{"id":300123,"date":"2018-01-18T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-01-18T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/secrets-of-the-mediterranean\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:19","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:19","slug":"secrets-of-the-mediterranean","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/secrets-of-the-mediterranean\/","title":{"rendered":"Secrets of the Mediterranean"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: Steve and Misty Arterburn | Series: The Mediterranean Love Plan | Want your marriage to be more passionate? Best-selling authors Steve and Misty Arterburn share some secrets for better &#8220;amore&#8221; that folks in the Mediterranean have known for centuries. Backed by research, the Arterburns tell of practical ways to connect with your spouse, including listening, being present, touching, savoring food, and enjoying the surrounding beauty, especially of your wife.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Want your marriage to be more passionate? Steve and Misty Arterburn share some secrets for better &#8220;amore&#8221; that folks in the Mediterranean have known for centuries.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-01-18.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:25:24","filesize":"23.25M","filesize_raw":"24381392","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2810,2901,2088],"tags":[4194,2877,4196,4195],"podcast_series":[7186],"cwp_profile":[3288],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300123","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-growing-spiritually","category-husbands","category-romance-and-sex","tag-connect-with-your-spouse","tag-marriage","tag-quality-time","tag-rekindle-the-flame","podcast_series-the-mediterranean-love-plan","cwp_profile-steve-and-misty-arterburn","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300123\/secrets-of-the-mediterranean","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300123\/secrets-of-the-mediterranean","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"wA49GR7Dr8\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/secrets-of-the-mediterranean\/\">Secrets of the Mediterranean<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/secrets-of-the-mediterranean\/embed\/#?secret=wA49GR7Dr8\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Secrets of the Mediterranean&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"wA49GR7Dr8\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Want your marriage to be more passionate? Steve and Misty Arterburn share some secrets for better \"amore\" that folks in the Mediterranean have known for centuries.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-01-18.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Couch time was ten uninterrupted minutes, just me and her on the couch. As soon as we started to do this, the kids were right there, wanting to get\u2014sit in our lap, climb in between the two of us\u2014and we used to have to say: \u201cNo; Mom and Dad are having couch time. You need to go play.\u201d They got such security\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014from us sending them away so Mom and Dad could have couch time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It was more important, I think, for her, in the middle of her day, to reconnect \/ to attune than I realized it was for me; but she <em>desperately<\/em> needed that linking up \/ that syncing up\u2014just ten minutes of: \u201cTell me about your day,\u201d \u201cTell me about your day.\u201d \u201cHow are you doing? How are you feeling?\u201d Then, we could go into the evening in great shape. It was just great wisdom on her part. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> What I\u2019ve found was\u2014as she was working with me on attuning with her\u2014and I observed her with our children\u2014I really believe I got in tune with our kids for the first time rather than just: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0\u201cI\u2019m the adult; they\u2019re the kids,\u201d and \u201cI\u2019ll do what I want to do.\u201d I started to listen and look in their eyes. She\u2019s the one that said to me, \u201cWhen you look into the eyes of our children, you are downloading love, eyeball to eyeball; and you can\u2019t do it any other way.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOh my goodness! I think that\u2019s why our kids are amazingly secure, wonderful, creative kids; because of that influence she\u2019s had on them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I heard a story, years ago, about a dad, sitting at the breakfast table, reading the newspaper. His little six-year-old daughter was talking, as six-years-olds do, about <em>nothing<\/em>\u2014just talking about making up a story\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014you know, whatever. Dad was just reading the newspaper, doing: \u201cMm-hmm,\u201d \u201cMm-hmm,\u201d \u201cMm-hmm.\u201d She came over in the middle of that; and she slapped that paper out of his hand, grabbed his cheeks, and said, \u201cListen with your face.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Yes; there you go. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019ve shared that at marriage conferences, throughout the years, because a lot of husbands and wives are not listening with their face\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014they\u2019re not looking at each other \/ they\u2019re not talking in that kind of communication. They\u2019re talking while they look at the TV screen or while they\u2019re driving in the car. They\u2019re just not connecting \/ they\u2019re not attuning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think one of the reasons why couples get so much out of our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways is because we give them the gift of a weekend away together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We give them the gift of what you\u2019re talking about\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Attunement; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014attunement\u2014and you give them the chance to be face to face. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf 93 percent of all communication is non-verbal, that means 93 percent of all the communication, occurring between you and your spouse is, as we\u2019ve been talking about\u2014it\u2019s the eyes;\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014it\u2019s gestures; it\u2019s the face; it\u2019s the smile; it\u2019s the attention\u2014and be transfixed with your spouse. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> It\u2019s making space to just hold that person in attention and care. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that a lot of times for us, as adults, it\u2019s hard for us if we didn\u2019t experience that, as children. When we\u2019re listened to, as a child, we\u2019re much better equipped, as an adult, to do that; but a lot of us face that challenge in adulthood to just really learn, and grow up again, and \u201cWhat does it mean to really hold space for another person?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> We share some of the secrets from the Italian culture\u2014that they touch the other person when they are talking. They move their hands, and they touch ten times more than we do in the United States. Well, if you\u2019re touching someone, you\u2019re kind of demanding that they be engaged with you; and they have the ability to truly get into each other\u2019s hearts and souls. That\u2019s what we\u2019re encouraging people to do: \u201cGo deep inside and find out what\u2019s really there.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Okay; you\u2019ve got seven of these\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014secrets. I want both of you to pick your favorite, other than attunement. I have a feeling\u2014as much as you\u2019ve talked about here\u2014that may be your number one. I know which one is Bob\u2019s\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it\u2019s the food\u2014[Laughter]\u2014savoring food. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Now, come on. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This would be his idea\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Come on. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014of how you connect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Well, it\u2019s a pretty good way to do it! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was going to say, \u201cThat\u2019s not fair,\u201d but that\u2019s actually perfectly fair; okay? [Laughter] I mean, I might vote for food; but we get to hear: \u201cDo you have a favorite in your top seven?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Why don\u2019t you start? What would you say, Honey? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes; probably beauty\u2014I really like for us to be out in nature and appreciating creation and stillness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How does that connect the two of you if you\u2019re on a hike in the woods? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes; well, there\u2019s so much chaos. We\u2019ve got five children; we have our individual lives\u2014all the challenges we\u2019re facing\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Hold it. You have an individual life with five children? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes, not much of one. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Every now and then. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Well, that\u2019s not easy, actually; but yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s amazing to be out and to get into something bigger than myself. I just\u2014I can get so wrapped up in all that I\u2019m juggling and doing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I\u2019m near a mountain, or on a mountain or the ocean\u2014something bigger than myself\u2014that reminds me: \u201cOh, there is a Creator.\u201d Or I can see those stars\u2014and they\u2019re a million miles away\u2014it helps me humble down and get reconnected with my husband and our God\u2014that there is a sovereignty there \/ it\u2019s not me; you know? I don\u2019t have to keep everything spinning; God\u2019s doing that for us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> If Barbara were here, she would be saying: \u201cI agree, sister. I\u2019m in this with you.\u201d [Laughter] She loves beauty. In fact, she\u2019s got me reading a book\u2014still haven\u2019t finished it\u2014it\u2019s called <em>The Evidential Power of Beauty<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Oh, wow; what a title! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s all about how beauty is an apologetic for truth and that God exists\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014because there is symmetry with beauty; there is order. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That demands someone\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> \u2014a Creator. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; a Creator who designed it. What about you, Stephen? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Well, let me just comment on this; because, you know, we talk in the book about the beauty of a woman and a man truly appreciating and communicating pure appreciation for pure beauty\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014not the objectified woman or just the depersonalized person\u2014but a woman has a very unique beauty that a man simply doesn\u2019t have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are into pornography and all of those kinds of things that we hear so much about, you\u2019re not going to be able to appreciate that; and you\u2019re not going to be able to communicate it. So, she is going to be looking for an affirmation of her beauty. You know, as Job said: \u201cI made a covenant with my eyes not to look upon the other women.\u201d The less you look upon anybody else, the more beautiful she\u2019s going to become. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I\u2019d have to say, you know, certainly, the sacred and the sexual is a highlight of this book at the end\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I thought you\u2019d go for that. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> That\u2019s bold. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> \u2014but my favorite is being playful. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy wife and I\u2014we dance. We\u2019ll dance anywhere. We take dance lessons, and there\u2019s just hardly a downside to dancing. I was raised Southern Baptist. So, I\u2019m recovering as I learn to dance. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut this playfulness \/ this humor that you need to have in your relationship\u2014we have a common humor. We <em>love<\/em> to laugh, and we bring that to our kids. I often say: \u201cLet\u2019s always look for the Lord in something. Let\u2019s look for the lesson, and let\u2019s don\u2019t forget to find the laughter that\u2019s there.\u201d We\u2019re a very playful family, but we <em>love<\/em> to do playful things. We love to create stories, plays\u2014whatever it is\u2014and I just\u2014my personality is: \u201cI need a break,\u201d and \u201cI love to have fun.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Can you be intentional about that? I\u2019m sitting here, thinking, \u201cIf I were to go home tonight and say, \u2018We ought to laugh tonight,\u2019\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Yes; I will tell you how to do that, and we do it in the book. I would say, \u201cGo online and look at Brian Regan videos,\u201d\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014he\u2019s a clean comedian. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> And we have\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> \u2014pretty clean. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> I mean, pretty clean; and he\u2019s just hilarious; or look at\u2014we watch <em>Elf<\/em> about six times throughout the year. [Laughter] We watch <em>Groundhog Day<\/em>. Find\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; I was thinking, \u201c<em>What About Bob?<\/em>\u201d That was on my list of things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> You do need external sources sometimes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You would make Mary Ann watch <em>What About Bob?<\/em> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Mary Ann would make <em>me<\/em> watch <em>What About Bob?<\/em> Mary Ann likes that and <em>Elf<\/em>. So, yes; I know exactly what you\u2019re talking about. You do need\u2014it\u2019s not like you can sit down tonight and say, \u201cOkay; let\u2019s make each other laugh\u201d; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> No. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> No; but if you go home\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> I mean, sometimes you can; but sometimes, you\u2019re really hurting; and we just do\u2014we need a break. We do need a break. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Our 11- and 8-year-old\u2014they know four different adult card games. So, we play cards. We\u2019re all laughing together, eventually, over \/ sometimes, we cry over the games. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> You cry; no, I cry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> I think it\u2019s a matter of saying: \u201cI\u2019m not going to go home and sit in a Barcalounger or La-Z-Boy and watch TV. I\u2019m going to do something that\u2019s going to engage my family, and let\u2019s create a memory here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cLet\u2019s have something that\u2019s fun.\u201d When you decide to make that the priority, things come about. You <em>find<\/em> the things that the family enjoys the most. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> That\u2019s so true, and it\u2019s easy to isolate when we\u2019re in pain too. The other thing that playfulness does is\u2014it just invites connection. When we have a shared laughter, we\u2019re agreeing on something. That takes away the aloneness, and it\u2019s got a lot of good effect to that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Steve:<\/strong> We apply, in our family, what I learned in preaching. I am a teaching pastor, and I\u2019m known as the sarcastic pastor because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What a surprise! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> \u2014if a congregation\u2014if you can make them laugh\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> \u2014then, they literally are all <em>agreeing<\/em> together \/ it\u2019s a bonding thing. It\u2019s a bonding moment at home when everybody decides, \u201cThis is really funny.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Don\u2019t they call you the stunt pastor? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> The stunt pastor\u2014that is true. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You do stunts too?! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> I have a few. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014from the pulpit?! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Every now and then. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Wow; we might have you do one, here on the radio. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> How would that work? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> I don\u2019t know, but I can tell you about it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I want to tell you about playfulness. I want to read you a piece of literature at this point: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI am my beloveds, and his desire is for me. Come my beloved. Let us go out into the fields and lodge in the villages. Let us go out early to the vineyards and see whether the vines have budded, whether the grape blossoms have opened, and the pomegranates are in bloom. There, I will give you my love. The mandrakes give forth fragrance and beside our doors are all choice fruits\u2014new as well as old\u2014which I have laid up for you. O my beloved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014Song of Solomon. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was hearing food all over that \/ you were finding playfulness. That was all about <em>food<\/em>, from what I was\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> \u2014and beauty. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. Well, that\u2019s true\u2014beauty, food, and playfulness. You put the three together. We\u2019re getting potent now; aren\u2019t we? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Misty:<\/strong> Seriously. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This is a picnic like none other\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I\u2019m telling you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve:<\/strong> Well, I can tell you is: \u201cWhat a way to play.\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> There you go! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019d encourage couples to get a copy of your book, <em>The Mediterranean Love Plan<\/em>, and get some coaching on how to play. The book is one we\u2019ve got in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center\u2014<em>The Mediterranean Love Plan: 7 Secrets to Lifelong Passion in Marriage<\/em>. Order from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order a copy of the book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you get in touch with us, why don\u2019t you plan an extended picnic \/ a time away at one of our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways\u2014Friday night to Sunday\u2014the two of you in a fun, romantic getaway setting, where you can learn more about God\u2019s design for marriage. Sign up this week or next week, and you save 50 percent off the regular registration fee. That offer will expire next weekend. Today is the day to go online, get more information, register online; or call if you have questions, and you can register over the phone. The website: FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCall 1-800-FL-TODAY and plan to invest, this spring, in your marriage. We\u2019re going to be in more than 50 cities across the country. Get the details and join us at a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue to look at the elements that make for lifelong passion in a marriage relationship. Our guests, Steve and Misty Arterburn, will be back with us. I hope you can be back as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. 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