{"id":300015,"date":"2019-01-11T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2019-01-11T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/father-wounds\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:13","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:13","slug":"father-wounds","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/father-wounds\/","title":{"rendered":"Father Wounds"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jonathan Edwards gives keen insight into the reality of what occurs in the life and heart of a child when a parent chooses to leave the family through divorce.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-01-11.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:25:13","filesize":"23.09M","filesize_raw":"24214614","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2830,2873],"tags":[4030,4033,4031,4032],"podcast_series":[7160],"cwp_profile":[8797],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300015","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-children-of-divorce","category-mental-and-emotional-issues","tag-abandoned","tag-divorce","tag-neglected-by-father","tag-parents-divorce","podcast_series-left","cwp_profile-jonathan-edwards","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300015\/father-wounds","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300015\/father-wounds","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"u7TQWdiYKq\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/father-wounds\/\">Father Wounds<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/father-wounds\/embed\/#?secret=u7TQWdiYKq\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Father Wounds&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"u7TQWdiYKq\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-01-11.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-01-11.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>After Jonathan Edwards\u2019 mom and dad got divorced, Jonathan was estranged from his father for years until they had a reunion when Jonathan was in college\u2014Jonathan, and his dad, and his dad\u2019s girlfriend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>So we\u2019re sitting there. I got asked by her to say a little bit about me and my dad\u2019s relationship and how it had been over the years. For the first time in my life, I felt like: \u201cI really want him to know how we\u2019ve struggled,\u201d and \u201cHow I\u2019ve wanted him to be around.\u201d I don\u2019t know what came over me; but I got the courage to speak up and say: \u201cWe\u2019re struggling over here. Why is it that you love your dogs more than you love your children?\u201d I remember her looking at me and saying: \u201cJonathan, you\u2019re 19 years old. You don\u2019t need your dad.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, January 11<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019re going to hear today from Jonathan Edwards about how important a dad is in a child\u2019s life, and what happens to that child when dad leaves. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. I\u2019ve heard a lot of young men\u2014older men, for that matter\u2014who have talked about how their life has been marked by what they have described as a father wound. I know you grew up with a dad who didn\u2019t leave a lot of wounds in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes; and that\u2019s always puzzled me a bit, Bob; because his father walked out on him and his eight brothers and sisters, back in the \u201820s, when divorce was unheard \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tof. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I never, ever really heard my dad talk that much about it. I wish he had been around a bit longer; because undoubtedly I would have asked him a few questions, trying to get at it, and ask him what he experienced back then. But he became a great man\u2014husband\/father\u2014in spite of some of the gaps that were in his life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a guest with us, Jonathan Edwards, who joins us, again, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Jonathan, welcome back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Glad to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>He is the author of a book called <em>Left<\/em>. It\u2019s the story of his own family that he grew up in\u2014and a father, who didn\u2019t leave just once, but left twice\u2014and the impact of that on his life. There\u2019s more to that story that we\u2019ll be unpacking here in today\u2019s broadcast. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJonathan is a writer; he\u2019s also in graphic arts and design; and he\u2019s a real gift to the body of Christ, with his many talents in writing curriculum. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe writes for the ERLC, The Gospel Coalition, and <em>Desiring God<\/em> with John Piper. Jonathan has been married to Katherine for five years and contributes this book as really the story of his journey dealing with divorce.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; your dad left when you were in elementary school. You didn\u2019t know why or what\u2014you just knew Dad had moved out. He came back months later, and you thought the family was coming back together. There was kind of a dramatic moment, where it looked like Dad was dead to the old life and now raised to walk in newness of life. There was hope for you; and then, not long after that, your dad leaves again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWas there a pattern in your mom\u2019s and dad\u2019s relationship? Did you find out later\u2014had there been anger?\u2014had there ever been any kind of domestic violence?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Not domestic violence; but as I grew up, I did realize that my mom shared with us that, before my brother had been born\u2014my brother was born in 1980, sister born in 1981, and me \u201985\u2014that my mom and dad had actually separated several times before my brother was even born.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you know what all of that was about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I don\u2019t know the specifics. I do know that the difference of faith was an issue. My dad told me, later in life, that the Christian home my mom desired to bring us up in was not his decision; it was hers. I think this is something that my mom still wrestles with. She actually called me last week, and she asked me if I knew that she was sorry. [Emotion in voice] My wife and I just\u2014we cried with her; because we said, \u201cThere\u2019s nothing for you to be sorry about.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>What was she specifically asking about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>She was asking\u2014should she have tried harder? Was there more she could have done? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven at 66, she was concerned that the Lord would not find her effort faithful. I tried to console her and say: \u201cAt some point, you have to realize you did what you could; and it wasn\u2019t on you. You can\u2019t save another person; you can\u2019t change another person.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is something that\u2014not even us, as her kids, but even her\u2014were still dealing with is: \u201cWhat was the issue?\u201d There are some mental things in there associated with my dad, so we understand those things; but figuring out: \u201cWhat was my fault?\u201d and \u201cHow could I have changed it?\u201d I think that is just a very <em>enslaving<\/em> thought process.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, you\u2019d been through it as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes; so when you say\u2014you know, a dad leaving multiple times\u2014that what you wrestle with, when he\u2019s gone, is a whole different thing to wrestle with: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWhat is wrong with me that he could be so mad at me that he just doesn\u2019t want to talk to me?\u201d or \u201c\u2026he doesn\u2019t even want to try to reconcile? What could be so defective <em>in me<\/em>?\u201d You talk about a question that will affect me and has affected me for my entire life. Heaven will be the first time I see life, not with the film of fatherlessness. I don\u2019t know what it\u2019s like to process <em>anything<\/em> without seeing life through that lens, and it is exhausting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, thinking about what played into Dad and Mom doing that\u2014I do think about that. I think my mom\u2019s wrestling with that; but for me, I\u2019m wrestling with, \u201cWhat is so wrong with me that I\u2019m such a <em>risk<\/em> to people committing to me\/to people valuing me?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s all rooted in: \u201cIf my own dad won\u2019t do that\u2014if my own dad doesn\u2019t see me valuable enough to talk to\/to reconcile with, what gives me any hope that an employer, a spouse\u201d\u2014even though I\u2019m <em>so<\/em> thankful for Catherine, but even coming to that was hard\u2014\u201cWhat are you seeing that he didn\u2019t see?\u201d and \u201cWhy are you here?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and \u201cWhy do you stay?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I mean, marriage\u2014I\u2019m just reflecting back on my own journey, which is nothing like yours, but you enter into marriage and you go: \u201cWill I be able to fulfill this commitment?\u201d and \u201cWill my wife be able to fulfill it to me? Will she see something in me where I\u2019m not loveable?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re talking about raw emotions, Bob, of what human beings experience. I think what Jonathan is doing here is\u2014he\u2019s giving us a peek behind the curtain at the impact of divorce on a man\u2019s life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your relationship with your dad during junior high and high school was an every-other-weekend relationship?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Not every other weekend; we hung out a couple times. I would go see him, but it wasn\u2019t an every\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It wasn\u2019t a routine. Did you look forward to those times?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I did. But what is <em>so<\/em> interesting is\u2014that when I think about that, I was <em>so<\/em> proud, I guess, of where my dad lived. He lived on the lake\u2014had jet skis\/had a boat. I wanted my friends to kind of come up there; because the fact that my dad was successful and had these amenities, I wanted to be the friend that invited my friends to have a good time\u2014like to be able to supply that to them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut what is very interesting is that there were families in our church that knew my dad\u2014and that knew him, and what he enjoyed, and how he acted\u2014and there were several friends that weren\u2019t allowed to come with me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember it breaking my heart; because I thought, \u201cThere\u2019s nothing I can do to fix this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You\u2019re talking about their parents would not allow them to come with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes, yes; so you can imagine\u2014I mean\u2014even as a junior in high school\/senior in high school\u2014you\u2019re like, \u201cWell, should I go?\u201d [Laughter] It was sad\u2014it was having to wrestle with that and \u201cWhat\u2019s going on here?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, I think you\u2019d have to wrestle with the fact that, here, your dad\u2019s living on the lake with jet skis; and your mom can\u2019t come up with the money for you to go on the ski trip with the youth group. You\u2019re not living the jet ski life; and that\u2019s where dad is\u2014out on the lake. Was there never any sense, in your heart, that\u2019s like, \u201cHey Dad, could you help us out here a little bit?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>There was. That\u2019s actually the reason that he and I do not talk anymore, just because I brought that up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Take us to that. Take us to the\u2014this was while you were in college, a freshman in college\u2014and you, and your dad, and\u2014his fianc\u00e9?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You guys got together for dinner.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This was 2004.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>September of \u201904. He asked to take me to dinner\u2014he asked me and my sister. My sister said she didn\u2019t want to go, so she didn\u2019t go. We joke about that to this day\u2014that I had to experience that by myself, and she just stayed back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you know it was going to be \u201cMeet the fianc\u00e9\u201d dinner?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I did\u2014I knew that she was coming; I just didn\u2019t know what was going to happen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re sitting there. I got asked by her to say a little bit about me and my dad\u2019s relationship and how it had been over the years. I kind of explained it and kind of said what I thought about it. I don\u2019t know what came over me; but I just, for the first time in my life, I felt like: \u201cI really want him to know how we\u2019ve struggled,\u201d and \u201cHow I\u2019ve wanted him to be around.\u201d I don\u2019t know what came over me; but I got the courage to speak up and say: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWe\u2019re struggling over here. If it wasn\u2019t for some of our family members\/if it wasn\u2019t for some of these people in our lives that have taken care of us, we would be on the street. Why is it that you love your dogs more than you love your children?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember her looking at me and saying: \u201cJonathan, you\u2019re 19 years old. You don\u2019t need your dad.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I started crying. I just was\u2014the first thing I thought was: \u201cFirst of all, who are you?!\u201d\u2014like\u2014\u201cHow did you get here?\u201d The second thing was\u2014I said something specific about a couple family members that have helped us over the years. He said something <em>very<\/em> degrading about them\u2014spoke ill of them in a way that he should have never said to me\u2014and I ran out the restaurant; got in the car. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe get home; and my mom and her boyfriend, my now-stepdad, Rusty, were sitting on the couch. I ran to my room, and she asked me what happened. I told her the things that he said. She was offended; she was hurt. She was going to call him and ask him: \u201cWhy did you say these things to Jonathan? Why did you do this?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe didn\u2019t that day, but she did end up\u2014she wanted to stick up for me, and so she called him. A couple days later, I was in my dorm room. I got a call from him; and he said: \u201cHow dare you share with your mother what I told you in confidence? If you ever have something you want to tell me that you don\u2019t want her to know, I suggest you never do it; because I will do the same thing to you that you have done to me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>He hung up the phone, and that was the last time I talked to him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No communication around birthdays\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>He might have sent something\u2014a Christmas card or two over the years\u2014but sometimes it was signed by his fianc\u00e9, at the time, or the lady he was with. There was a year, 2006\u2014so two years after that\u2014where my sister and brother got invited to his house for Thanksgiving; and I did not get invited. So me and my mom just had Thanksgiving by ourselves.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wrote a letter to him in 2012. My pastors, at the time, had encouraged me\u2014they saw what it was doing to me\u2014and they said, \u201cIf you don\u2019t reach out to him, you\u2019re going to be 38 years old and bitter and angry.\u201d I just remember being so <em>frustrated<\/em>: \u201cWhy do <em>I<\/em> have to reach out? Why do <em>I<\/em> have to be the adult? He hasn\u2019t talked to me\u2014he\u2019s the one\u201d\u2014what I said was\u2014\u201cHe\u2019s the one that left! Why do I need to do this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can tell you guys that that was the pivot point for me in this <em>whole process<\/em> of viewing my dad. I had always looked at him with anger, with bitterness, with rage. The pastor had told me to just kind of read Ephesians 2 and to really reflect, theologically, on my status in Christ before God and what God had to do to save me. I thought about that, and thought about that, and thought about that; and I realized that what my dad had done to me would <em>never<\/em> come close to what I do to the Lord, on a daily basis, and what my <em>sin<\/em> has done to him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI realized it is one thing to never talk to him again here; it\u2019s whole other thing to not talk to him for the rest of eternity. Reconciliation with <em>me<\/em> is <em>so<\/em> much less important than my dad being reconciled to the Father. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI viewed my dad as just a man in need of saving, the same way that <em>I<\/em> am in need of saving. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just remember my mom, every day, asking us: \u201cAre you praying for your dad?\u201d \u201cAre you praying for your dad?\u201d \u201cAre you praying for your dad?\u201d I remember saying, \u201cWhy should I pray for him?\u201d You can imagine the spiritual pride that just flooded my mind with how arrogant I was. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPeople ask, \u201cWhat do you pray for him?\u201d and the only thing I know to pray is, \u201cWill You save him?\u201d Asking my forgiveness is <em>completely<\/em> different than him asking the Lord\u2019s forgiveness; and I think when you get to that point, you\u2019re able to <em>completely<\/em> forgive. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEphesians 2 has been <em>huge<\/em>; I love Isaiah 43, where it says: \u201cBehold, do you not see that I am doing a new thing? I am bringing rivers in the wilderness.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that I love that has been <em>so<\/em> valuable is Psalm 40, where David talks about: \u201cI will not restrain my lips to declare the glad news of your deliverance.\u201d Isaiah 61 is another, where, \u201cFor the spirit of heaviness we put on a garment of praise.\u201d What are we praising?\u2014we\u2019re praising Him\u2014that He has restored me in a way that I could not restore myself. If I\u2019m really glad about that\/if I know what He has done that for me, personally, I need to be on my face, praying that my dad leaving me is <em>light<\/em> compared to what we have done to God\u2019s righteousness\u2014how we have defamed Him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you have any idea if he knows that you\u2019ve written this book?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>He has read it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How do you know that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>A year-and-a-half ago, he had gotten all of my family\u2019s addresses. [Emotion in voice] We were <em>so<\/em> hopeful that this would be when he would be restored to us, and we would get to have a relationship with him. What we got in the mail was a bound book. The first page said: \u201cNon-fiction books pride themselves on facts, reality, and research,\u201d or something. \u201cJonathan Edwards\u2019 book, <em>Left<\/em>, is not one of those.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the end of every chapter was an indictment to me on how I misrepresented things. I did not read it; my wife did and several of my friends.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They advised you not to read it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>They said, \u201cYou do not need to read this.\u201d What I wanted to do with my book\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I wanted people to <em>end<\/em> my book, knowing that Christ is in all and fills all; and that is why the first chapter is called \u201cEmpty\u201d and the last chapter is \u201cFilled.\u201d I wanted people to <em>marvel<\/em> at the Lord\u2019s faithfulness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Emotion in voice] Two, I wanted people to know that, if one parent leaves you, the Lord is so faithful to provide another parent to do the job of two. People who read my book have said to me that they pray the Lord would allow them to meet my mom. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Emotion in voice] And three, I did not want people coming away thinking ill of my dad, but I wanted the Lord to be number one. I wanted to provide some form of hope to kids\/to adults\u2014to say, \u201cYes, my dad left; but I am alive physically, and I am alive spiritually because my mom <em>refused<\/em> to give up.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think about how she is the <em>strongest<\/em> woman I know, and she <em>loves<\/em> the Lord with a joy that I don\u2019t even understand. You can imagine, for me, hearing her heartbreak\u2014that she thinks she is to blame\u2014I just don\u2019t know how to handle that: \u201cI think this is why you\u201d\u2014[mom]\u2014\u201care so faithful to the Lord; because you are always reflecting on, \u2018Lord, how can I increase in sanctification? Show me Psalm 19\u2014declare me innocent of <em>hidden<\/em> faults.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just hope the Lord and His grace are magnified through this, <em>not<\/em> my dad\u2019s mistakes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I agree with you on that. I think about how your words are touching people\u2019s lives right now\u2014and thinking about those who are adult children of divorce\u2014maybe they\u2019re not adults yet; maybe they\u2019re still in the home\u2014but the call for every person is to forgive as you have been forgiven. That\u2019s what I hear you saying. That call has enabled you to come clean before the Lord\u2014to forgive your father.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can know when you\u2019ve forgiven someone when you give up the right to punish them\u2014when anger is replaced with prayers that are praying for their wellbeing. It\u2019s hard to pray for somebody who\u2019s the enemy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA second group of people I\u2019m thinking about are those dads\/moms\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014maybe they are grandparents\u2014who are living out the result of some choices that they could have done better, and they have regret. The same God who led Jonathan to forgive is the same God who wants to forgive you and your choices. If you haven\u2019t read Ephesians, Chapter 2, take a look at it. At the core, it says, \u201cFor by grace you have been saved through faith, and that is not of yourself\u2026lest any man should boast.\u201d It may be a time to come to faith in Jesus Christ, if you don\u2019t know Him\u2014there is cleansing for that person.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And the story\u2019s not over. We don\u2019t know how this will resolve itself in this life or in eternity; but the story\u2019s not over, and there\u2019s still hope. I think everybody listening\u2014who would find themselves in a situation, estranged from a child or from a parent, knowing of their mistakes; knowing of how they were affected or wounded\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014they just need to know that there can be reconciliation; there can be hope. That\u2019s the news of the gospel: forgiveness, reconciliation, and hope are the cornerstone elements of the gospel, not just between us and God, but between us and our fellow man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor anybody who has had the experience of being abandoned by a parent, get a copy of Jonathan\u2019s book. It\u2019s called <em>Left: The Struggle to Make Sense of Life When a Parent Leaves<\/em>. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com to order your copy, or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; our toll-free number is 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d Ask about the book, <em>Left: The Struggle to Make Sense of Life When a Parent Leaves<\/em>, when you get in touch with us; and we\u2019ll get a copy sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, a quick reminder. We\u2019re encouraging couples, this week, to begin a new discipline in your marriage as we start a new year; and that\u2019s the discipline of spending time together each day, praying together, as a couple. Our team has put together a series of seven prayer prompts that we\u2019re sending out via email. When you sign up for them, we\u2019ll send one to you each day for seven days. You can sign up with both of your email addresses, and then each of you will get the prayer prompt. You can carve out time in the morning or in the evening; but get together and just spend a few minutes looking at the email, praying together, reading a verse of Scripture, maybe sharing a few thoughts with each other. You\u2019ll be amazed at how this daily discipline can have a significant impact on your marriage relationship, and that\u2019s what we\u2019re hoping will happen with tens of thousands of our listeners. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve not signed up yet to get the seven days of marriage prayer prompts from us, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, go to FamilyLifeToday.com and look for the link that says \u201cBetter Together.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll get it all taken care of, and you can start a new practice in your marriage that will pay dividends.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church this weekend, and we hope you can join us back on Monday. We\u2019re going to talk about the first years of marriage and why those are particularly challenging for couples. Jim Burns will be with us for that. We hope you can be here as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today\u2014his name is Keith Lynch\u2014along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2019 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:25:13"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["23.09M"],"filesize_raw":["24214614"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300015.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300015.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Edwards gives keen insight into the reality of what occurs in the life and heart of a child when a parent chooses to leave the family through divorce.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-01-11.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>After Jonathan Edwards\u2019 mom and dad got divorced, Jonathan was estranged from his father for years until they had a reunion when Jonathan was in college\u2014Jonathan, and his dad, and his dad\u2019s girlfriend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>So we\u2019re sitting there. I got asked by her to say a little bit about me and my dad\u2019s relationship and how it had been over the years. For the first time in my life, I felt like: \u201cI really want him to know how we\u2019ve struggled,\u201d and \u201cHow I\u2019ve wanted him to be around.\u201d I don\u2019t know what came over me; but I got the courage to speak up and say: \u201cWe\u2019re struggling over here. Why is it that you love your dogs more than you love your children?\u201d I remember her looking at me and saying: \u201cJonathan, you\u2019re 19 years old. You don\u2019t need your dad.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, January 11<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019re going to hear today from Jonathan Edwards about how important a dad is in a child\u2019s life, and what happens to that child when dad leaves. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. I\u2019ve heard a lot of young men\u2014older men, for that matter\u2014who have talked about how their life has been marked by what they have described as a father wound. I know you grew up with a dad who didn\u2019t leave a lot of wounds in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes; and that\u2019s always puzzled me a bit, Bob; because his father walked out on him and his eight brothers and sisters, back in the \u201820s, when divorce was unheard \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tof. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I never, ever really heard my dad talk that much about it. I wish he had been around a bit longer; because undoubtedly I would have asked him a few questions, trying to get at it, and ask him what he experienced back then. But he became a great man\u2014husband\/father\u2014in spite of some of the gaps that were in his life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a guest with us, Jonathan Edwards, who joins us, again, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Jonathan, welcome back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Glad to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>He is the author of a book called <em>Left<\/em>. It\u2019s the story of his own family that he grew up in\u2014and a father, who didn\u2019t leave just once, but left twice\u2014and the impact of that on his life. There\u2019s more to that story that we\u2019ll be unpacking here in today\u2019s broadcast. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJonathan is a writer; he\u2019s also in graphic arts and design; and he\u2019s a real gift to the body of Christ, with his many talents in writing curriculum. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe writes for the ERLC, The Gospel Coalition, and <em>Desiring God<\/em> with John Piper. Jonathan has been married to Katherine for five years and contributes this book as really the story of his journey dealing with divorce.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; your dad left when you were in elementary school. You didn\u2019t know why or what\u2014you just knew Dad had moved out. He came back months later, and you thought the family was coming back together. There was kind of a dramatic moment, where it looked like Dad was dead to the old life and now raised to walk in newness of life. There was hope for you; and then, not long after that, your dad leaves again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWas there a pattern in your mom\u2019s and dad\u2019s relationship? Did you find out later\u2014had there been anger?\u2014had there ever been any kind of domestic violence?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Not domestic violence; but as I grew up, I did realize that my mom shared with us that, before my brother had been born\u2014my brother was born in 1980, sister born in 1981, and me \u201985\u2014that my mom and dad had actually separated several times before my brother was even born.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you know what all of that was about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I don\u2019t know the specifics. I do know that the difference of faith was an issue. My dad told me, later in life, that the Christian home my mom desired to bring us up in was not his decision; it was hers. I think this is something that my mom still wrestles with. She actually called me last week, and she asked me if I knew that she was sorry. [Emotion in voice] My wife and I just\u2014we cried with her; because we said, \u201cThere\u2019s nothing for you to be sorry about.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>What was she specifically asking about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>She was asking\u2014should she have tried harder? Was there more she could have done? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven at 66, she was concerned that the Lord would not find her effort faithful. I tried to console her and say: \u201cAt some point, you have to realize you did what you could; and it wasn\u2019t on you. You can\u2019t save another person; you can\u2019t change another person.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is something that\u2014not even us, as her kids, but even her\u2014were still dealing with is: \u201cWhat was the issue?\u201d There are some mental things in there associated with my dad, so we understand those things; but figuring out: \u201cWhat was my fault?\u201d and \u201cHow could I have changed it?\u201d I think that is just a very <em>enslaving<\/em> thought process.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, you\u2019d been through it as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes; so when you say\u2014you know, a dad leaving multiple times\u2014that what you wrestle with, when he\u2019s gone, is a whole different thing to wrestle with: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWhat is wrong with me that he could be so mad at me that he just doesn\u2019t want to talk to me?\u201d or \u201c\u2026he doesn\u2019t even want to try to reconcile? What could be so defective <em>in me<\/em>?\u201d You talk about a question that will affect me and has affected me for my entire life. Heaven will be the first time I see life, not with the film of fatherlessness. I don\u2019t know what it\u2019s like to process <em>anything<\/em> without seeing life through that lens, and it is exhausting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, thinking about what played into Dad and Mom doing that\u2014I do think about that. I think my mom\u2019s wrestling with that; but for me, I\u2019m wrestling with, \u201cWhat is so wrong with me that I\u2019m such a <em>risk<\/em> to people committing to me\/to people valuing me?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s all rooted in: \u201cIf my own dad won\u2019t do that\u2014if my own dad doesn\u2019t see me valuable enough to talk to\/to reconcile with, what gives me any hope that an employer, a spouse\u201d\u2014even though I\u2019m <em>so<\/em> thankful for Catherine, but even coming to that was hard\u2014\u201cWhat are you seeing that he didn\u2019t see?\u201d and \u201cWhy are you here?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and \u201cWhy do you stay?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I mean, marriage\u2014I\u2019m just reflecting back on my own journey, which is nothing like yours, but you enter into marriage and you go: \u201cWill I be able to fulfill this commitment?\u201d and \u201cWill my wife be able to fulfill it to me? Will she see something in me where I\u2019m not loveable?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re talking about raw emotions, Bob, of what human beings experience. I think what Jonathan is doing here is\u2014he\u2019s giving us a peek behind the curtain at the impact of divorce on a man\u2019s life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your relationship with your dad during junior high and high school was an every-other-weekend relationship?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Not every other weekend; we hung out a couple times. I would go see him, but it wasn\u2019t an every\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It wasn\u2019t a routine. Did you look forward to those times?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I did. But what is <em>so<\/em> interesting is\u2014that when I think about that, I was <em>so<\/em> proud, I guess, of where my dad lived. He lived on the lake\u2014had jet skis\/had a boat. I wanted my friends to kind of come up there; because the fact that my dad was successful and had these amenities, I wanted to be the friend that invited my friends to have a good time\u2014like to be able to supply that to them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut what is very interesting is that there were families in our church that knew my dad\u2014and that knew him, and what he enjoyed, and how he acted\u2014and there were several friends that weren\u2019t allowed to come with me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember it breaking my heart; because I thought, \u201cThere\u2019s nothing I can do to fix this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You\u2019re talking about their parents would not allow them to come with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes, yes; so you can imagine\u2014I mean\u2014even as a junior in high school\/senior in high school\u2014you\u2019re like, \u201cWell, should I go?\u201d [Laughter] It was sad\u2014it was having to wrestle with that and \u201cWhat\u2019s going on here?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, I think you\u2019d have to wrestle with the fact that, here, your dad\u2019s living on the lake with jet skis; and your mom can\u2019t come up with the money for you to go on the ski trip with the youth group. You\u2019re not living the jet ski life; and that\u2019s where dad is\u2014out on the lake. Was there never any sense, in your heart, that\u2019s like, \u201cHey Dad, could you help us out here a little bit?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>There was. That\u2019s actually the reason that he and I do not talk anymore, just because I brought that up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Take us to that. Take us to the\u2014this was while you were in college, a freshman in college\u2014and you, and your dad, and\u2014his fianc\u00e9?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You guys got together for dinner.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This was 2004.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>September of \u201904. He asked to take me to dinner\u2014he asked me and my sister. My sister said she didn\u2019t want to go, so she didn\u2019t go. We joke about that to this day\u2014that I had to experience that by myself, and she just stayed back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you know it was going to be \u201cMeet the fianc\u00e9\u201d dinner?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I did\u2014I knew that she was coming; I just didn\u2019t know what was going to happen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re sitting there. I got asked by her to say a little bit about me and my dad\u2019s relationship and how it had been over the years. I kind of explained it and kind of said what I thought about it. I don\u2019t know what came over me; but I just, for the first time in my life, I felt like: \u201cI really want him to know how we\u2019ve struggled,\u201d and \u201cHow I\u2019ve wanted him to be around.\u201d I don\u2019t know what came over me; but I got the courage to speak up and say: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWe\u2019re struggling over here. If it wasn\u2019t for some of our family members\/if it wasn\u2019t for some of these people in our lives that have taken care of us, we would be on the street. Why is it that you love your dogs more than you love your children?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember her looking at me and saying: \u201cJonathan, you\u2019re 19 years old. You don\u2019t need your dad.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>I started crying. I just was\u2014the first thing I thought was: \u201cFirst of all, who are you?!\u201d\u2014like\u2014\u201cHow did you get here?\u201d The second thing was\u2014I said something specific about a couple family members that have helped us over the years. He said something <em>very<\/em> degrading about them\u2014spoke ill of them in a way that he should have never said to me\u2014and I ran out the restaurant; got in the car. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe get home; and my mom and her boyfriend, my now-stepdad, Rusty, were sitting on the couch. I ran to my room, and she asked me what happened. I told her the things that he said. She was offended; she was hurt. She was going to call him and ask him: \u201cWhy did you say these things to Jonathan? Why did you do this?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe didn\u2019t that day, but she did end up\u2014she wanted to stick up for me, and so she called him. A couple days later, I was in my dorm room. I got a call from him; and he said: \u201cHow dare you share with your mother what I told you in confidence? If you ever have something you want to tell me that you don\u2019t want her to know, I suggest you never do it; because I will do the same thing to you that you have done to me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>He hung up the phone, and that was the last time I talked to him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No communication around birthdays\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>He might have sent something\u2014a Christmas card or two over the years\u2014but sometimes it was signed by his fianc\u00e9, at the time, or the lady he was with. There was a year, 2006\u2014so two years after that\u2014where my sister and brother got invited to his house for Thanksgiving; and I did not get invited. So me and my mom just had Thanksgiving by ourselves.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wrote a letter to him in 2012. My pastors, at the time, had encouraged me\u2014they saw what it was doing to me\u2014and they said, \u201cIf you don\u2019t reach out to him, you\u2019re going to be 38 years old and bitter and angry.\u201d I just remember being so <em>frustrated<\/em>: \u201cWhy do <em>I<\/em> have to reach out? Why do <em>I<\/em> have to be the adult? He hasn\u2019t talked to me\u2014he\u2019s the one\u201d\u2014what I said was\u2014\u201cHe\u2019s the one that left! Why do I need to do this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can tell you guys that that was the pivot point for me in this <em>whole process<\/em> of viewing my dad. I had always looked at him with anger, with bitterness, with rage. The pastor had told me to just kind of read Ephesians 2 and to really reflect, theologically, on my status in Christ before God and what God had to do to save me. I thought about that, and thought about that, and thought about that; and I realized that what my dad had done to me would <em>never<\/em> come close to what I do to the Lord, on a daily basis, and what my <em>sin<\/em> has done to him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI realized it is one thing to never talk to him again here; it\u2019s whole other thing to not talk to him for the rest of eternity. Reconciliation with <em>me<\/em> is <em>so<\/em> much less important than my dad being reconciled to the Father. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI viewed my dad as just a man in need of saving, the same way that <em>I<\/em> am in need of saving. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just remember my mom, every day, asking us: \u201cAre you praying for your dad?\u201d \u201cAre you praying for your dad?\u201d \u201cAre you praying for your dad?\u201d I remember saying, \u201cWhy should I pray for him?\u201d You can imagine the spiritual pride that just flooded my mind with how arrogant I was. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPeople ask, \u201cWhat do you pray for him?\u201d and the only thing I know to pray is, \u201cWill You save him?\u201d Asking my forgiveness is <em>completely<\/em> different than him asking the Lord\u2019s forgiveness; and I think when you get to that point, you\u2019re able to <em>completely<\/em> forgive. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEphesians 2 has been <em>huge<\/em>; I love Isaiah 43, where it says: \u201cBehold, do you not see that I am doing a new thing? I am bringing rivers in the wilderness.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that I love that has been <em>so<\/em> valuable is Psalm 40, where David talks about: \u201cI will not restrain my lips to declare the glad news of your deliverance.\u201d Isaiah 61 is another, where, \u201cFor the spirit of heaviness we put on a garment of praise.\u201d What are we praising?\u2014we\u2019re praising Him\u2014that He has restored me in a way that I could not restore myself. If I\u2019m really glad about that\/if I know what He has done that for me, personally, I need to be on my face, praying that my dad leaving me is <em>light<\/em> compared to what we have done to God\u2019s righteousness\u2014how we have defamed Him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you have any idea if he knows that you\u2019ve written this book?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>He has read it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How do you know that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>A year-and-a-half ago, he had gotten all of my family\u2019s addresses. [Emotion in voice] We were <em>so<\/em> hopeful that this would be when he would be restored to us, and we would get to have a relationship with him. What we got in the mail was a bound book. The first page said: \u201cNon-fiction books pride themselves on facts, reality, and research,\u201d or something. \u201cJonathan Edwards\u2019 book, <em>Left<\/em>, is not one of those.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the end of every chapter was an indictment to me on how I misrepresented things. I did not read it; my wife did and several of my friends.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They advised you not to read it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jonathan: <\/strong>They said, \u201cYou do not need to read this.\u201d What I wanted to do with my book\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I wanted people to <em>end<\/em> my book, knowing that Christ is in all and fills all; and that is why the first chapter is called \u201cEmpty\u201d and the last chapter is \u201cFilled.\u201d I wanted people to <em>marvel<\/em> at the Lord\u2019s faithfulness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Emotion in voice] Two, I wanted people to know that, if one parent leaves you, the Lord is so faithful to provide another parent to do the job of two. People who read my book have said to me that they pray the Lord would allow them to meet my mom. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Emotion in voice] And three, I did not want people coming away thinking ill of my dad, but I wanted the Lord to be number one. I wanted to provide some form of hope to kids\/to adults\u2014to say, \u201cYes, my dad left; but I am alive physically, and I am alive spiritually because my mom <em>refused<\/em> to give up.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think about how she is the <em>strongest<\/em> woman I know, and she <em>loves<\/em> the Lord with a joy that I don\u2019t even understand. You can imagine, for me, hearing her heartbreak\u2014that she thinks she is to blame\u2014I just don\u2019t know how to handle that: \u201cI think this is why you\u201d\u2014[mom]\u2014\u201care so faithful to the Lord; because you are always reflecting on, \u2018Lord, how can I increase in sanctification? Show me Psalm 19\u2014declare me innocent of <em>hidden<\/em> faults.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just hope the Lord and His grace are magnified through this, <em>not<\/em> my dad\u2019s mistakes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I agree with you on that. I think about how your words are touching people\u2019s lives right now\u2014and thinking about those who are adult children of divorce\u2014maybe they\u2019re not adults yet; maybe they\u2019re still in the home\u2014but the call for every person is to forgive as you have been forgiven. That\u2019s what I hear you saying. That call has enabled you to come clean before the Lord\u2014to forgive your father.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can know when you\u2019ve forgiven someone when you give up the right to punish them\u2014when anger is replaced with prayers that are praying for their wellbeing. It\u2019s hard to pray for somebody who\u2019s the enemy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA second group of people I\u2019m thinking about are those dads\/moms\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014maybe they are grandparents\u2014who are living out the result of some choices that they could have done better, and they have regret. The same God who led Jonathan to forgive is the same God who wants to forgive you and your choices. If you haven\u2019t read Ephesians, Chapter 2, take a look at it. At the core, it says, \u201cFor by grace you have been saved through faith, and that is not of yourself\u2026lest any man should boast.\u201d It may be a time to come to faith in Jesus Christ, if you don\u2019t know Him\u2014there is cleansing for that person.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And the story\u2019s not over. We don\u2019t know how this will resolve itself in this life or in eternity; but the story\u2019s not over, and there\u2019s still hope. I think everybody listening\u2014who would find themselves in a situation, estranged from a child or from a parent, knowing of their mistakes; knowing of how they were affected or wounded\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014they just need to know that there can be reconciliation; there can be hope. That\u2019s the news of the gospel: forgiveness, reconciliation, and hope are the cornerstone elements of the gospel, not just between us and God, but between us and our fellow man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor anybody who has had the experience of being abandoned by a parent, get a copy of Jonathan\u2019s book. It\u2019s called <em>Left: The Struggle to Make Sense of Life When a Parent Leaves<\/em>. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com to order your copy, or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; our toll-free number is 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d Ask about the book, <em>Left: The Struggle to Make Sense of Life When a Parent Leaves<\/em>, when you get in touch with us; and we\u2019ll get a copy sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, a quick reminder. We\u2019re encouraging couples, this week, to begin a new discipline in your marriage as we start a new year; and that\u2019s the discipline of spending time together each day, praying together, as a couple. Our team has put together a series of seven prayer prompts that we\u2019re sending out via email. When you sign up for them, we\u2019ll send one to you each day for seven days. You can sign up with both of your email addresses, and then each of you will get the prayer prompt. You can carve out time in the morning or in the evening; but get together and just spend a few minutes looking at the email, praying together, reading a verse of Scripture, maybe sharing a few thoughts with each other. You\u2019ll be amazed at how this daily discipline can have a significant impact on your marriage relationship, and that\u2019s what we\u2019re hoping will happen with tens of thousands of our listeners. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve not signed up yet to get the seven days of marriage prayer prompts from us, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, go to FamilyLifeToday.com and look for the link that says \u201cBetter Together.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll get it all taken care of, and you can start a new practice in your marriage that will pay dividends.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church this weekend, and we hope you can join us back on Monday. We\u2019re going to talk about the first years of marriage and why those are particularly challenging for couples. Jim Burns will be with us for that. We hope you can be here as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today\u2014his name is Keith Lynch\u2014along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2019 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/300015","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300015"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300015"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300015"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300015"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=300015"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=300015"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=300015"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}