2014they are indelibly imprinting things on the hearts and minds of our children\u2014things that will live with them for decades. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And turn them from doing what\u2019s wrong\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014to do what\u2019s right. I know we\u2019ve been talking about the power of a dad, who has integrity; but moms are powerful too, as well, Bob. I just want to encourage moms and dads today to assume your office\u2014the great privilege of being a dad and a mom\u2014to assume it with integrity and to make sure that your words \/ as much as possible that your words match up with your life. In other words, you do what you say you\u2019re going to do\u2014you fulfil your promises. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI look back on my dad, and my dad didn\u2019t need a bunch of lawyers to be tied up to make sure he fulfilled his promises. All you needed from my dad was a handshake, and it was good. If he gave his word, he was going to do it. Bob, I don\u2019t know who I would be today if I had not observed a man, who came from a broken home\u2014my dad\u2019s father abandoned his eight children back in a time when it wasn\u2019t culturally acceptable in anyway whatsoever\u2014yet, my dad was not a victim. My dad earned his living and grew up within three miles of the log cabin where he was born, and he died with a good name. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can just say to you, as a listener: \u201cOne of the greatest gifts you will give your children is that of a good name\u2014a father \/ a mother, who lived out what he or she believes in front of your children. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cThere\u2019s a great need for that as never before.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, we\u2019re about six or seven weeks, now, from releasing a resource that we have been working on for more than a year now that, actually, Crawford\u2019s son, Bryan, and his daughter-in-law, Korie, are a part of. It\u2019s a video series called FamilyLife\u2019s <em>Art of Parenting<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup>, eight sessions that you can go through in a small group; or there is going to be a digital experience of <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>, something you can go through as a couple, online. All of this is designed to help moms and dads understand what the biblical priorities for parenting ought to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, we\u2019re kicking all of this off with a movie that\u2019s going to be in theaters for two nights only\u2014May 1<sup>st<\/sup> and May 3<sup>rd<\/sup>\u2014a movie we\u2019ve produced called <em>Like Arrows<\/em>\u2014got help with this from our friends, Alex and Stephen Kendrick. Alex has a role in the film, and it\u2019s all designed to raise the issue of parenting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe really want to begin a movement of intentional parenting in our culture, and that\u2019s what these resources are all about. You can find out more about what\u2019s coming when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the parenting link you see there. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me also mention\u2014Dr. Crawford Loritts has written a book about his father\u2014a book called <em>Never Walk Away: Lessons on Integrity from a Father Who Lived It<\/em>. It\u2019s a book that we have in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order the book from us, online, as well, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I mentioned this new emphasis on parenting\u2014one of the things we are working on is a strategy to get this material into the hands and hearts of people who don\u2019t listen to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014folks who may not be actively involved in a local church\u2014but people who would be open to understanding what the Bible teaches about how we raise the next generation. We believe there are a lot of folks like that. We are developing strategies, right now, that will help us get this material into their hands. We\u2019ve calculated\u2014it\u2019s going to take us $10 a home to be able to reach someone with this content and get them engaged with what they\u2019re hearing. Of course, they\u2019ll have the chance to hear the gospel as we do that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>We\u2019d love to ask you to help support the work that we\u2019re doing to help us reach more people with God\u2019s design for marriage and family. It\u2019s easy enough to do. You can donate, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY. When you get in touch with us and make a donation, as a way of saying, \u201cThank you,\u201d we want to send you seven prayer cards. These are designed so that you, as a parent or grandparent, can be praying more purposefully\/more intentionally for your children or your grandchildren. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey tuck right into your Bible\u2014they are our gift to you when you donate to help us reach more folks with practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. We look forward to hearing from you, and thanks for your partnership with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you\u2019ll join us back tomorrow when we are, again, going to hear from Dr. Crawford Loritts about the priorities of parents. I hope you can tune in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> of Little Rock, Arkansas; \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:27:41"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["25.35M"],"filesize_raw":["26583790"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300173.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300173.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Loritts tells stories about his father's unyielding commitment to integrity, which he learned from his father, who learned it from his father.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-03-12.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Dr. Crawford Loritts is profoundly aware of how his life was marked and shaped by a father who was there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford:<\/strong> My dad used to say to me as I was growing up\u2014and particularly as I was facing difficult times and, maybe, I didn\u2019t want to follow through on something; and I said I was going to do something\u2014boy, he would pull me aside and say: \u201cSon, all you have at the end of the day is what you say. That\u2019s all you have. That\u2019s all you have, and you better be good by what comes out of your mouth\u2014integrity. If you say you are this, then it needs to be reflected in how you act.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, March 12<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. A lot of what Crawford Loritts understood about parenting came from watching a father who did the job well. We\u2019ll hear more from him today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Monday edition. You know, we\u2019ve often said that behind every great man, there\u2019s a great woman or that we stand on the shoulders of others. I don\u2019t know how often it\u2019s been reflected on that behind great men and women are often faithful moms and dads, who did their job well and created a foundation for their sons and daughters to grow up in where those sons and daughters thrived. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You know, as you talk about that, I can\u2019t help but think about our guest on the program today, who gave a message at the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission\u2019s Parenting Conference, back last August. I sat in the audience as I listened to my friend, Crawford Loritts, speak about his heritage that Crawford was given by his great grandfather, Peter, whom he described as a praying, singing slave.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And he passed on a living faith that, now, resides in Crawford\u2019s life and in, also, Crawford\u2019s four children; and I think, soon, his ten grandchildren as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; Crawford is a friend of ours. He and his wife Karen have spoken at <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways for years. Crawford is also the pastor at Fellowship Bible Church in Roswell, Georgia, suburban Atlanta. He\u2019s spoken around the world on a variety of issues, including marriage and family. His message, at the parenting conference you were attending, was a riveting message. In fact, we thought, \u201cThis is one our listeners need to hear.\u201d So, today, we\u2019re going to hear Part One of Crawford Loritts talking about lessons he learned on integrity from a father who lived it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford:<\/strong> About 20 years ago, I wrote a book entitled <em>Never Walk Away: Lessons on Integrity from a Father Who Lived It<\/em>; obviously, it was about my dad\u2019s incredible impact on my heart and life. In fact, next to Jesus Christ, my father has had the most important, strategic, wonderful influence on my life. Who I am today\u2014so much of what I think, and how I feel, and how I act, and, particularly, my approach to my marriage and our family\u2014has Pop\u2019s signature all over me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, Dan Fogelberg wrote a song a number of years ago\u2014a ballad. Part of the refrain of that song goes something like this: \u201cThe leader of the band is tired; his eyes are growing cold. His blood is in my instrument, and his song is my soul. My life is just a poor attempt to imitate the man. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI\u2019m just the living legacy to leader of the band.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy father was a grandson of a slave. He was born in 1914\u2014February 13, 1914. He was the youngest boy of 14 children. So, his grandfather Peter \/ my great grandfather was a slave. Peter, they say\u2014my dad remembers him: \u201cPeter lived to be an old man. Peter was a singing and praying man,\u201d he said. Some of my father\u2019s most vivid memories were seeing his grandfather rock back and forth on the old homestead there in Catawba County, North Carolina, a place called Newton Conover, where he would just sing and pray. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPeter was an illiterate man\u2014couldn\u2019t read \/ couldn\u2019t write\u2014but he loved Jesus, and\u2014get this\u2014he passionately loved the Word of God. The story is told \/ the legend is\u2014he would have his children and grandchildren read him familiar passages of Scripture over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over again. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe old boy had committed a lot of that to memory. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere\u2019s what I want you to catch. Despite the fact that Peter was a slave\u2014and let\u2019s not glorify slavery\u2014families were intentionally broken up. When young boys reached about 14\/15\/16 years of age, they bought a high price\u2014they were studded out, so to speak. It was not our most bright and shining moment\u2014it created a whole lot of damnable things that we are still dealing with in our culture today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut despite all of that, I don\u2019t know what happened to Peter. Peter developed a passion and a love for God and a love for his family. Because of his commitment to Jesus Christ and his commitment to his family, he forged generations of strong men, strong male leadership, and strong families. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI stand here just humbled\u2014I don\u2019t take credit for any of this. I don\u2019t know why I was born and raised in a household, where my dad showed up, and where he loved the Lord, and he loved his family, and he left his signature over us. Why wasn\u2019t I born in a situation where he wasn\u2019t there? Why wasn\u2019t I born with huge deficits in my heart and life? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd what I want to say today, and underscore before us, is that we\u2014one of my great concerns where evangelicalism is going today is that\u2014somehow or another, in our desire to become intellectually palatable, and acceptable in the marketplace of life, and to broker influences in the corridors of power, and to not be looked at as dumb and stupid Christians\u2014part of my concern is that we are wandering away from the spiritual core of who we really are and the power that\u2019s necessary and needed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDon\u2019t ever underestimate the gospel, and don\u2019t ever underestimate the power of the Spirit of God, and don\u2019t ever underestimate the power of prayer to change your life and future generations\u2014that is to be the centerpiece of parenting. It\u2019s not the quid pro quo, or the various strategies and coping mechanisms\u2014although they might be important\u2014and the tips that we get in the books that we read, and the blogs that we read, and podcasts, and that kind of thing\u2014absolutely wonderful. At the end of the day, the thing that is going to shape your future\u2014shape your family \/ help your child to make it home before dark, spiritually\u2014is a few callouses on your knees, with an open Bible, and a walk before God. That must <em>never<\/em> be forsaken. That has got to be the centerpiece of what we\u2019re really, really all about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPop always showed up. He wasn\u2019t perfect, but he was a man of <em>impeccable<\/em> integrity\u2014impeccable integrity. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy father\u2014this is not Pollyanna-ish \/ I\u2019m not revisiting history\u2014but my dad never made a promise to me or my sisters that he did not keep. Now, he may have said, \u201cSon, I will be at your ballgame,\u201d\u2014and he discovered he had to work and had to work something else out\u2014but on balance, he never made a promise that he didn\u2019t keep. His word was his bond. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>He was a little bit paranoid about showing up. In fact, I couldn\u2019t even quit a part-time job that I had as a teenager\u2014I better have a good excuse for that\u2014because he said, \u201cIf you told that man you\u2019re going to show up, you show up.\u201d And we\u2019ve kind of raised our kids the same way, especially our boys. When they were playing sports\u2014my rule around the household: \u201cIf you play, you stay. You don\u2019t quit because it\u2019s hard. You don\u2019t quit because it\u2019s difficult. You don\u2019t quit because there is a little bit of opposition. You don\u2019t quit because you don\u2019t like this situation. <em>You show up<\/em>. You finish the endurance ride.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe essence of parenting is to be a portrait of the desired destination. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe essence of parenting is not necessarily great insights and tools. The truth of the matter is that the power and the authority that we have to shape the next generation is lodged in what we model and what they <em>see<\/em> in front of us and not necessarily what we say. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, that is what the Bible is all about\u2014the Bible is into prophetic leadership; that is, if you are going to lead anything in the Scripture\u2014and this is the reason why character is so terribly important\u2014if you are going to lead anything in the Scripture, it\u2019s not about your ability to plan, and to have insights, and to line things up, and to recruit, and to develop the resources, and to think outside the box\u2014and all of these things that we celebrate today\u2014but if you are going to lead anything in the Bible\u2014<em>anything<\/em> that has God\u2019s name over it \/ anything that stewards what God wants to do from one generation to the next\u2014then you have to embrace the reality that you\u2019ve got to be the <em>portrait<\/em> of the desired destination. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s no other way! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhatever I want my children to be, they have to see it in me. They have to see me aggressively moving toward that because they were born\u2014they were born to be drawn toward what they <em>see<\/em>\u2014what they see. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, my daddy\u2014he didn\u2019t have a college degree \/ he was a salt-of-the-earth kind of person\u2014but his understanding of the Word of God, and his understanding of what it took to be the leader in his household, and what he saw from his father Milton \/ my grandfather and his great grandfather Peter, he passed on. He realized, if he didn\u2019t want his children to lie, he better not be telling a bunch of lies. He understood, if he wanted his children to be people who would stand up and look people in the eye and tell the truth and follow through on their commitments, then he had better do the same. If he wanted kids that would love their wives and husbands\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014and put them first in their lives\u2014then he better not dog out my mother and put her down or disrespect her. If he wanted us kids to go to church, then he needed to make sure that he was there, leading the way\u2014integrity, integrity, integrity. Integrity is a state of being whole \/ undivided moral predictability\u2014behavior and choices that reflect your core beliefs and convictions. That\u2019s what integrity is really all about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy dad used to say to me, as I was growing up\u2014and particularly as I was facing difficult times and, maybe, I didn\u2019t want to follow through on something; and I said I was going to do something\u2014boy, he would pull me aside and say: \u201cSon, all you have at the end of the day is what you say. That\u2019s all you have. That\u2019s all you have, and you better be good by what comes out of your mouth\u2014integrity. If you say you are this, then it needs to be reflected in how you act.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParenting is all about preparing a generation for a time that you cannot see, and that\u2019s the driving force behind all of us. One of the great benefits of suffering and one of the great benefits of Jim Crow\u2014interestingly enough, in the sovereignty of God, is they didn\u2019t have a lot of margin \/ they didn\u2019t have a lot of filler \/ they didn\u2019t have a lot of applause from the broader community. My great grandfather, my grandfather, my dad, and my uncles\u2014who grew up during Jim Crow\u2014they realized that all they had was one another, and all they had was home. They were passionate about things becoming better, and they had a vision for you doing more than what they were able to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParenting takes a look at where things <em>ought<\/em> to be, and where that child <em>could<\/em> be, and leverages the moment in history to <em>get<\/em> them there\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014that\u2019s what parenting is all about. Your child is just passing through, and our job is to point them toward God and point them toward the door\u2014that\u2019s what our responsibility is. Thank you, Jesus! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen my father was dying, back in 1995\u2014he had congestive heart failure\u2014and the last three years of his life [were] very difficult for me, because here\u2019s a man who worked hard his whole life. My father worked\u2014he usually was working more than one job and took care of his family. His great joy was being able to provide for us. To see him go downhill was just\u2014I mean, it was just gut-wrenching for me\u2014strong, yet he could barely make it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, the end was coming, and he was dying. I\u2019ll never forget this\u2014it was a poignant moment. I was standing next to his bedside; and he just looked at me in a moment of lucidity and said, \u201cBoy, I did the best I could.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said, \u201cPop, you did a great job!\u201d He said, \u201cSon, I want you to take care of your mom and your sisters.\u201d What was he doing?\u2014he was passing a torch \/ passing a baton\u2014\u201cThe race is over.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy whole life, I\u2019ve always wanted to be like him\u2014my whole life. I always wanted to <em>think<\/em> like him\u2014my whole life. I\u2019m in leadership now. I tell people all the time: \u201cYou know, my greatest lessons in leadership\u2014sorry, I mean, I should have read your blog [Laughter]; and I didn\u2019t read your book\u2014sorry! [Laughter] But my greatest lessons in leadership came from the grandson of a slave, who\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014\u201cday in and day out, and day in and day out, every day of his life\u2014showed up. When he would blow it and mess up, he\u2019d make it right.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ll tell you this quick story before I slide into 1 Kings, Chapter 2, and talk about the handoff; and I\u2019ll be done. When I was 12 years old, you know, I was a typical 12-year-old guy. I had a number of brain cramps. [Laughter] On the way to school in the spring, we would walk past this factory that made these chains. I don\u2019t know why I did this; but I was with some friends of mine\u2014we would\u2014there were some open boxes, and we stole some chains. It was like chain necklaces and stuff. We stole them and thought we had gotten away with something. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis was the absolute worse day of my life, though, because of what happened. My father used to work nights, but he rotated one evening a week that he was off. He happened to be off that evening, in the providence and sovereignty of God. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe telephone rang at the house, and it was a policewoman named Mrs. Brown. Yes; I don\u2019t want to say some things; this is being recorded. Mrs. Brown\u2014let\u2019s just say she was tough. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere was this kid by the name of Stanley that looked just like me\u2014believe it or not. I know it\u2019s impossible\u2014we could pass for twins. Well, when Mrs. Brown called the house, my mother gave the phone to my dad; and my dad\u2019s listening. As she\u2019s talking to him, he\u2019s looking at me; and I\u2019m saying, \u201cThis is not going to end well.\u201d So, she told him\u2014well, Stanley had told Mrs. Brown where to go, where she didn\u2019t need an overcoat; okay?\u2014you got that picture? She thought that I told her that. Now, I have to confess, I <em>felt<\/em> like it on a number of occasions; but I didn\u2019t do that\u2014didn\u2019t do it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPop hangs up the phone. He looks at me and said, \u201cBoy, have you lost your mind?!\u201d I was talking fast: \u201cPop, I didn\u2019t do that. I didn\u2019t disrespect\u2014 I didn\u2019t do that.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRight after that\u2014I kid you not\u2014there was a knock on the front door. He opens the door, and there were policemen there. What had happened was that my friends, who had stolen the chains\u2014and I was a part of that group\u2014told on me\u2014they had gotten caught. This was the worst night of my young life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI won\u2019t bore you with all the details of the story, but I will tell you this\u2014at the\u2014we went down to the factory and got the liver scared out of us. Pop dropped a couple of those boys off\u2014they didn\u2019t have dads in the home. When we walked into the house, I had not seen my dad cry, except for at funerals of his siblings. I\u2019ll never forget this\u2014he looked at me, and a tear began to trickle down his cheeks. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe said, \u201cSon, you hurt my heart.\u201d Then, he did a few other things to make sure my behavior would line up with the expectations. [Laughter] So \u201cYes; you weren\u2019t hurt that bad.\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat crushed me\u2014it broke me \/ it broke me. I forgot about the other exclamation mark, but the reason why it broke me is because I always wanted to be like my father; and he would not have done that! He said: \u201cSon, if you want something, you ask me. You don\u2019t ever have to steal anything. You hurt my heart.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we\u2019re going to break in here. We\u2019ve been listening to the first part of a message from our friend, Crawford Loritts, talking about the important role that his father played in marking his own life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t know that we, as parents, understand how our example, our model, our words, our actions\u2014they are indelibly imprinting things on the hearts and minds of our children\u2014things that will live with them for decades. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And turn them from doing what\u2019s wrong\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014to do what\u2019s right. I know we\u2019ve been talking about the power of a dad, who has integrity; but moms are powerful too, as well, Bob. I just want to encourage moms and dads today to assume your office\u2014the great privilege of being a dad and a mom\u2014to assume it with integrity and to make sure that your words \/ as much as possible that your words match up with your life. In other words, you do what you say you\u2019re going to do\u2014you fulfil your promises. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI look back on my dad, and my dad didn\u2019t need a bunch of lawyers to be tied up to make sure he fulfilled his promises. All you needed from my dad was a handshake, and it was good. If he gave his word, he was going to do it. Bob, I don\u2019t know who I would be today if I had not observed a man, who came from a broken home\u2014my dad\u2019s father abandoned his eight children back in a time when it wasn\u2019t culturally acceptable in anyway whatsoever\u2014yet, my dad was not a victim. My dad earned his living and grew up within three miles of the log cabin where he was born, and he died with a good name. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can just say to you, as a listener: \u201cOne of the greatest gifts you will give your children is that of a good name\u2014a father \/ a mother, who lived out what he or she believes in front of your children. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cThere\u2019s a great need for that as never before.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, we\u2019re about six or seven weeks, now, from releasing a resource that we have been working on for more than a year now that, actually, Crawford\u2019s son, Bryan, and his daughter-in-law, Korie, are a part of. It\u2019s a video series called FamilyLife\u2019s <em>Art of Parenting<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup>, eight sessions that you can go through in a small group; or there is going to be a digital experience of <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>, something you can go through as a couple, online. All of this is designed to help moms and dads understand what the biblical priorities for parenting ought to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, we\u2019re kicking all of this off with a movie that\u2019s going to be in theaters for two nights only\u2014May 1<sup>st<\/sup> and May 3<sup>rd<\/sup>\u2014a movie we\u2019ve produced called <em>Like Arrows<\/em>\u2014got help with this from our friends, Alex and Stephen Kendrick. Alex has a role in the film, and it\u2019s all designed to raise the issue of parenting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe really want to begin a movement of intentional parenting in our culture, and that\u2019s what these resources are all about. You can find out more about what\u2019s coming when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the parenting link you see there. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me also mention\u2014Dr. Crawford Loritts has written a book about his father\u2014a book called <em>Never Walk Away: Lessons on Integrity from a Father Who Lived It<\/em>. It\u2019s a book that we have in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order the book from us, online, as well, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I mentioned this new emphasis on parenting\u2014one of the things we are working on is a strategy to get this material into the hands and hearts of people who don\u2019t listen to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014folks who may not be actively involved in a local church\u2014but people who would be open to understanding what the Bible teaches about how we raise the next generation. We believe there are a lot of folks like that. We are developing strategies, right now, that will help us get this material into their hands. We\u2019ve calculated\u2014it\u2019s going to take us $10 a home to be able to reach someone with this content and get them engaged with what they\u2019re hearing. Of course, they\u2019ll have the chance to hear the gospel as we do that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>We\u2019d love to ask you to help support the work that we\u2019re doing to help us reach more people with God\u2019s design for marriage and family. It\u2019s easy enough to do. You can donate, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY. When you get in touch with us and make a donation, as a way of saying, \u201cThank you,\u201d we want to send you seven prayer cards. These are designed so that you, as a parent or grandparent, can be praying more purposefully\/more intentionally for your children or your grandchildren. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey tuck right into your Bible\u2014they are our gift to you when you donate to help us reach more folks with practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. We look forward to hearing from you, and thanks for your partnership with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you\u2019ll join us back tomorrow when we are, again, going to hear from Dr. Crawford Loritts about the priorities of parents. I hope you can tune in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> of Little Rock, Arkansas; \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/300173","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300173"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300173"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300173"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300173"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=300173"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=300173"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=300173"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}