{"id":300097,"date":"2019-03-22T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2019-03-22T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/finding-success-in-the-workplace\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:17","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:17","slug":"finding-success-in-the-workplace","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/finding-success-in-the-workplace\/","title":{"rendered":"Finding Success in the Workplace"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: Josh Burnette, Pete Hardesty | Series: Adulting 101 | Chick-fil-A operator Josh Burnette and Young Life leader Pete Hardesty want young men to find success in the workplace. In order to see that happen, young men have to learn the value of hard work, punctuality, and responsibility. Burnette and Hardesty tell how they can get there.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Josh Burnette and Pete Hardesty want young men to find success in the workplace. In order to see that happen, young men have to learn the value of hard work, punctuality, and responsibility.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"Josh Burnette and Pete Hardesty want young men to find success in the workplace by learning the value of hard work, punctuality, and responsibility.","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-03-22.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:32:27","filesize":"29.72M","filesize_raw":"31161404","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2856,2835,2855],"tags":[4155,4156,4157],"podcast_series":[7179],"cwp_profile":[8807,8808],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300097","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adult-children","category-raising-boys","category-teens","tag-adulting","tag-becoming-adults","tag-life-skills","podcast_series-adulting-101","cwp_profile-josh-burnette","cwp_profile-pete-hardesty","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300097\/finding-success-in-the-workplace","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300097\/finding-success-in-the-workplace","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"iHipjocUiw\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/finding-success-in-the-workplace\/\">Finding Success in the Workplace<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/finding-success-in-the-workplace\/embed\/#?secret=iHipjocUiw\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Finding Success in the Workplace&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"iHipjocUiw\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-03-22.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-03-22.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, March 22<sup>nd<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. How do we, as parents, help make sure our children are ready to manage their money as they move into adulthood? We\u2019ll talk with Pete Hardesty and Josh Burnette about that today. Stay with us.\n\nAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. One of the things that, Dave, you like to talk to men about is the need for them to step up to be men. You\u2019re really talking to them about what we\u2019ve been talking about this week, which is taking responsibility for their actions and their lives\u2014not being passive\u2014but owning what they need to be responsible for.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes, going from boyhood to manhood\u2014I think it\u2019s a huge leap\u2014it always has been; but in our culture, it\u2019s like, \u201cWhat is a man?\u201d It could be said: \u201cWhat is a woman?\u201d \u201cWhen does that happen?\u2014when do you become an adult?\u201d This book really does help define that for men and women: \u201cWhat does an adult man\/woman look like?\u201d\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The book you\u2019re talking about is <em>Adulting 101<\/em>\u2014the book we\u2019ve been talking about, this week, by Josh Burnette and Pete Hardesty.\n\nGuys, welcome back. Good to have you guys here.\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Thank you.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> Thanks for having us.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Josh and Pete come at this subject from two different perspectives. Josh is a Chick-fil-A<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> owner\/operator, working with a lot of employees who are in that adulting stage of life\u2014high school\/college-age kids and young adults. Pete has been involved with the ministry of Young Life<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, which\u2014by the way, I shared with you\u2014my wife came to faith through Young Life. I was a volunteer leader for six years. We have great respect for the work that Young Life is doing and are grateful for the ministry you have on high school campuses and with college kids.\n\nYou talk about this being something, Dave, that both men and women have to deal with. I was just curious, Ann: \u201cDo women need to step up too?\u201d I mean, I don\u2019t hear that kind of a rally cry and charge given to women the way I hear it often given to men.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Well, I think it\u2019s a little different for women. I think the difference is that women struggle with control, probably, more than men do. I was listening to you guys, as we\u2019ve been talking about this, this week. I\u2019ve realized that\u2014as a mother or as Mom and my perspective\u2014I struggle more with giving up the control of my kids as they <em>become<\/em> adults. I can see myself stepping in to say, \u201cHey, do you need me to write your resume?\u201d [Laughter] I think moms can struggle with that piece more than the stepping up piece. It\u2019s almost like, maybe, we need to step <em>back<\/em>.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; so let\u2019s dive into, really, what\u2019s at the heart of adulting. As we\u2019ve been talking about this week\u2014is the whole idea of taking responsibility for your life\/owning responsibility. What we see in the culture a lot today is people who, when something goes wrong, their first impulse is to look somewhere else and find: \u201cThe reason it went wrong is because somebody did this,\u201d or \u201c\u2026because I didn\u2019t have this advantage,\u201d or to start to find blame outside of themselves.\n\nYou guys are saying a big part of adulting is to say, \u201cI\u2019ve got to own, at least, my part of the fails that I experience in life\u201d; right?\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Absolutely. The genesis of this book really came about because of the erosion of learning how to adult well in the home. As I witnessed that as an employer\u2014and then, not really receiving these same life skills at school\u2014a lot of young people are looking to their employer to help mature and turn them into an adult.\n\nI was having these conversations that I had with my father; but now, as an employer. As these conversations were happening more and more frequently around purchasing a vehicle, or moving out, or time-management, that is what propelled <em>this<\/em> to come into being.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> One of my friends, who is a young person, said this quote: \u201cBeing an adult is exactly like a birthday party; except, when the pi\u00f1ata breaks open, it\u2019s full of bills and big scary decisions. [Laughter] It\u2019s trouble.\u201d Another one said: \u201cI\u2019m really glad I learned about parallelograms instead of how to do taxes. It\u2019s really come in handy this parallelogram season.\u201d [Laughter]\n\nSo, I think there\u2019s blame to go around and how our society and culture has changed. You know, I think that there are a lot of places to look; but I do think what we talked about earlier is that childish ways are a focus on yourself\u2014focus on self\/being selfish. Then, when you grow up to be an adult, you start to be others-centered. When you start to really grow and learn\u2014I think to serve others could be the most important part of learning how to adult.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; yes.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> I remember that one of the big lessons I learned\u2014and I was so grateful to one of my mentors, named Bill\u2014around time-management and around self-importance was\u2014we would meet any time. This was when I was in college. It was on a Thanksgiving or Christmas break; and we met at the mall, where he would be walking. He was in his 70\u2019s at that time. He would go walk for a couple miles, and then we\u2019d join\u2014meet for lunch.\n\nI was 20 minutes late, and I rushed in\u2014maybe, even 25. I sat down. He just looked me in the eyes; and he said, \u201cPete, are you late a lot?\u201d I said, \u201cYes; I am.\u201d He said, \u201cYou know what you are saying to people when you are late?\u201d I thought, \u201cUh-oh.\u201d I said: \u201cI\u2019m really busy. I\u2019ve got a lot of stuff to do.\u201d He said, \u201cNo.\u201d Then, his voice got raised up a lot louder. I had <em>never<\/em> heard this from my mentor, Bill. He said, \u201cWhat you\u2019re saying,\u201d\u2014he stood up and said [fast talking and raised voice]\u2014\u201c\u2019Whatever you\u2019ve got to do is more important than whatever I\u2019ve got to do. You\u2019re saying you are more important than <em>me<\/em>.\u2019\u201d I remember looking around, and everybody is looking at us.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Wow.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> I thought, \u201cOh my gosh!\u201d Then, he just sat back down and said, \u201cSo, how has college been? [Laughter] How\u2019s the first semester of your sophomore year?\u201d\n\nI\u2019ll <em>never<\/em> forget that, because it made me realize that time-management is actually a piece of how we treat <em>other<\/em> people. It\u2019s not just getting our stuff together; it\u2019s not just \u201cYou\u2019re disorganized,\u201d\u2014it\u2019s a priority. You either have a priority for yourself and getting done or you\u2019re not making others a priority to whatever you are going to. That\u2019s just one aspect we cover.\n\nWe have a couple of chapters on time-management in the book as far as how to maximize our time\/how to get the most out of every day; because time is the one thing that all of us have the same amount of, and I think God will want us to do the right things with our time.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I remember, when our kids were in high school, some of our kids were better at this than others; but we had some\u2014who would look at a deadline for a school project or a paper; and they knew, if they turned it in late, they would lose a letter grade\u2014they would make the value choice of: \u201cI would rather have the time and procrastinate and lose the letter grade than to get this in on time.\u201d As a parent, it\u2019s driving you crazy. And most of the time, they knew, \u201cIf I turn this in on time, I\u2019m good enough in this class, I can get an \u2018A\u2019 on that paper.\u201d\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> How did <em>you<\/em> respond to that?\u2014and Mary Ann?\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; so we talked to them about value and priorities and about the fact that, in real life, sometimes, it\u2019s not the difference between whether you get an \u201cA\u201d or a \u201cB.\u201d It\u2019s the difference between whether you succeed or fail. That\u2019s why being on time was more of a priority than they were making it; they didn\u2019t listen to that. [Laughter] I mean, there was <em>nothing<\/em> that we said that they would: \u201cOh, man, you know, Mom\/Dad, you are really right. I need to be more\u2026\u201d\n\nHere is the other thing I remember. We had one child, who would set his alarm to get up in the morning. No matter how loud he set it, he could sleep right through that alarm. There was this regular practice of coming down at 8:30; school started at 8:15. He comes down at 8:30 and said, \u201cI never heard the alarm.\u201d Then, you are faced with that dilemma: \u201cWhat do you do, as a parent? Do you take them late? Do you say, \u2018Walk to school\u2019? Do you say, \u2018You stay home today\u2019?\u201d I\u2019m thinking, \u201cHe\u2019s going to be in college next year, and there\u2019s nobody around to handle this for him.\u201d\n\nThese are the kinds of time-management\/personal responsibility issues that kids have to confront, at some point, and go, \u201cIf I\u2019m going to be an adult, I have to take ownership of this.\u201d\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes; here\u2019s a question I have, Pete. When you were sharing that story\u2014I mean, Bob\u2019s the parent, speaking to this\u2014and we\u2019re doing the same thing\u2014you had a guy raise his voice and tell you what it meant when you\u2019re late. So, talk to the person, who is <em>that<\/em> guy. When do we make the decision, \u201cI\u2019m going to speak truth, <em>hard<\/em>, to help them become an adult; because they need to hear it\u201d? It changed your life. I mean, it was like\u2014maybe, your parents had said it to you before; but that guy, that day, was a turning point.\n\nI want to be that guy in somebody else\u2019s life. I don\u2019t think that\u2019s my gift to the world. I\u2019m supposed to speak the truth to everybody; but every once in a while, it\u2019s like: \u201cMan, should I say this to Pete? I don\u2019t know,\u201d\u2014I\u2019m wrestling with it. Yet, he had the courage to say it; and it changed your life. You\u2019re writing a book that has some of those truths in it, because one man spoke that to you. So, talk to a person about: \u201cHow do I make this decision as to whether I speak truth or I just keep it to myself?\u201d\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> Dave, that\u2014you bring up a great point. For us to speak truth to people, I think we have to have earned the right.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> He did. He met with me pretty regularly for <em>years<\/em> before he chose to exercise that right to speak to me in that way and have it be that memorable. The other thing, I think, is people really need to know that we have their best interests in mind; so I knew that\u2014I knew that about him. It doesn\u2019t mean that I accept everything; sometimes, that\u2019s hard, especially for family.\n\nThe other thing\u2014I think if you\u2019re a young person, you need to be looking for mentors. You might have the best mom and dad in the world; but we need a\u2014studies have shown\u2014we need a constellation of mentors. If we put all our eggs in one basket\u2014a man or a woman\u2014they\u2019re imperfect, because everybody is imperfect; they are going to let us down in some ways.\n\nAnd not everybody is\u2014to have a constellation of mentors, everybody brings something to the table. I have something to learn from everybody, and I feel like I bring something that might be of value to everyone. I think, looking outside of the home\u2014and you might\u2014a lot of times, if you are blessed with a great mom or dad, that main mentor can be in the home, which is great; but even outside of that, every mom and dad is imperfect. So, I think\u2014if you\u2019re a mom or dad\u2014to encourage your children to have mentors that are besides you. They can learn all kinds of different things from them.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Dave and I did that with our own kids\u2014in terms of we <em>prayed<\/em> for those mentors. We were always amazed that we would say these things to try to equip our sons and: \u201cThis is what you should do\u2026\u201d \/ \u201cThis is a great idea\u2026\u201d and they\u2019d kind of blow it off; but then, some man came into their life and said the same thing\u2014like, \u201cThis is <em>amazing<\/em>.\u201d Dave and I are like, \u201cWe been saying that for years!\u201d [Laughter]\n\nYet, we prayed so diligently that God would bring men into their lives; and God was faithful to do that. I believe that was one of the big changing points for each one of our sons\u2014is the men who poured into them.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> One of the things that you talk about in your book, <em>Adulting 101<\/em>, is taking responsibility for employment\/getting a job. Now, a lot of high school kids today\u2014their life is already over-crowded. Do you think it\u2019s smart for parents to clear out some things so that the kids work during their high school years?\u2014or is that something that is just going to be an unnecessary distraction? I\u2019m talking to a Chick-fil-A owner\/operator. I think I know what your answer is going to be; right? [Laughter]\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Yes; absolutely. I started working when I was 14 to an employer, which was Chick-fil-A as well. What I learned in the workplace was so invaluable from, again, an interpersonal relationship skill set. That what they have an opportunity to learn\u2014and they don\u2019t need to work 40 hours a week to glean those skills, especially, as a young adult\u2014but having somebody else, outside of the family, that they are responsible to and beginning to learn those building blocks, while they are still in high school, produces tremendous results in college and beyond.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Did that mean you couldn\u2019t play soccer, or you couldn\u2019t be in the school play, or whatever?\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> There are different seasons of time. There was still an opportunity to be engaged in sports and engaged in school; but also, I could still work on the weekends; or maybe, I could work one or two nights a week. So, again, it wasn\u2019t a full-time employment; but I had the opportunity to still learn from my time at Chick-fil-A.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> It\u2019s crazy to think\u2014because I\u2019ve talked to so many parents that\u2014like Bob just said: \u201cI don\u2019t want my son or daughter to miss the school play,\u201d or \u201c\u2026the sports team. So, I\u2019m going to give them an allowance. I\u2019m going to give them money, so they can live.\u201d I think that\u2019s the wrong perspective\u2014I really do\u2014because it\u2019s like: \u201cOh my gosh. Life is about learning to be an adult.\u201d\n\nThat\u2019s what your book does\u2014I got your book and read it. I thought: \u201cOh my gosh. Every parent should be handing this book to somebody to help their child, because this stuff\u2026\u201d I learned stuff about being an adult in your book. [Laughter] I didn\u2019t know what life insurance was about; I didn\u2019t know how to invest. I mean, it\u2019s so practical: \u201cGet a job,\u201d \u201cHow to do car payments,\u201d\u2014all that stuff.\n\nI\u2019m like: \u201cI <em>failed<\/em>, as a parent. I didn\u2019t teach many of those things.\u201d Yet, here it is, as a tool to hand to a parent or anybody and say, \u201cHere you go. You want something to walk somebody through?\u2014here it is.\u201d They are going to eat it up.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Pete, one of the other areas that you talk about, as you help kids get ready for adulthood\/learn how to adult, is how to manage money. This is something\u2014I remember a call from one of our kids, at college, who had apparently figured out a way, in spite of my knowing about it, to get a credit card and had figured out a way to charge something\u2014a lot of somethings\u2014on that credit card without me knowing about it. All of a sudden, this child was in trouble with that credit card.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Ooh; I would have liked to have heard that conversation. [Laughter]\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And that was\u2014it was quite a conversation; but it was a part of that child\u2019s adulting experience to say: \u201cWe\u2019re going to sit down and figure out\u2014now, here\u2019s the hole you got yourself into. How\u2019s this hole feel? Is this a hole you\u2019d like to be in very often? Now, I\u2019ll help you figure out, \u2018How do we dig out of the hole?\u2019\u201d I did not want the 18 percent interest that was attached to that credit card any more than the child wanted it, but I also didn\u2019t want to just solve the problem for the child.\n\nThat\u2019s where I think a lot of parents make a mistake\u2014is not letting their kids experience some of the consequences of poor money choices or poor time choices. You don\u2019t let them feel what it\u2019s like to lack responsibility\u2014you cover that up for them\u2014and they never feel the sting of a bad choice.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> That\u2019s actually the biggest topic in the book; I think we have four chapters on it. One of the big principles it starts with is: \u201cMoney won\u2019t make you happy, but mismanagement of money will make you miserable.\u201d It\u2019s not like that\u2019s the secret sauce that\u2014if we get enough money, we\u2019ll be really happy\u2014but if you don\u2019t take care of it \/ if you don\u2019t learn some good habits around money, it can be disastrous. It can really affect your quality of life for going on.\n\nThe other big principle that our chapters are written from is that: \u201cAll the money in the world is God\u2019s. Every dollar in everybody\u2019s pocket\u2014every peso, every yen, every shekel\u2014is all God\u2019s; so all we\u2019re doing is being stewards of it.\u201d So, the question is: \u201cHow are you going to steward this money?\u201d It comes back to \u201cNaked we come; naked we go.\u201d\n\nI\u2019ve been to a lot of funerals. I\u2019ve never seen one, where there is a lot of money\u2014like, in the coffin\u2014stuffed around somebody laying there. You know, everybody leaves the same amount of money behind when they die\u2014all of it\u2014so how are you going to take care of it while you are here?\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I heard a pastor one time say, \u201cWhen it comes to the issue of giving, the question is not: \u2018How much of my money am I going to give to God\u2019s work?\u2019 It is: \u2018How much of God\u2019s money am I going to keep for myself?\u2019\u201d\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> When you reposition the question that way, all of a sudden, it does change your perspective and go: \u201cOh, yes; this money is God\u2019s money. Now, the question is: \u2018How much do I spend on myself, and how much do I spend on other things that matter to me, like advancing the Kingdom?\u2019\u201d\u2014which really brings us to where you guys wrap up the book.\n\nYou wrap up the book with what is the ultimate issue as children move from childhood to adulthood. They can master every part of this book; but if they get this last part wrong, there is a problem; isn\u2019t there?\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> Yes, Bob; the book is about how to succeed in life. It\u2019s written from a perspective that there are certain realities in our life that God has set up in our world; so for example, one of them is: \u201cYou reap what you sow,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s not just agriculturally; that\u2019s, also, financially; it\u2019s, also, relationally. There are a lot of things that are set up, in reality, that the more we learn and live into that, the better our lives get\u2014the better we get at life, and the better our lives will be.\n\nBut we can do a lot things right and miss the big picture. Josh and I went, back and forth; and we thought about this and talked about it a lot. We thought, \u201cWe don\u2019t want to write a success manual for life and leave out the biggest part; because people will be missing out on true, full life.\u201d Jesus is that great, and following Him is what we were made to do.\n\nSo, really, this book can work for any young person, no matter what their\u2014you know, wherever they are in their spiritual journey, and no matter what they think about God, Jesus, faith\u2014because at the very end, we kind of give a very winsome view of who Jesus is and what He has\u2014the reason He came and what He has to offer in this life.\n\nBut there is no real other mention of the Bible\u2014even though it all comes from God\u2019s truth and every\u2014you could almost retitle each chapter, you know: \u201cA Christian Ethic on Finances\u201d; \u201cA Christian Ethic on Sex and Dating\u201d; \u201cA Christian Ethic on Professionalism.\u201d But we wanted it to be relevant for every single person, no matter what they thought, and so to come at it with an open mind.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes; I loved how you did that. As I read through the book, I\u2019m thinking, as a parent\u2014even as an older adult; I won\u2019t give my age, trying to still be an adult\u2014I\u2019m like: \u201cMan! Oh, man! This is incredibly wise counsel that nobody gets on practical life skills; and yet, anybody could read it.\u201d An atheist could read it and get incredible wisdom from it. Then, at the very end, it is almost like you go: \u201cIf you want to know where this came from, watch this. This is all from the most popular, best-selling book every written called the Bible.\u201d\n\nAnn and I speak at corporations, sometimes, about marriage and relationships. They tell us, \u201cYou can\u2019t mention Jesus.\u201d People come up afterwards and go, \u201cWhere did you get that stuff?!\u201d We\u2019re like, \u201cWell, it\u2019s in the Bible.\u201d They\u2019re like: \u201cWhat?! You\u2019ve got to be kidding me.\u201d So, it\u2019s the same thing here\u2014it\u2019s like: \u201cThat\u2019s\u201d\u2014this whole book, like you said, could be a biblical treatise on success; yet, you did it in such a compelling way. Really, the way you did at the end of the chapter\u2014way to go! A parent could hand this to a son, who says: \u201cI want nothing to do with church. I want nothing to do with God.\u201d They\u2019d still get a <em>ton<\/em> out of this book; and at the end, they\u2019d be drawn to go, \u201cHmm, maybe, I should know the Author of all these great truths.\u201d Good job.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I would think, if you had a high school junior or senior, as a mom or a dad, to start going, chapter by chapter, through this book with them\u2014\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I <em>love<\/em> that idea.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014<em>great<\/em> preparation. If you\u2019ve got a son or a daughter, who is in college\u2014to just give them this as a gift; but I\u2019d give it to them as a gift and say, \u201cI\u2019ll pay you $100 if I get a book report on this after you\u2019ve read it.\u201d\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Would you do that?\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I would\u2014not for your kid\u2014[Laughter]\u2014but I would do it for mine\u2014give $100. Yes; I paid my kids to read books\u2014\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014but only when I get a book report, explaining \u201cWhat are the most important things they got out of the book?\u201d\n\nOr if you know somebody, who is starting life, out of college and in the workforce, this is a great graduation gift.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ve got copies of the book, <em>Adulting 101<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order it from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY is the number. Again, the website: FamilyLifeToday.com; or get in touch with us by phone at 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-358-6329. Ask for your copy of the book, <em>Adulting 101;<\/em> and we\u2019ll get it out to you.\n\nNow, we want to also ask you to be in prayer this weekend for couples in Cleveland, Ohio; in Lincoln, Nebraska; and in the Poconos in Pennsylvania. We\u2019ve got three <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways taking place this weekend\u2014hundreds of couples, who will be with us for the weekend, learning about God\u2019s design for marriage. Pray for those couples, if you would.\n\nAnd thanks to those of you who help make all that we do at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> possible\u2014not only this radio program\u2014but these events, our website, the resources we\u2019re creating. You make that possible when you donate to support the ongoing work of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We are grateful for your partnership.\n\nIf you are a regular listener\u2014you\u2019ve never donated\u2014we\u2019d love to have you join the team. You can donate, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to donate at 1-800-358-6329. We\u2019re grateful that you\u2019d even consider doing that and hope to hear from you.\n\nNow, as we wrap this week up\u2014and particularly this conversation about transitioning into adulthood and <em>Adulting 101<\/em>\u2014we\u2019ve got the President of FamilyLife, David Robbins, joining us again. Hey, David.\n\n<strong>David:<\/strong> Hey, Bob; today\u2019s conversation reminds me of my first job in high school. It was in the service department of a car dealership. I knew <em>nothing<\/em> about cars <em>whatsoever<\/em>; but I would greet the people bringing their cars in and try to interpret the noises they were making\u2014that their cars were making\u2014onto a sheet of paper in order to pass on to the mechanic. It was a real job. The alarm clock was set at six a.m. throughout the entire summer. There was no air-conditioning in the middle of Mississippi heat.\n\nI clearly remember the day when I was moving cars on the lot, and I wrecked my Algebra teacher\u2019s Cadillac, 15 minutes after it had been fixed up and released from the body shop.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Oh my goodness! [Laughter]\n\n<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes; it was a day I learned how much growth can take place when we experience grace and truth at the same time. There were, indeed, some consequences to what happened; there was a cost to what happened; but it was combined with the kindness from my boss and, actually, also from my math teacher\u2019s husband, which was kind of surprising\u2014I was scared of him.\n\nWhen we were working with 20-somethings before we came to FamilyLife, one of the things we discovered was a consistent growth area for young adults today was the ability to carry tension in life and encounter grace and truth at the same time\u2014to not go all bad or all good on yourself, or on someone else, or a situation. When I think about investing in the next generation, I think, often, we need to make sure we\u2019re not rescuing our kids and grandkids out of pain; but at the same time, we\u2019re lavishing grace on them in their time of need.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; that\u2019s good. Thank you.\n\nWell, we hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church this weekend, and I hope you can join us back on Monday when Drew Hill is going to be here to talk about how important it is for, both, moms and dads\u2014but particularly for dads\u2014to be present as your kids are growing up. The power of presence\u2014we\u2019ll talk about that Monday. I hope you can be with us.\n\nI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you Monday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\n<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\n<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\nWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\nCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2019 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\n<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":["Josh Burnette and Pete Hardesty want young men to find success in the workplace by learning the value of hard work, punctuality, and responsibility."],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:32:27"],"show_notes":[""],"filesize":["29.72M"],"filesize_raw":["31161404"],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300097.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300097.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px 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Burnette and Pete Hardesty want young men to find success in the workplace. In order to see that happen, young men have to learn the value of hard work, punctuality, and responsibility.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-03-22.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, March 22<sup>nd<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. How do we, as parents, help make sure our children are ready to manage their money as they move into adulthood? We\u2019ll talk with Pete Hardesty and Josh Burnette about that today. Stay with us.\n\nAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. One of the things that, Dave, you like to talk to men about is the need for them to step up to be men. You\u2019re really talking to them about what we\u2019ve been talking about this week, which is taking responsibility for their actions and their lives\u2014not being passive\u2014but owning what they need to be responsible for.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes, going from boyhood to manhood\u2014I think it\u2019s a huge leap\u2014it always has been; but in our culture, it\u2019s like, \u201cWhat is a man?\u201d It could be said: \u201cWhat is a woman?\u201d \u201cWhen does that happen?\u2014when do you become an adult?\u201d This book really does help define that for men and women: \u201cWhat does an adult man\/woman look like?\u201d\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The book you\u2019re talking about is <em>Adulting 101<\/em>\u2014the book we\u2019ve been talking about, this week, by Josh Burnette and Pete Hardesty.\n\nGuys, welcome back. Good to have you guys here.\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Thank you.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> Thanks for having us.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Josh and Pete come at this subject from two different perspectives. Josh is a Chick-fil-A<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> owner\/operator, working with a lot of employees who are in that adulting stage of life\u2014high school\/college-age kids and young adults. Pete has been involved with the ministry of Young Life<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, which\u2014by the way, I shared with you\u2014my wife came to faith through Young Life. I was a volunteer leader for six years. We have great respect for the work that Young Life is doing and are grateful for the ministry you have on high school campuses and with college kids.\n\nYou talk about this being something, Dave, that both men and women have to deal with. I was just curious, Ann: \u201cDo women need to step up too?\u201d I mean, I don\u2019t hear that kind of a rally cry and charge given to women the way I hear it often given to men.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Well, I think it\u2019s a little different for women. I think the difference is that women struggle with control, probably, more than men do. I was listening to you guys, as we\u2019ve been talking about this, this week. I\u2019ve realized that\u2014as a mother or as Mom and my perspective\u2014I struggle more with giving up the control of my kids as they <em>become<\/em> adults. I can see myself stepping in to say, \u201cHey, do you need me to write your resume?\u201d [Laughter] I think moms can struggle with that piece more than the stepping up piece. It\u2019s almost like, maybe, we need to step <em>back<\/em>.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; so let\u2019s dive into, really, what\u2019s at the heart of adulting. As we\u2019ve been talking about this week\u2014is the whole idea of taking responsibility for your life\/owning responsibility. What we see in the culture a lot today is people who, when something goes wrong, their first impulse is to look somewhere else and find: \u201cThe reason it went wrong is because somebody did this,\u201d or \u201c\u2026because I didn\u2019t have this advantage,\u201d or to start to find blame outside of themselves.\n\nYou guys are saying a big part of adulting is to say, \u201cI\u2019ve got to own, at least, my part of the fails that I experience in life\u201d; right?\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Absolutely. The genesis of this book really came about because of the erosion of learning how to adult well in the home. As I witnessed that as an employer\u2014and then, not really receiving these same life skills at school\u2014a lot of young people are looking to their employer to help mature and turn them into an adult.\n\nI was having these conversations that I had with my father; but now, as an employer. As these conversations were happening more and more frequently around purchasing a vehicle, or moving out, or time-management, that is what propelled <em>this<\/em> to come into being.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> One of my friends, who is a young person, said this quote: \u201cBeing an adult is exactly like a birthday party; except, when the pi\u00f1ata breaks open, it\u2019s full of bills and big scary decisions. [Laughter] It\u2019s trouble.\u201d Another one said: \u201cI\u2019m really glad I learned about parallelograms instead of how to do taxes. It\u2019s really come in handy this parallelogram season.\u201d [Laughter]\n\nSo, I think there\u2019s blame to go around and how our society and culture has changed. You know, I think that there are a lot of places to look; but I do think what we talked about earlier is that childish ways are a focus on yourself\u2014focus on self\/being selfish. Then, when you grow up to be an adult, you start to be others-centered. When you start to really grow and learn\u2014I think to serve others could be the most important part of learning how to adult.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; yes.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> I remember that one of the big lessons I learned\u2014and I was so grateful to one of my mentors, named Bill\u2014around time-management and around self-importance was\u2014we would meet any time. This was when I was in college. It was on a Thanksgiving or Christmas break; and we met at the mall, where he would be walking. He was in his 70\u2019s at that time. He would go walk for a couple miles, and then we\u2019d join\u2014meet for lunch.\n\nI was 20 minutes late, and I rushed in\u2014maybe, even 25. I sat down. He just looked me in the eyes; and he said, \u201cPete, are you late a lot?\u201d I said, \u201cYes; I am.\u201d He said, \u201cYou know what you are saying to people when you are late?\u201d I thought, \u201cUh-oh.\u201d I said: \u201cI\u2019m really busy. I\u2019ve got a lot of stuff to do.\u201d He said, \u201cNo.\u201d Then, his voice got raised up a lot louder. I had <em>never<\/em> heard this from my mentor, Bill. He said, \u201cWhat you\u2019re saying,\u201d\u2014he stood up and said [fast talking and raised voice]\u2014\u201c\u2019Whatever you\u2019ve got to do is more important than whatever I\u2019ve got to do. You\u2019re saying you are more important than <em>me<\/em>.\u2019\u201d I remember looking around, and everybody is looking at us.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Wow.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> I thought, \u201cOh my gosh!\u201d Then, he just sat back down and said, \u201cSo, how has college been? [Laughter] How\u2019s the first semester of your sophomore year?\u201d\n\nI\u2019ll <em>never<\/em> forget that, because it made me realize that time-management is actually a piece of how we treat <em>other<\/em> people. It\u2019s not just getting our stuff together; it\u2019s not just \u201cYou\u2019re disorganized,\u201d\u2014it\u2019s a priority. You either have a priority for yourself and getting done or you\u2019re not making others a priority to whatever you are going to. That\u2019s just one aspect we cover.\n\nWe have a couple of chapters on time-management in the book as far as how to maximize our time\/how to get the most out of every day; because time is the one thing that all of us have the same amount of, and I think God will want us to do the right things with our time.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I remember, when our kids were in high school, some of our kids were better at this than others; but we had some\u2014who would look at a deadline for a school project or a paper; and they knew, if they turned it in late, they would lose a letter grade\u2014they would make the value choice of: \u201cI would rather have the time and procrastinate and lose the letter grade than to get this in on time.\u201d As a parent, it\u2019s driving you crazy. And most of the time, they knew, \u201cIf I turn this in on time, I\u2019m good enough in this class, I can get an \u2018A\u2019 on that paper.\u201d\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> How did <em>you<\/em> respond to that?\u2014and Mary Ann?\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; so we talked to them about value and priorities and about the fact that, in real life, sometimes, it\u2019s not the difference between whether you get an \u201cA\u201d or a \u201cB.\u201d It\u2019s the difference between whether you succeed or fail. That\u2019s why being on time was more of a priority than they were making it; they didn\u2019t listen to that. [Laughter] I mean, there was <em>nothing<\/em> that we said that they would: \u201cOh, man, you know, Mom\/Dad, you are really right. I need to be more\u2026\u201d\n\nHere is the other thing I remember. We had one child, who would set his alarm to get up in the morning. No matter how loud he set it, he could sleep right through that alarm. There was this regular practice of coming down at 8:30; school started at 8:15. He comes down at 8:30 and said, \u201cI never heard the alarm.\u201d Then, you are faced with that dilemma: \u201cWhat do you do, as a parent? Do you take them late? Do you say, \u2018Walk to school\u2019? Do you say, \u2018You stay home today\u2019?\u201d I\u2019m thinking, \u201cHe\u2019s going to be in college next year, and there\u2019s nobody around to handle this for him.\u201d\n\nThese are the kinds of time-management\/personal responsibility issues that kids have to confront, at some point, and go, \u201cIf I\u2019m going to be an adult, I have to take ownership of this.\u201d\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes; here\u2019s a question I have, Pete. When you were sharing that story\u2014I mean, Bob\u2019s the parent, speaking to this\u2014and we\u2019re doing the same thing\u2014you had a guy raise his voice and tell you what it meant when you\u2019re late. So, talk to the person, who is <em>that<\/em> guy. When do we make the decision, \u201cI\u2019m going to speak truth, <em>hard<\/em>, to help them become an adult; because they need to hear it\u201d? It changed your life. I mean, it was like\u2014maybe, your parents had said it to you before; but that guy, that day, was a turning point.\n\nI want to be that guy in somebody else\u2019s life. I don\u2019t think that\u2019s my gift to the world. I\u2019m supposed to speak the truth to everybody; but every once in a while, it\u2019s like: \u201cMan, should I say this to Pete? I don\u2019t know,\u201d\u2014I\u2019m wrestling with it. Yet, he had the courage to say it; and it changed your life. You\u2019re writing a book that has some of those truths in it, because one man spoke that to you. So, talk to a person about: \u201cHow do I make this decision as to whether I speak truth or I just keep it to myself?\u201d\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> Dave, that\u2014you bring up a great point. For us to speak truth to people, I think we have to have earned the right.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> He did. He met with me pretty regularly for <em>years<\/em> before he chose to exercise that right to speak to me in that way and have it be that memorable. The other thing, I think, is people really need to know that we have their best interests in mind; so I knew that\u2014I knew that about him. It doesn\u2019t mean that I accept everything; sometimes, that\u2019s hard, especially for family.\n\nThe other thing\u2014I think if you\u2019re a young person, you need to be looking for mentors. You might have the best mom and dad in the world; but we need a\u2014studies have shown\u2014we need a constellation of mentors. If we put all our eggs in one basket\u2014a man or a woman\u2014they\u2019re imperfect, because everybody is imperfect; they are going to let us down in some ways.\n\nAnd not everybody is\u2014to have a constellation of mentors, everybody brings something to the table. I have something to learn from everybody, and I feel like I bring something that might be of value to everyone. I think, looking outside of the home\u2014and you might\u2014a lot of times, if you are blessed with a great mom or dad, that main mentor can be in the home, which is great; but even outside of that, every mom and dad is imperfect. So, I think\u2014if you\u2019re a mom or dad\u2014to encourage your children to have mentors that are besides you. They can learn all kinds of different things from them.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Dave and I did that with our own kids\u2014in terms of we <em>prayed<\/em> for those mentors. We were always amazed that we would say these things to try to equip our sons and: \u201cThis is what you should do\u2026\u201d \/ \u201cThis is a great idea\u2026\u201d and they\u2019d kind of blow it off; but then, some man came into their life and said the same thing\u2014like, \u201cThis is <em>amazing<\/em>.\u201d Dave and I are like, \u201cWe been saying that for years!\u201d [Laughter]\n\nYet, we prayed so diligently that God would bring men into their lives; and God was faithful to do that. I believe that was one of the big changing points for each one of our sons\u2014is the men who poured into them.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> One of the things that you talk about in your book, <em>Adulting 101<\/em>, is taking responsibility for employment\/getting a job. Now, a lot of high school kids today\u2014their life is already over-crowded. Do you think it\u2019s smart for parents to clear out some things so that the kids work during their high school years?\u2014or is that something that is just going to be an unnecessary distraction? I\u2019m talking to a Chick-fil-A owner\/operator. I think I know what your answer is going to be; right? [Laughter]\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Yes; absolutely. I started working when I was 14 to an employer, which was Chick-fil-A as well. What I learned in the workplace was so invaluable from, again, an interpersonal relationship skill set. That what they have an opportunity to learn\u2014and they don\u2019t need to work 40 hours a week to glean those skills, especially, as a young adult\u2014but having somebody else, outside of the family, that they are responsible to and beginning to learn those building blocks, while they are still in high school, produces tremendous results in college and beyond.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Did that mean you couldn\u2019t play soccer, or you couldn\u2019t be in the school play, or whatever?\n\n<strong>Josh:<\/strong> There are different seasons of time. There was still an opportunity to be engaged in sports and engaged in school; but also, I could still work on the weekends; or maybe, I could work one or two nights a week. So, again, it wasn\u2019t a full-time employment; but I had the opportunity to still learn from my time at Chick-fil-A.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> It\u2019s crazy to think\u2014because I\u2019ve talked to so many parents that\u2014like Bob just said: \u201cI don\u2019t want my son or daughter to miss the school play,\u201d or \u201c\u2026the sports team. So, I\u2019m going to give them an allowance. I\u2019m going to give them money, so they can live.\u201d I think that\u2019s the wrong perspective\u2014I really do\u2014because it\u2019s like: \u201cOh my gosh. Life is about learning to be an adult.\u201d\n\nThat\u2019s what your book does\u2014I got your book and read it. I thought: \u201cOh my gosh. Every parent should be handing this book to somebody to help their child, because this stuff\u2026\u201d I learned stuff about being an adult in your book. [Laughter] I didn\u2019t know what life insurance was about; I didn\u2019t know how to invest. I mean, it\u2019s so practical: \u201cGet a job,\u201d \u201cHow to do car payments,\u201d\u2014all that stuff.\n\nI\u2019m like: \u201cI <em>failed<\/em>, as a parent. I didn\u2019t teach many of those things.\u201d Yet, here it is, as a tool to hand to a parent or anybody and say, \u201cHere you go. You want something to walk somebody through?\u2014here it is.\u201d They are going to eat it up.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Pete, one of the other areas that you talk about, as you help kids get ready for adulthood\/learn how to adult, is how to manage money. This is something\u2014I remember a call from one of our kids, at college, who had apparently figured out a way, in spite of my knowing about it, to get a credit card and had figured out a way to charge something\u2014a lot of somethings\u2014on that credit card without me knowing about it. All of a sudden, this child was in trouble with that credit card.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Ooh; I would have liked to have heard that conversation. [Laughter]\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And that was\u2014it was quite a conversation; but it was a part of that child\u2019s adulting experience to say: \u201cWe\u2019re going to sit down and figure out\u2014now, here\u2019s the hole you got yourself into. How\u2019s this hole feel? Is this a hole you\u2019d like to be in very often? Now, I\u2019ll help you figure out, \u2018How do we dig out of the hole?\u2019\u201d I did not want the 18 percent interest that was attached to that credit card any more than the child wanted it, but I also didn\u2019t want to just solve the problem for the child.\n\nThat\u2019s where I think a lot of parents make a mistake\u2014is not letting their kids experience some of the consequences of poor money choices or poor time choices. You don\u2019t let them feel what it\u2019s like to lack responsibility\u2014you cover that up for them\u2014and they never feel the sting of a bad choice.\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> That\u2019s actually the biggest topic in the book; I think we have four chapters on it. One of the big principles it starts with is: \u201cMoney won\u2019t make you happy, but mismanagement of money will make you miserable.\u201d It\u2019s not like that\u2019s the secret sauce that\u2014if we get enough money, we\u2019ll be really happy\u2014but if you don\u2019t take care of it \/ if you don\u2019t learn some good habits around money, it can be disastrous. It can really affect your quality of life for going on.\n\nThe other big principle that our chapters are written from is that: \u201cAll the money in the world is God\u2019s. Every dollar in everybody\u2019s pocket\u2014every peso, every yen, every shekel\u2014is all God\u2019s; so all we\u2019re doing is being stewards of it.\u201d So, the question is: \u201cHow are you going to steward this money?\u201d It comes back to \u201cNaked we come; naked we go.\u201d\n\nI\u2019ve been to a lot of funerals. I\u2019ve never seen one, where there is a lot of money\u2014like, in the coffin\u2014stuffed around somebody laying there. You know, everybody leaves the same amount of money behind when they die\u2014all of it\u2014so how are you going to take care of it while you are here?\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I heard a pastor one time say, \u201cWhen it comes to the issue of giving, the question is not: \u2018How much of my money am I going to give to God\u2019s work?\u2019 It is: \u2018How much of God\u2019s money am I going to keep for myself?\u2019\u201d\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> When you reposition the question that way, all of a sudden, it does change your perspective and go: \u201cOh, yes; this money is God\u2019s money. Now, the question is: \u2018How much do I spend on myself, and how much do I spend on other things that matter to me, like advancing the Kingdom?\u2019\u201d\u2014which really brings us to where you guys wrap up the book.\n\nYou wrap up the book with what is the ultimate issue as children move from childhood to adulthood. They can master every part of this book; but if they get this last part wrong, there is a problem; isn\u2019t there?\n\n<strong>Pete:<\/strong> Yes, Bob; the book is about how to succeed in life. It\u2019s written from a perspective that there are certain realities in our life that God has set up in our world; so for example, one of them is: \u201cYou reap what you sow,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s not just agriculturally; that\u2019s, also, financially; it\u2019s, also, relationally. There are a lot of things that are set up, in reality, that the more we learn and live into that, the better our lives get\u2014the better we get at life, and the better our lives will be.\n\nBut we can do a lot things right and miss the big picture. Josh and I went, back and forth; and we thought about this and talked about it a lot. We thought, \u201cWe don\u2019t want to write a success manual for life and leave out the biggest part; because people will be missing out on true, full life.\u201d Jesus is that great, and following Him is what we were made to do.\n\nSo, really, this book can work for any young person, no matter what their\u2014you know, wherever they are in their spiritual journey, and no matter what they think about God, Jesus, faith\u2014because at the very end, we kind of give a very winsome view of who Jesus is and what He has\u2014the reason He came and what He has to offer in this life.\n\nBut there is no real other mention of the Bible\u2014even though it all comes from God\u2019s truth and every\u2014you could almost retitle each chapter, you know: \u201cA Christian Ethic on Finances\u201d; \u201cA Christian Ethic on Sex and Dating\u201d; \u201cA Christian Ethic on Professionalism.\u201d But we wanted it to be relevant for every single person, no matter what they thought, and so to come at it with an open mind.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes; I loved how you did that. As I read through the book, I\u2019m thinking, as a parent\u2014even as an older adult; I won\u2019t give my age, trying to still be an adult\u2014I\u2019m like: \u201cMan! Oh, man! This is incredibly wise counsel that nobody gets on practical life skills; and yet, anybody could read it.\u201d An atheist could read it and get incredible wisdom from it. Then, at the very end, it is almost like you go: \u201cIf you want to know where this came from, watch this. This is all from the most popular, best-selling book every written called the Bible.\u201d\n\nAnn and I speak at corporations, sometimes, about marriage and relationships. They tell us, \u201cYou can\u2019t mention Jesus.\u201d People come up afterwards and go, \u201cWhere did you get that stuff?!\u201d We\u2019re like, \u201cWell, it\u2019s in the Bible.\u201d They\u2019re like: \u201cWhat?! You\u2019ve got to be kidding me.\u201d So, it\u2019s the same thing here\u2014it\u2019s like: \u201cThat\u2019s\u201d\u2014this whole book, like you said, could be a biblical treatise on success; yet, you did it in such a compelling way. Really, the way you did at the end of the chapter\u2014way to go! A parent could hand this to a son, who says: \u201cI want nothing to do with church. I want nothing to do with God.\u201d They\u2019d still get a <em>ton<\/em> out of this book; and at the end, they\u2019d be drawn to go, \u201cHmm, maybe, I should know the Author of all these great truths.\u201d Good job.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I would think, if you had a high school junior or senior, as a mom or a dad, to start going, chapter by chapter, through this book with them\u2014\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I <em>love<\/em> that idea.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014<em>great<\/em> preparation. If you\u2019ve got a son or a daughter, who is in college\u2014to just give them this as a gift; but I\u2019d give it to them as a gift and say, \u201cI\u2019ll pay you $100 if I get a book report on this after you\u2019ve read it.\u201d\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Would you do that?\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I would\u2014not for your kid\u2014[Laughter]\u2014but I would do it for mine\u2014give $100. Yes; I paid my kids to read books\u2014\n\n<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014but only when I get a book report, explaining \u201cWhat are the most important things they got out of the book?\u201d\n\nOr if you know somebody, who is starting life, out of college and in the workforce, this is a great graduation gift.\n\n<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ve got copies of the book, <em>Adulting 101<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order it from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY is the number. Again, the website: FamilyLifeToday.com; or get in touch with us by phone at 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-358-6329. Ask for your copy of the book, <em>Adulting 101;<\/em> and we\u2019ll get it out to you.\n\nNow, we want to also ask you to be in prayer this weekend for couples in Cleveland, Ohio; in Lincoln, Nebraska; and in the Poconos in Pennsylvania. We\u2019ve got three <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways taking place this weekend\u2014hundreds of couples, who will be with us for the weekend, learning about God\u2019s design for marriage. Pray for those couples, if you would.\n\nAnd thanks to those of you who help make all that we do at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> possible\u2014not only this radio program\u2014but these events, our website, the resources we\u2019re creating. You make that possible when you donate to support the ongoing work of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We are grateful for your partnership.\n\nIf you are a regular listener\u2014you\u2019ve never donated\u2014we\u2019d love to have you join the team. You can donate, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to donate at 1-800-358-6329. We\u2019re grateful that you\u2019d even consider doing that and hope to hear from you.\n\nNow, as we wrap this week up\u2014and particularly this conversation about transitioning into adulthood and <em>Adulting 101<\/em>\u2014we\u2019ve got the President of FamilyLife, David Robbins, joining us again. Hey, David.\n\n<strong>David:<\/strong> Hey, Bob; today\u2019s conversation reminds me of my first job in high school. It was in the service department of a car dealership. I knew <em>nothing<\/em> about cars <em>whatsoever<\/em>; but I would greet the people bringing their cars in and try to interpret the noises they were making\u2014that their cars were making\u2014onto a sheet of paper in order to pass on to the mechanic. It was a real job. The alarm clock was set at six a.m. throughout the entire summer. There was no air-conditioning in the middle of Mississippi heat.\n\nI clearly remember the day when I was moving cars on the lot, and I wrecked my Algebra teacher\u2019s Cadillac, 15 minutes after it had been fixed up and released from the body shop.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Oh my goodness! [Laughter]\n\n<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes; it was a day I learned how much growth can take place when we experience grace and truth at the same time. There were, indeed, some consequences to what happened; there was a cost to what happened; but it was combined with the kindness from my boss and, actually, also from my math teacher\u2019s husband, which was kind of surprising\u2014I was scared of him.\n\nWhen we were working with 20-somethings before we came to FamilyLife, one of the things we discovered was a consistent growth area for young adults today was the ability to carry tension in life and encounter grace and truth at the same time\u2014to not go all bad or all good on yourself, or on someone else, or a situation. When I think about investing in the next generation, I think, often, we need to make sure we\u2019re not rescuing our kids and grandkids out of pain; but at the same time, we\u2019re lavishing grace on them in their time of need.\n\n<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; that\u2019s good. Thank you.\n\nWell, we hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church this weekend, and I hope you can join us back on Monday when Drew Hill is going to be here to talk about how important it is for, both, moms and dads\u2014but particularly for dads\u2014to be present as your kids are growing up. The power of presence\u2014we\u2019ll talk about that Monday. I hope you can be with us.\n\nI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you Monday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\n<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\n<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\nWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\nCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2019 FamilyLife. 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