{"id":284434,"date":"2024-07-26T08:00:00","date_gmt":"2024-07-26T12:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham\/"},"modified":"2025-06-10T17:08:57","modified_gmt":"2025-06-10T21:08:57","slug":"feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham\/","title":{"rendered":"Feel Invisible? Overcoming Insecurity with Kelly &#038; Jimmy Needham"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Ever feel invisible? Kelly and Jimmy Needham offer hope and encouragement for overcoming insecurity and living a purposeful life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ever feel invisible? Kelly and Jimmy Needham offer hope and encouragement for overcoming insecurity and living a purposeful life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":47000,"featured_media":280865,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"audio","audio_file":"https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/56a10294-6445-40f2-a5e4-b1a8011480db\/audio.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:27:49","filesize":"25.50M","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"2024-07-26 08:00:00","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2873],"tags":[2722],"podcast_series":[8779],"cwp_profile":[3631,3632],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-284434","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mental-and-emotional-issues","tag-overcoming-insecurity","podcast_series-purposefooled-kelly-jimmy-needham","cwp_profile-jimmy-needham","cwp_profile-kelly-needham","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/06\/image-scaled.jpg?w=1024","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/284434\/feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/284434\/feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"ipnzgAyjNG\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham\/\">Feel Invisible? Overcoming Insecurity with Kelly &#038; Jimmy Needham<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/feel-invisible-overcoming-insecurity-with-kelly-jimmy-needham\/embed\/#?secret=ipnzgAyjNG\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Feel Invisible? Overcoming Insecurity with Kelly &#038; Jimmy Needham&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"ipnzgAyjNG\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! 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You can also find Kelly's book, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jimmyandkelly.com\/friendish\">Friendish<\/a>, there as well as other resources. Find Jimmy on social media \"<a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/jimmyneedham\/\">@jimmyneedham<\/a>\" and Kelly \"<a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/kellyneedham\/\">@kellyneedham<\/a>\".<\/li>\n<li>Wanna hear more episodes by Kelly Needham, <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/guest\/kelly-needham\/\">listen here<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>This week, for a donation of any size, we'll send you <a href=\"https:\/\/donate.familylife.com\/july-2024\/purposefooled\/?cru_source=FLTD24&amp;cru_medium=Icare&amp;cru_campaign=July2024\">Purposefooled: Why Chasing Your Dreams, Finding Your Calling<\/a>, as our way of saying a huge \"\"Thank you!\"\" for partnering with us toward stronger families around the world.<\/li>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n"],"transcript_content":["<p>FamilyLife Today\u00ae National Radio Version (time edited) Transcript<\/p>\n<p>References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete.<\/p>\n<p>Feel Invisible? Overcoming Insecurity<\/p>\n<p>Guests:Kelly and Jimmy Needham<\/p>\n<p>From the series:Purposefooled (Day 2 of 2)<\/p>\n<p>Air date:July 26, 2024<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I, regularly, will have moments where I am in the house. A thing has happened with a kid, and it\u2019s like, \u201cAlright, I have to pause my whole day now to address this issue.\u201d I am in the hallway to try to make it a private moment with this child, so the other ones are somewhere else. Sometimes, I\u2019ll use my imagination in that moment, and say, \u201cJesus, help me do this well, because I don\u2019t know the fruit of this moment or its impact.\u201d I\u2019ll imagine it: \u201cHow many lives will be impacted by this child in their adulthood because we handled this conversation well?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Shelby: Welcome to FamilyLife Today, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I\u2019m Shelby Abbott, and your hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson. You can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: This is FamilyLife Today!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: So, one of the things I\u2019m still embarrassed about in our\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014is this confession time?!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I guess it sort of is.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I think our listeners have maybe heard me say this; maybe one time, because I\u2019m embarrassed, so I don\u2019t say it very often; but when we were first married, first year at the University of Nebraska as the chaplain for the Nebraska Corn Huskers sports teams, I would be introduced: \u201cHey, this is Dave Wilson. He\u2019s with Athletes in Action\u00ae, and he\u2019s the chaplain of our team.\u201d Previously, I was always introduced: \u201cDave Wilson\u2019s the quarterback of the football team. He\u2019s been All-Conference; he was all-American,\u201d and always had this thing.<\/p>\n<p>Actually, one day, I came home [Laughter]\u2014I\u2019m so embarrassed to say this\u2014after months of this, and I said to Ann, \u201cListen, nobody here knows that I was like something a year ago.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I think his words were like: \u201cThese people think I\u2019m a loser.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes! [Laughter] And so, what I said to her (and I can\u2019t believe I said this; talk about insecurity): \"I can\u2019t say, \u2018Hey! Last year, or the last four years, I was on a full scholarship\u2026\u2019 I was something! So, when I\u2019m introduced, could you just drop it in?\u201d [Laughter] I literally asked her to let people know I\u2019m really somebody.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Would you mind making me look awesome? [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Dave: How embarrassing!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I did it. I actually did it.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, you did it. That\u2019s even worse, that you actually did it. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019ve got Kelly and Jimmy Needham talking about purpose and calling and identity. We started a conversation yesterday. If you didn\u2019t hear that, go back and listen to yesterday, because we\u2019re going to follow up on that.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: With her book (Kelly\u2019s book), Purposefooled.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, Purposefooled. Again, welcome back.<\/p>\n<p>When you hear that story, are you just like, \u201cYou\u2019ve got to be kidding me?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Did you think, \u201closer,\u201d too?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: No!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Are you kidding? [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Hold on.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: What a loser.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Can we have confession number two on the Needham side? I\u2019ll start.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Ohh!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Let\u2019s go!<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: [In] those early years of touring\u2014which, if you heard yesterday\u2019s program, you\u2019ll remember this\u2014I was very insecure in the touring life with you. I would pull you aside and say, \u201cJimmy, you have to tell them you\u2019re married and that your wife is here. You have to let your audience know, because people don\u2019t know who I am. I\u2019m over at your merch table.\u201d I was kind of like: \u201cMake a big deal of me!\u201d [Laughter] That\u2019s pretty much what I said\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014I hope you did.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014on more than one occasion.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I did! Yes, that was easy for me to say.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: You\u2019ll sell more merch anyway.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, that\u2019s right. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: So, I totally feel you there [Dave].<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Alright, Jimmy, what\u2019s your confession?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, I\u2019m trying to think of a day when I\u2019m not having those feelings. [Laughter] I remember one time, I\u2019m driving to a show with my band. This is like a white van.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: A white 15-passanger van?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, that\u2019s right. I\u2019ve got my drummer driving; I\u2019m lying in the back row. [Laughter] We\u2019re going to some town that nobody has ever heard of. I just got word that one of my peers, who was a friend of mine, had his face plastered up in Times Square; his song\u2019s number one. All of that\u2019s happening, and I\u2019m seething.<\/p>\n<p>God brings to mind John 21. It\u2019s the moment where Jesus is resurrected. He has returned; He\u2019s with His disciples on the beach; He\u2019s talking with Peter. \u201cJesus says to Peter: \u2018I tell you the truth, when you were young, you used to dress yourself, go wherever you wanted; when you\u2019re older, someone else is going to dress you, stretch you out, lead you to where you do not want to go.\u2019 He said this to indicate by which kind of death Peter would glorify God.\u201d And then, He says, \u201cFollow Me.\u201d [John 21:18-19]<\/p>\n<p>That phrase struck me. I was so confronted with my own sin: \u201cIt might be the death of my career that brings glory to God more than the success of it,\u201d and \u201cDo I want God\u2019s fame more than my fame?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Oh, there it is.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u201cAm I equally as happy when my buddy goes number one with a single that\u2019s boasting about Jesus, and my song is getting no radio traction? Am I equally as happy if it means that God is somehow glorified in both?\u201d And my answer is: \u201cNo.\u201d I\u2019m not equally happy. I would sure like to be on Times Square.<\/p>\n<p>That was the big turning point for me, realizing, \u201cOh, my identity\u2014my sense of worth\u2014is way too tied to my accomplishments. I am way less impressed with the fame of Jesus; I am way more impressed with the fame of Jimmy.\u201d That\u2019s a big problem! God, for years after that, was working on me to work a lot of that out of me.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: We\u2019re facing that continually. When we started speaking for the Weekend to Remember\u00ae with FamilyLife\u00ae, at the first conference I ever did, a woman came up to me and said, \u201cI am so disappointed you are our speaker.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Oh! Wow!<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I said, \u201cI am, too! [Laughter] What could you possibly learn from me?!\u201d I remember going back to the room, and getting on my knees before Jesus, and I said, \u201cI have no business\u201d (especially, when somebody points it out) \u201cLord, I can\u2019t even do this.\u201d There\u2019s this other part of it, where: \u201cI\u2019m nothing. I\u2019m nobody. I have nothing to be able to give.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That was when I was younger.<\/p>\n<p>Now, we\u2019re getting older. Now, it\u2019s like, \u201cYes, you\u2019re too old to be relatable to what\u2019s going on.\u201d [Laughter] So, we\u2019re faced with both ends of it: \u201cWill I have a voice now that I\u2019m older? Did I have a voice when I was younger?\u201d and \u201cDoes that even matter?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: He intends to make us fruitful. He intends to bear fruit from our lives. He really does. That is a promise.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That is an expectation for all who are in Christ, that they would bear fruit, which means impact.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: As long as we have breath, right?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right, which means it\u2019s not associated with what we\u2019re doing, with how relevant we are, with what we have to contribute, with our skillset or lack of skillset.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It actually only has to do with our connection to the Vine. As long as we are connected to Him, we can bear fruit. [John 15]<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Ooh, let\u2019s talk about that abiding. What does that look like, as we\u2019re talking about purpose?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes. When I think about that passage, John 15, that\u2019s really the classic place that we would go to for Jesus talking about that, He says, \u201cApart from Me you can do nothing.\u201d That was really, I think, my first lesson in what makes my life purposeful and meaningful: \u201cApart from Me, you can do nothing.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>My thought\u2014I remember studying that passage\u2014was: \u201cWow! Then, Jesus, there\u2019s a whole lot of really effective, impressive-looking nothing in the world.\u201d [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>There is!<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u201cThere are whole things that look like they\u2019re really changing things, that You would say, \u2018If they\u2019re not connected to Me, they are nothing.\u2019 In the final analysis, it will be blown away.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s a deep thought, right there.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Isn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s really helped me, though, because it\u2019s really tempting to look around on social media, or whatever else we\u2019re doing, and to see stuff happening and assess it as: \u201cImportant,\u201d \u201cNoteworthy,\u201d \u201cEffective.\u201d And then to look at your own life that looks very mundane and normal, and say, \u201cWell, this doesn\u2019t compare to that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s like: \u201cWell, let me change my perspective\u2014let me take off the glasses I have on and put on a different pair\u2014and say, \u2018Jesus, how would You see it?\u2019\u201d He says, \u201cApart from Me you can do nothing.\u201d \u201cWell, okay then.\u201d [Laughter] That also means: \u201cWith Me, you can do everything.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I remember realizing, in an early season of motherhood: \u201cAlright! Abiding with Jesus is the most important thing that I can do to make my life effective. If I do that, He promises fruit will come. He says, \u2018Anyone who abides in Me will bear much fruit\u2019.\u201d [John 15:5] It\u2019s a promise! I don\u2019t have to worry about the fruit. I don\u2019t have to work hard to make the fruit come. I just have to stick close to Him; and His promise and guarantee is, it will be fruitful.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: What does that look like? I\u2019m thinking about your life, Kelly, as a young mom.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: You have five kids now. You continually make Jesus a priority to abide with Him.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I think that finding time to connect with Jesus every day\u2014I\u2019ve realized\u2014is paramount and important. It doesn\u2019t matter so much if it\u2019s the beginning of the day. I mean, that obviously feels like the ideal Christian standard, right? \u201cStart your day with Jesus.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I had to find different ways to find connection with Jesus, even if it was just on the drive to school with kids, or on a walk, or listening to my Bible, or finding ways to pray. It was less important to me how that looked than that I had a way to connect with Him and share where I was really at with the Lord and get some kind of intake from His Word and from the community that I\u2019m in. If my purpose is a Person\u2014if my purpose is Jesus, then there\u2019s nothing else more important in my day. That means if my laundry doesn\u2019t get done, and dinner doesn\u2019t get made the way I wanted to, and if we have snacks for lunch, not sandwiches, you know what? It\u2019s okay! [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Ann: So, what is the fruit that has come from that?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I don\u2019t exactly know.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Ask her husband.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I have five kids now who are getting to witness, every day, a woman who is saying, \u201cJesus is the most important Person.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Wow.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2014listen, you guys are still young enough\u2014that\u2019s the greatest gift you\u2019re giving your kids\u2014the greatest one\u2014that they see that Jesus is your everything.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, because you can say it, and you can give them the orders\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014yes\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u2014if they don\u2019t see you treasuring, delighting, enjoying, it\u2019s like, \u201cI don\u2019t buy it!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: And it feels messy at the time, doesn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It is very messy.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I remember taking the kids to school; they\u2019re in the back. I got into a habit when our kids were born that, when I put them in a car seat, I would just get in the car\u2019s driver seat, and I would start praying. Because you have to bring Jesus into every minute of the day.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy and Kelly: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: And I wanted them to know that we pray without ceasing through everything. I\u2019m talking to Him all day long. They hear the messy; they hear the mundane; but they also hear the: \u201cGod! Look at this glorious day! Look at these leaves! You\u2019re amazing!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: They don\u2019t even know what fruit is, but they\u2019re watching you have a vibrant relationship with Jesus.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s what you\u2019re showing them.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I think we want to see the effect and the return of our efforts. In some of these seasons, we have to use our imagination.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: What\u2019s that mean?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I, regularly, will have moments where I am in the house; a thing has happened with a kid, and it\u2019s like, \u201cAlright, I have to pause my whole day now to address this issue.\u201d I am in the hallway to try to make it a private moment with this child, so the other ones are somewhere else. And there are some times when Jimmy is at church, preaching, or prepping to, or on the road. There are crowds in my visual for him, right? And here I am with this one child.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes, I\u2019ll use my imagination in that moment, and say, \u201cJesus, help me do this well, because I don\u2019t know the fruit of this moment or its impact.\u201d I\u2019ll imagine it: \u201cHow many lives will be impacted by this child in their adulthood because we handled this conversation well? Help me, Jesus, to see the crowd of people behind this moment.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Aww, that\u2019s so good!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, that\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It\u2019s like, I need that. We are hungry for that meaning, that purpose. When we see it, visually, in crowds, and platforms, and stages, that\u2019s why we run there. But I think Jesus has that vision for us in the Scriptures. We just have to carry it into these moments of our day and use our imagination to remember.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: You guys, address the person who is listening that maybe feels like, \u201cMan, I did that with my kids, and now, this child is older, and they\u2019re doing nothing. They\u2019ve walked away from the church. I\u2019m not seeing the faith they proclaimed when they were younger.\u201d How would you encourage them?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: If you don\u2019t have a vision of the sovereignty of God, and an appreciation for the Lord doing ten thousand things that we can\u2019t see in a moment, it really would be crippling and discouraging to experience that. I agree with any mom or dad who has a wayward son or daughter. That would be so hard! At the same time, I am comforted by the fact that, as long as they are breathing, the game isn\u2019t over.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Who knows what the Lord is doing?<\/p>\n<p>As a pastor now, I\u2019m privy to a thousand wonderful stories of: \u201cIt didn\u2019t happen when I thought it would, but later in life, my daughter who abandoned Jesus was convicted of her sin and came back to Christ.\u201d This just happened: a gal from our church ran away from the Lord, [but] got baptized in our church just recently\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014wow.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u2014came back to the Lord.<\/p>\n<p>The day before that happens, you still feel like all hope\u2019s lost.<\/p>\n<p>Dave and Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: It\u2019s the day before that happens, and it\u2019s like, \u201cWho knows what our God is up to?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: And then, maybe just the other thing I\u2019d add is, I want everybody to come to know Jesus, but my chief goal in life is not to see results in my decisions as a parent, as a pastor, or as a song writer. My chief goal in life is to glorify the Lord and enjoy Him forever.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: And if that is the aim, then the whole world around me can go bonkers, and the main thing is still getting accomplished. My God is being made much of in my heart and in my life. I don\u2019t know if that feels too reductionistic, but for me, it\u2019s like: \u201cThat can be done no matter how my kid responds to my disciplining, or my parenting, or my gospel presentation, or whatever.\u201d God can still be exalted.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: And He promises that, if you keep abiding with Him, it will bear fruit. It will!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It is a will statement in John 15. I take a lot of comfort in that. So, even if you don\u2019t see the fruit you\u2019re wanting, it doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s not bearing fruit; or maybe something\u2019s growing underground you can\u2019t see yet.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes, that\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: You really do have to entrust that labor to God; that\u2019s His labor. Our labor is to abide with Him; His labor is to bear the fruit. That\u2019s hard. We want to be more in control of it than that. We\u2019re in a culture that tells us we can be more in control of the effects of our life than that.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: That\u2019s right. Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I think, too, that\u2019s why, for me, I have to be in the Word every day.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I have to be with Him every day, because when you\u2019re reminded of the greatness, the vastness, the power, the love, the grace\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014yes, yes\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014it allows you to take a breath to say: \u201cYou love him. You love her. You love me, and I can trust You.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: And like you said, you seize those sacred moments in the dark hallway, when your husband might be off, and you\u2019re alone, and you\u2019re thinking, \u201cThis is so insignificant.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: It\u2019s a holy moment.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It is a holy moment.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: It is. I don\u2019t know if it\u2019s appropriate here, but I remember, years ago in Little Rock, we interviewed Chip Ingram.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I was going to say that, Dave.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: He told the story about his son, Jason, who walked away from the Lord. They prayed and prayed, and his son just walked away. They raised him the right way, and\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014he said, \u201cI\u2019m out. I\u2019m gone.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: He comes back\u2014you probably know him; he\u2019s written some of the best songs\u2014Lauren Daigle\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014You Say.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014\u201cYou say I am loved.\u201d That\u2019s Jason Ingram\u2019s song.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I\u2019ve written with him many times, yes. I love Jason.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: So, you know him better.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, love Jason.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Chip said when he asked his son, \u201cWhy did you come back?\u201d He said, \u201cEvery day I saw you sit on the couch with your Bible open.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: He said, \u201cI can\u2019t deny your faith.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u201cI couldn\u2019t get that out of my head. He\u2019s real. I watched my parents.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy and Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Again, we don\u2019t live it perfectly, but they\u2019re watching. Those little sacred moments that we think are insignificant could turn into the life-changing moment that your son or daughter says, \u201cIt\u2019s real.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: And it\u2019s interesting that his attention is drawn back to his dad\u2019s personal clinging to Jesus.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, yes; abiding.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Not what he\u2019s trying to disciple into him as much; not all the lectures, right?<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: But \u201cYou [Chip], personally, were very attached emotionally, relationally, to a Person I couldn\u2019t see.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s always the question for me: \u201cIs that happening? Am I walking that out?\u201d Sometimes, as a mom\u2014I don\u2019t know if anyone else, any other moms feel this\u2014it almost, sometimes, felt like a luxury to have extended time with Jesus. That sounds silly, maybe, but it was like: \u201cNo, I need\u201d\u2014it feels very noble\u2014\u201cI need to move the laundry,\u201d \u201cI need to do this for my child,\u201d \u201c\u2026do that for my child.\u201d It feels too luxurious to have an hour of time to sit with God. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>No, that\u2019s your command! That\u2019s your command: Number One. It might not be an hour, but any time\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014but you can have nuggets of time.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014you do sit down. I think, as a mom, sometimes, who has many kids, it feels wrong, in the middle of a busy day, to sit.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014or even selfish.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It can feel selfish. I hear that from other moms, as well. \u201cNo! The Lord has told you: \u2018This is your first and greatest command.\u2019\u201d And it is enjoyable to you; it should be. It is restful for you; it\u2019s meant to be. So, receive it without guilt, knowing that this is actually Step Number One to even enable you to love your neighbor as yourself (and those little children are your first neighbors). You can\u2019t do that well without the first part.<\/p>\n<p>That really freed me to then say, \u201cOkay, I can spend time doing this even if my kitchen is a mess still. That\u2019s okay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: We all know, we do our priorities. If it\u2019s a priority\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014we do; that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014you know moms who have five kids or six kids, and somehow, they work out\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014that\u2019s right!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014because their body\u2014they say, \u201cI\u2019ve got to do this.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes, absolutely.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I\u2019ve done it. My body\u2019s more important than my spiritual life. I find a way to get an hour workout in, but I didn\u2019t spend any [time with Jesus]. If my purpose is a Person, the Person has to be a priority.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Let me ask you this: how does this priority of abiding in Christ\u2014how do you do it together as a couple? Talk marriage. Because you\u2019ve got a full life, and craziness going on in your home. Is there an overlap, together, as you do this?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: We just try to be really vocal with each other about what is going on in our internal lives a lot. We get the kids down, and we\u2019re probably talking for an hour after that\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014yes, really nice.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u2014just everything from what our day\u2019s like to, \u201cI read this thing, and it made me feel\u2026I realized, \u2018Oh, I\u2019m putting too much hope in what this person thinks about me\u2019,\u2019\u2019 or whatever.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I think what you\u2019re even saying is that we\u2019ve made each other\u2019s soul and relationship with God a priority.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I care very deeply that you\u2019re healthy and your walk with Jesus is healthy. And you care very much about that for me and have often said, \u201cDo you need to get out?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s so sweet.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u201cDo you need to get out and have some time alone, away from the house?\u201d I\u2019ve said the same thing to you. Even more than our marriage sometimes, it\u2019s like, \u201cYou need to be healthy with Jesus, and I need to be healthy with Jesus first! Then we can work on us.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Usually, if we do the first part well, we don\u2019t have to do much work on us. It\u2019s very natural; there\u2019s an overflow there.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I\u2019ll tell you what it hasn\u2019t looked like\u2014and this is, sometimes, jarring to some believers\u2014it does not look like us poring over the Word in a Bible study together every day. It does not look so much like that. I think there\u2019s a ton of value in that; but for us, we\u2019re able to be spiritually vibrant with each other, with the Lord, without some of the more formal trappings.<\/p>\n<p>When I was 19, and I was asking for marriage advice from people\u2014I remember, it was like a month before I was getting married. I was leading worship for a men\u2019s retreat. The speaker there was a retired Dallas Seminary professor, a savant man of God in his 80s. He didn\u2019t even preach from notes. I asked him marriage advice: \u201cHow do you spiritually lead your wife and all that?\u201d He said, \u201cWell, early on in our marriage, I taught my wife biblical Greek and Hebrew, and we studied the Scriptures in the original languages.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: What?!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Are you kidding me?!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That was his advice to me.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I mean, that\u2019s what we did. [Laughter] That\u2019s what I do, honey.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, I\u2019m sure that\u2019s what you guys do.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Oh, yes!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: For us, it\u2019s not what we ended up doing.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: We added a little Aramaic in there, too. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: But I do think there is some sort of aspiration in biblically-minded Christians: \u201cOh, that\u2019s the\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014\u201dThat\u2019s the pinnacle.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u201cThat\u2019s the pinnacle,\u201d maybe, for them.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: It took me a while to say, \u201cOkay, I can\u2019t live this man\u2019s life in my marriage. I just need to be praying for her; be concerned for her spiritual vibrancy.\u201d That may look different, but letting myself off the hook with some of the things [for which] there\u2019s no verse that says: \u201cDo that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: It just says that I need to lead and shepherd my wife well; love her, sacrificially. But it does not say, \u2018Teach her biblical Hebrew.\u2019\u201d [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014\u201cDo a Bible study together every morning at 5 am.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: But you\u2019ve gotten yourselves into a rhythm.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: When the kids are in bed, you catch up with each other: \u201cWhat\u2019s going on with your heart? What\u2019s going on with your spiritual life?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I think those are really good questions.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes. I know, when I heard you say that\u2014Ann has said to me for 40-plus years now: \u201cI just want to talk about God together.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u201cWhat\u2019s going on? What are you hearing?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u201cI\u2019m walking with Him. I was in the Word today.\u201d It\u2019s easy for me not to share that. It\u2019s like, \u201cNo, no, no. That\u2019s important. I\u2019m going to tell her.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: And there\u2019s something that happens in that conversation.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: A lot of couples don\u2019t even do that.<\/p>\n<p>Shelby: I\u2019m Shelby Abbott; and you\u2019ve been listening to Dave and Ann Wilson with Jimmy and Kelly Needham on FamilyLife Today. We\u2019ll hear some encouragement from Kelly for someone who has a spouse who may not be walking with the Lord in just a second.<\/p>\n<p>But first, Kelly Needham has written a book called Purposefooled: Why Chasing Your Dreams, Finding Your Calling, and Reaching for Greatness Will Never Be Enough. Wow! What a great title. This book\u2014we really believe in it, and it\u2019s going to be our gift to you when you give to the ministry of FamilyLife\u00ae. You can get your copy of Kelly\u2019s book, Purposefooled, right now by simply going online to FamilyLifeToday.com and clicking on the \u201cDonate Now\u201d button at the top of the page.<\/p>\n<p>Or give us a call with your donation at 800-358-6329; again, that number is 800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d And feel free to drop us a donation in the mail if you\u2019d like. Our address is FamilyLife, 100 Lake Hart Drive, Orlando, FL 32832.<\/p>\n<p>Alright! Now, let\u2019s hear more encouragement from Kelly for someone who has a spouse who may not be walking with the Lord.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: We\u2019d be remiss\u2014I know we\u2019re at the end, but for a spouse who doesn\u2019t have somebody, like a husband or a wife, who\u2019s even willing to talk about spiritual things; or maybe they\u2019re a believer, but they\u2019re just not there. How would you encourage them?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Don\u2019t underestimate your prayer life for them. Do not underestimate what God is doing in your praying. Especially in marriage\u2014I mean, we all know it, we\u2019re tempted to nag people to death to get them to change. [Laughter] That\u2019s just such a strong temptation in marriage. That just does not\u2014what you need is God to come alive to them.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Nag God about their spouse!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right! He does tell us to do that. But don\u2019t underestimate the power of prayer, and consistent nagging prayer, of God to do the transforming work that you would like to see happen.<\/p>\n<p>I think that\u2019s even true for your own heart. I thought about what you were saying earlier, about moms getting in the Word. There may be moms listening, saying, \u201cI have zero hunger for God. I just want to sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Or \u201cI just want to get away from everybody.\u201d [Laughter] But if you have any part of you that hears that and thinks, \u201cI would love to have a hunger for God,\u201d well, start there! Pray for a hunger; just an occasion when you are in the car, [say], \u201cGod, I feel no hunger\/appetite for You at all. Would You change that in me?\u201d Just start asking for it. He will.<\/p>\n<p>Start honestly where you are. Those prayers really are effective\u2014maybe not in the hour that we pray them; but they will bear fruit, especially as we keep bugging God. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s good. Thanks, you guys.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That was awesome.<\/p>\n<p>Shelby: Now, coming up next week, Chad and Emily Van Dixhoorn are going to be here with the Wilsons as they discuss grace, forgiveness, and practical ways to live out a Christ-centered union. Really looking forward to that next week.<\/p>\n<p>On behalf of Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Shelby Abbott. We will see you back next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today.<\/p>\n<p>FamilyLife Today is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife, a Cru\u00ae Ministry.<\/p>\n<p>Helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.<\/p>\n<p>We are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs? Copyright \u00a9 2024 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.<\/p>\n<p>www.FamilyLife<\/p>\n"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2024-07-26.pdf"],"_edit_lock":["1749590453:47000"],"_edit_last":["47000"],"theme_header_position":["Sticky"],"post_header_is_sticky":["default"],"is_header_overlay":["0"],"episode_type":["audio"],"date_recorded":["2024-07-26 08:00:00"],"enclosure":["https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/56a10294-6445-40f2-a5e4-b1a8011480db\/audio.mp3"],"_seopress_redirections_type":["301"],"_seopress_redirections_logged_status":["both"],"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":[""],"_g_feedback_shortcode_b828ea9d82589ba1d94ed8a8c4990ec226ac1a8a":["\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Name\" type=\"name\"  required=\"true\" \/]\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Email\" type=\"email\" required=\"true\" \/]\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Website\" type=\"url\" \/]\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Message\" type=\"textarea\" \/]"],"_g_feedback_shortcode_atts_b828ea9d82589ba1d94ed8a8c4990ec226ac1a8a":["a:17:{s:2:\"to\";s:29:\"margaret.coyle@familylife.com\";s:7:\"subject\";s:94:\"[FamilyLife - A Cru Ministry] Feel Invisible? 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feel invisible? Kelly and Jimmy Needham offer hope and encouragement for overcoming insecurity and living a purposeful life.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"<ul>\n<li>Connect with Kelly &amp; Jimmy Needham and catch more of their thoughts at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jimmyandkelly.com\/\">jimmyandkelly.com<\/a>. You can also find Kelly's book, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jimmyandkelly.com\/friendish\">Friendish<\/a>, there as well as other resources. Find Jimmy on social media \"<a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/jimmyneedham\/\">@jimmyneedham<\/a>\" and Kelly \"<a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/kellyneedham\/\">@kellyneedham<\/a>\".<\/li>\n<li>Wanna hear more episodes by Kelly Needham, <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/guest\/kelly-needham\/\">listen here<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>This week, for a donation of any size, we'll send you <a href=\"https:\/\/donate.familylife.com\/july-2024\/purposefooled\/?cru_source=FLTD24&amp;cru_medium=Icare&amp;cru_campaign=July2024\">Purposefooled: Why Chasing Your Dreams, Finding Your Calling<\/a>, as our way of saying a huge \"\"Thank you!\"\" for partnering with us toward stronger families around the world.<\/li>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2024-07-26.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>FamilyLife Today\u00ae National Radio Version (time edited) Transcript<\/p>\n<p>References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete.<\/p>\n<p>Feel Invisible? Overcoming Insecurity<\/p>\n<p>Guests:Kelly and Jimmy Needham<\/p>\n<p>From the series:Purposefooled (Day 2 of 2)<\/p>\n<p>Air date:July 26, 2024<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I, regularly, will have moments where I am in the house. A thing has happened with a kid, and it\u2019s like, \u201cAlright, I have to pause my whole day now to address this issue.\u201d I am in the hallway to try to make it a private moment with this child, so the other ones are somewhere else. Sometimes, I\u2019ll use my imagination in that moment, and say, \u201cJesus, help me do this well, because I don\u2019t know the fruit of this moment or its impact.\u201d I\u2019ll imagine it: \u201cHow many lives will be impacted by this child in their adulthood because we handled this conversation well?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Shelby: Welcome to FamilyLife Today, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I\u2019m Shelby Abbott, and your hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson. You can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: This is FamilyLife Today!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: So, one of the things I\u2019m still embarrassed about in our\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014is this confession time?!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I guess it sort of is.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I think our listeners have maybe heard me say this; maybe one time, because I\u2019m embarrassed, so I don\u2019t say it very often; but when we were first married, first year at the University of Nebraska as the chaplain for the Nebraska Corn Huskers sports teams, I would be introduced: \u201cHey, this is Dave Wilson. He\u2019s with Athletes in Action\u00ae, and he\u2019s the chaplain of our team.\u201d Previously, I was always introduced: \u201cDave Wilson\u2019s the quarterback of the football team. He\u2019s been All-Conference; he was all-American,\u201d and always had this thing.<\/p>\n<p>Actually, one day, I came home [Laughter]\u2014I\u2019m so embarrassed to say this\u2014after months of this, and I said to Ann, \u201cListen, nobody here knows that I was like something a year ago.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I think his words were like: \u201cThese people think I\u2019m a loser.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes! [Laughter] And so, what I said to her (and I can\u2019t believe I said this; talk about insecurity): \"I can\u2019t say, \u2018Hey! Last year, or the last four years, I was on a full scholarship\u2026\u2019 I was something! So, when I\u2019m introduced, could you just drop it in?\u201d [Laughter] I literally asked her to let people know I\u2019m really somebody.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Would you mind making me look awesome? [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Dave: How embarrassing!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I did it. I actually did it.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, you did it. That\u2019s even worse, that you actually did it. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019ve got Kelly and Jimmy Needham talking about purpose and calling and identity. We started a conversation yesterday. If you didn\u2019t hear that, go back and listen to yesterday, because we\u2019re going to follow up on that.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: With her book (Kelly\u2019s book), Purposefooled.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, Purposefooled. Again, welcome back.<\/p>\n<p>When you hear that story, are you just like, \u201cYou\u2019ve got to be kidding me?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Did you think, \u201closer,\u201d too?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: No!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Are you kidding? [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Hold on.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: What a loser.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Can we have confession number two on the Needham side? I\u2019ll start.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Ohh!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Let\u2019s go!<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: [In] those early years of touring\u2014which, if you heard yesterday\u2019s program, you\u2019ll remember this\u2014I was very insecure in the touring life with you. I would pull you aside and say, \u201cJimmy, you have to tell them you\u2019re married and that your wife is here. You have to let your audience know, because people don\u2019t know who I am. I\u2019m over at your merch table.\u201d I was kind of like: \u201cMake a big deal of me!\u201d [Laughter] That\u2019s pretty much what I said\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014I hope you did.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014on more than one occasion.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I did! Yes, that was easy for me to say.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: You\u2019ll sell more merch anyway.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, that\u2019s right. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: So, I totally feel you there [Dave].<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Alright, Jimmy, what\u2019s your confession?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, I\u2019m trying to think of a day when I\u2019m not having those feelings. [Laughter] I remember one time, I\u2019m driving to a show with my band. This is like a white van.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: A white 15-passanger van?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, that\u2019s right. I\u2019ve got my drummer driving; I\u2019m lying in the back row. [Laughter] We\u2019re going to some town that nobody has ever heard of. I just got word that one of my peers, who was a friend of mine, had his face plastered up in Times Square; his song\u2019s number one. All of that\u2019s happening, and I\u2019m seething.<\/p>\n<p>God brings to mind John 21. It\u2019s the moment where Jesus is resurrected. He has returned; He\u2019s with His disciples on the beach; He\u2019s talking with Peter. \u201cJesus says to Peter: \u2018I tell you the truth, when you were young, you used to dress yourself, go wherever you wanted; when you\u2019re older, someone else is going to dress you, stretch you out, lead you to where you do not want to go.\u2019 He said this to indicate by which kind of death Peter would glorify God.\u201d And then, He says, \u201cFollow Me.\u201d [John 21:18-19]<\/p>\n<p>That phrase struck me. I was so confronted with my own sin: \u201cIt might be the death of my career that brings glory to God more than the success of it,\u201d and \u201cDo I want God\u2019s fame more than my fame?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Oh, there it is.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u201cAm I equally as happy when my buddy goes number one with a single that\u2019s boasting about Jesus, and my song is getting no radio traction? Am I equally as happy if it means that God is somehow glorified in both?\u201d And my answer is: \u201cNo.\u201d I\u2019m not equally happy. I would sure like to be on Times Square.<\/p>\n<p>That was the big turning point for me, realizing, \u201cOh, my identity\u2014my sense of worth\u2014is way too tied to my accomplishments. I am way less impressed with the fame of Jesus; I am way more impressed with the fame of Jimmy.\u201d That\u2019s a big problem! God, for years after that, was working on me to work a lot of that out of me.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: We\u2019re facing that continually. When we started speaking for the Weekend to Remember\u00ae with FamilyLife\u00ae, at the first conference I ever did, a woman came up to me and said, \u201cI am so disappointed you are our speaker.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Oh! Wow!<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I said, \u201cI am, too! [Laughter] What could you possibly learn from me?!\u201d I remember going back to the room, and getting on my knees before Jesus, and I said, \u201cI have no business\u201d (especially, when somebody points it out) \u201cLord, I can\u2019t even do this.\u201d There\u2019s this other part of it, where: \u201cI\u2019m nothing. I\u2019m nobody. I have nothing to be able to give.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That was when I was younger.<\/p>\n<p>Now, we\u2019re getting older. Now, it\u2019s like, \u201cYes, you\u2019re too old to be relatable to what\u2019s going on.\u201d [Laughter] So, we\u2019re faced with both ends of it: \u201cWill I have a voice now that I\u2019m older? Did I have a voice when I was younger?\u201d and \u201cDoes that even matter?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: He intends to make us fruitful. He intends to bear fruit from our lives. He really does. That is a promise.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That is an expectation for all who are in Christ, that they would bear fruit, which means impact.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: As long as we have breath, right?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right, which means it\u2019s not associated with what we\u2019re doing, with how relevant we are, with what we have to contribute, with our skillset or lack of skillset.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It actually only has to do with our connection to the Vine. As long as we are connected to Him, we can bear fruit. [John 15]<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Ooh, let\u2019s talk about that abiding. What does that look like, as we\u2019re talking about purpose?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes. When I think about that passage, John 15, that\u2019s really the classic place that we would go to for Jesus talking about that, He says, \u201cApart from Me you can do nothing.\u201d That was really, I think, my first lesson in what makes my life purposeful and meaningful: \u201cApart from Me, you can do nothing.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>My thought\u2014I remember studying that passage\u2014was: \u201cWow! Then, Jesus, there\u2019s a whole lot of really effective, impressive-looking nothing in the world.\u201d [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>There is!<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u201cThere are whole things that look like they\u2019re really changing things, that You would say, \u2018If they\u2019re not connected to Me, they are nothing.\u2019 In the final analysis, it will be blown away.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s a deep thought, right there.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Isn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s really helped me, though, because it\u2019s really tempting to look around on social media, or whatever else we\u2019re doing, and to see stuff happening and assess it as: \u201cImportant,\u201d \u201cNoteworthy,\u201d \u201cEffective.\u201d And then to look at your own life that looks very mundane and normal, and say, \u201cWell, this doesn\u2019t compare to that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s like: \u201cWell, let me change my perspective\u2014let me take off the glasses I have on and put on a different pair\u2014and say, \u2018Jesus, how would You see it?\u2019\u201d He says, \u201cApart from Me you can do nothing.\u201d \u201cWell, okay then.\u201d [Laughter] That also means: \u201cWith Me, you can do everything.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I remember realizing, in an early season of motherhood: \u201cAlright! Abiding with Jesus is the most important thing that I can do to make my life effective. If I do that, He promises fruit will come. He says, \u2018Anyone who abides in Me will bear much fruit\u2019.\u201d [John 15:5] It\u2019s a promise! I don\u2019t have to worry about the fruit. I don\u2019t have to work hard to make the fruit come. I just have to stick close to Him; and His promise and guarantee is, it will be fruitful.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: What does that look like? I\u2019m thinking about your life, Kelly, as a young mom.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: You have five kids now. You continually make Jesus a priority to abide with Him.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I think that finding time to connect with Jesus every day\u2014I\u2019ve realized\u2014is paramount and important. It doesn\u2019t matter so much if it\u2019s the beginning of the day. I mean, that obviously feels like the ideal Christian standard, right? \u201cStart your day with Jesus.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I had to find different ways to find connection with Jesus, even if it was just on the drive to school with kids, or on a walk, or listening to my Bible, or finding ways to pray. It was less important to me how that looked than that I had a way to connect with Him and share where I was really at with the Lord and get some kind of intake from His Word and from the community that I\u2019m in. If my purpose is a Person\u2014if my purpose is Jesus, then there\u2019s nothing else more important in my day. That means if my laundry doesn\u2019t get done, and dinner doesn\u2019t get made the way I wanted to, and if we have snacks for lunch, not sandwiches, you know what? It\u2019s okay! [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Ann: So, what is the fruit that has come from that?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I don\u2019t exactly know.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Ask her husband.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I have five kids now who are getting to witness, every day, a woman who is saying, \u201cJesus is the most important Person.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Wow.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2014listen, you guys are still young enough\u2014that\u2019s the greatest gift you\u2019re giving your kids\u2014the greatest one\u2014that they see that Jesus is your everything.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, because you can say it, and you can give them the orders\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014yes\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u2014if they don\u2019t see you treasuring, delighting, enjoying, it\u2019s like, \u201cI don\u2019t buy it!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: And it feels messy at the time, doesn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It is very messy.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I remember taking the kids to school; they\u2019re in the back. I got into a habit when our kids were born that, when I put them in a car seat, I would just get in the car\u2019s driver seat, and I would start praying. Because you have to bring Jesus into every minute of the day.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy and Kelly: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: And I wanted them to know that we pray without ceasing through everything. I\u2019m talking to Him all day long. They hear the messy; they hear the mundane; but they also hear the: \u201cGod! Look at this glorious day! Look at these leaves! You\u2019re amazing!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: They don\u2019t even know what fruit is, but they\u2019re watching you have a vibrant relationship with Jesus.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s what you\u2019re showing them.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I think we want to see the effect and the return of our efforts. In some of these seasons, we have to use our imagination.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: What\u2019s that mean?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I, regularly, will have moments where I am in the house; a thing has happened with a kid, and it\u2019s like, \u201cAlright, I have to pause my whole day now to address this issue.\u201d I am in the hallway to try to make it a private moment with this child, so the other ones are somewhere else. And there are some times when Jimmy is at church, preaching, or prepping to, or on the road. There are crowds in my visual for him, right? And here I am with this one child.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes, I\u2019ll use my imagination in that moment, and say, \u201cJesus, help me do this well, because I don\u2019t know the fruit of this moment or its impact.\u201d I\u2019ll imagine it: \u201cHow many lives will be impacted by this child in their adulthood because we handled this conversation well? Help me, Jesus, to see the crowd of people behind this moment.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Aww, that\u2019s so good!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, that\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It\u2019s like, I need that. We are hungry for that meaning, that purpose. When we see it, visually, in crowds, and platforms, and stages, that\u2019s why we run there. But I think Jesus has that vision for us in the Scriptures. We just have to carry it into these moments of our day and use our imagination to remember.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: You guys, address the person who is listening that maybe feels like, \u201cMan, I did that with my kids, and now, this child is older, and they\u2019re doing nothing. They\u2019ve walked away from the church. I\u2019m not seeing the faith they proclaimed when they were younger.\u201d How would you encourage them?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: If you don\u2019t have a vision of the sovereignty of God, and an appreciation for the Lord doing ten thousand things that we can\u2019t see in a moment, it really would be crippling and discouraging to experience that. I agree with any mom or dad who has a wayward son or daughter. That would be so hard! At the same time, I am comforted by the fact that, as long as they are breathing, the game isn\u2019t over.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Who knows what the Lord is doing?<\/p>\n<p>As a pastor now, I\u2019m privy to a thousand wonderful stories of: \u201cIt didn\u2019t happen when I thought it would, but later in life, my daughter who abandoned Jesus was convicted of her sin and came back to Christ.\u201d This just happened: a gal from our church ran away from the Lord, [but] got baptized in our church just recently\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014wow.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u2014came back to the Lord.<\/p>\n<p>The day before that happens, you still feel like all hope\u2019s lost.<\/p>\n<p>Dave and Ann: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: It\u2019s the day before that happens, and it\u2019s like, \u201cWho knows what our God is up to?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: And then, maybe just the other thing I\u2019d add is, I want everybody to come to know Jesus, but my chief goal in life is not to see results in my decisions as a parent, as a pastor, or as a song writer. My chief goal in life is to glorify the Lord and enjoy Him forever.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: And if that is the aim, then the whole world around me can go bonkers, and the main thing is still getting accomplished. My God is being made much of in my heart and in my life. I don\u2019t know if that feels too reductionistic, but for me, it\u2019s like: \u201cThat can be done no matter how my kid responds to my disciplining, or my parenting, or my gospel presentation, or whatever.\u201d God can still be exalted.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: And He promises that, if you keep abiding with Him, it will bear fruit. It will!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It is a will statement in John 15. I take a lot of comfort in that. So, even if you don\u2019t see the fruit you\u2019re wanting, it doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s not bearing fruit; or maybe something\u2019s growing underground you can\u2019t see yet.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes, that\u2019s good.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: You really do have to entrust that labor to God; that\u2019s His labor. Our labor is to abide with Him; His labor is to bear the fruit. That\u2019s hard. We want to be more in control of it than that. We\u2019re in a culture that tells us we can be more in control of the effects of our life than that.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: That\u2019s right. Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I think, too, that\u2019s why, for me, I have to be in the Word every day.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I have to be with Him every day, because when you\u2019re reminded of the greatness, the vastness, the power, the love, the grace\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014yes, yes\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014it allows you to take a breath to say: \u201cYou love him. You love her. You love me, and I can trust You.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: And like you said, you seize those sacred moments in the dark hallway, when your husband might be off, and you\u2019re alone, and you\u2019re thinking, \u201cThis is so insignificant.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: It\u2019s a holy moment.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It is a holy moment.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: It is. I don\u2019t know if it\u2019s appropriate here, but I remember, years ago in Little Rock, we interviewed Chip Ingram.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I was going to say that, Dave.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: He told the story about his son, Jason, who walked away from the Lord. They prayed and prayed, and his son just walked away. They raised him the right way, and\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014he said, \u201cI\u2019m out. I\u2019m gone.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: He comes back\u2014you probably know him; he\u2019s written some of the best songs\u2014Lauren Daigle\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014You Say.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014\u201cYou say I am loved.\u201d That\u2019s Jason Ingram\u2019s song.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I\u2019ve written with him many times, yes. I love Jason.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: So, you know him better.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, love Jason.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Chip said when he asked his son, \u201cWhy did you come back?\u201d He said, \u201cEvery day I saw you sit on the couch with your Bible open.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: He said, \u201cI can\u2019t deny your faith.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u201cI couldn\u2019t get that out of my head. He\u2019s real. I watched my parents.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy and Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Again, we don\u2019t live it perfectly, but they\u2019re watching. Those little sacred moments that we think are insignificant could turn into the life-changing moment that your son or daughter says, \u201cIt\u2019s real.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: And it\u2019s interesting that his attention is drawn back to his dad\u2019s personal clinging to Jesus.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, yes; abiding.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Yes!<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Not what he\u2019s trying to disciple into him as much; not all the lectures, right?<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: But \u201cYou [Chip], personally, were very attached emotionally, relationally, to a Person I couldn\u2019t see.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s always the question for me: \u201cIs that happening? Am I walking that out?\u201d Sometimes, as a mom\u2014I don\u2019t know if anyone else, any other moms feel this\u2014it almost, sometimes, felt like a luxury to have extended time with Jesus. That sounds silly, maybe, but it was like: \u201cNo, I need\u201d\u2014it feels very noble\u2014\u201cI need to move the laundry,\u201d \u201cI need to do this for my child,\u201d \u201c\u2026do that for my child.\u201d It feels too luxurious to have an hour of time to sit with God. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>No, that\u2019s your command! That\u2019s your command: Number One. It might not be an hour, but any time\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014but you can have nuggets of time.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014you do sit down. I think, as a mom, sometimes, who has many kids, it feels wrong, in the middle of a busy day, to sit.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014or even selfish.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: It can feel selfish. I hear that from other moms, as well. \u201cNo! The Lord has told you: \u2018This is your first and greatest command.\u2019\u201d And it is enjoyable to you; it should be. It is restful for you; it\u2019s meant to be. So, receive it without guilt, knowing that this is actually Step Number One to even enable you to love your neighbor as yourself (and those little children are your first neighbors). You can\u2019t do that well without the first part.<\/p>\n<p>That really freed me to then say, \u201cOkay, I can spend time doing this even if my kitchen is a mess still. That\u2019s okay.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: We all know, we do our priorities. If it\u2019s a priority\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014we do; that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014you know moms who have five kids or six kids, and somehow, they work out\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014that\u2019s right!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u2014because their body\u2014they say, \u201cI\u2019ve got to do this.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes, absolutely.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I\u2019ve done it. My body\u2019s more important than my spiritual life. I find a way to get an hour workout in, but I didn\u2019t spend any [time with Jesus]. If my purpose is a Person, the Person has to be a priority.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Let me ask you this: how does this priority of abiding in Christ\u2014how do you do it together as a couple? Talk marriage. Because you\u2019ve got a full life, and craziness going on in your home. Is there an overlap, together, as you do this?<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: We just try to be really vocal with each other about what is going on in our internal lives a lot. We get the kids down, and we\u2019re probably talking for an hour after that\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014yes, really nice.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u2014just everything from what our day\u2019s like to, \u201cI read this thing, and it made me feel\u2026I realized, \u2018Oh, I\u2019m putting too much hope in what this person thinks about me\u2019,\u2019\u2019 or whatever.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I think what you\u2019re even saying is that we\u2019ve made each other\u2019s soul and relationship with God a priority.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: I care very deeply that you\u2019re healthy and your walk with Jesus is healthy. And you care very much about that for me and have often said, \u201cDo you need to get out?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s so sweet.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u201cDo you need to get out and have some time alone, away from the house?\u201d I\u2019ve said the same thing to you. Even more than our marriage sometimes, it\u2019s like, \u201cYou need to be healthy with Jesus, and I need to be healthy with Jesus first! Then we can work on us.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Usually, if we do the first part well, we don\u2019t have to do much work on us. It\u2019s very natural; there\u2019s an overflow there.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: I\u2019ll tell you what it hasn\u2019t looked like\u2014and this is, sometimes, jarring to some believers\u2014it does not look like us poring over the Word in a Bible study together every day. It does not look so much like that. I think there\u2019s a ton of value in that; but for us, we\u2019re able to be spiritually vibrant with each other, with the Lord, without some of the more formal trappings.<\/p>\n<p>When I was 19, and I was asking for marriage advice from people\u2014I remember, it was like a month before I was getting married. I was leading worship for a men\u2019s retreat. The speaker there was a retired Dallas Seminary professor, a savant man of God in his 80s. He didn\u2019t even preach from notes. I asked him marriage advice: \u201cHow do you spiritually lead your wife and all that?\u201d He said, \u201cWell, early on in our marriage, I taught my wife biblical Greek and Hebrew, and we studied the Scriptures in the original languages.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: What?!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Are you kidding me?!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That was his advice to me.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: I mean, that\u2019s what we did. [Laughter] That\u2019s what I do, honey.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, I\u2019m sure that\u2019s what you guys do.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Oh, yes!<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: For us, it\u2019s not what we ended up doing.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: We added a little Aramaic in there, too. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: But I do think there is some sort of aspiration in biblically-minded Christians: \u201cOh, that\u2019s the\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u2014\u201dThat\u2019s the pinnacle.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: \u201cThat\u2019s the pinnacle,\u201d maybe, for them.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: It took me a while to say, \u201cOkay, I can\u2019t live this man\u2019s life in my marriage. I just need to be praying for her; be concerned for her spiritual vibrancy.\u201d That may look different, but letting myself off the hook with some of the things [for which] there\u2019s no verse that says: \u201cDo that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: It just says that I need to lead and shepherd my wife well; love her, sacrificially. But it does not say, \u2018Teach her biblical Hebrew.\u2019\u201d [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: \u2014\u201cDo a Bible study together every morning at 5 am.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann: But you\u2019ve gotten yourselves into a rhythm.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes, that\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: When the kids are in bed, you catch up with each other: \u201cWhat\u2019s going on with your heart? What\u2019s going on with your spiritual life?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: I think those are really good questions.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes. I know, when I heard you say that\u2014Ann has said to me for 40-plus years now: \u201cI just want to talk about God together.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: \u201cWhat\u2019s going on? What are you hearing?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: \u201cI\u2019m walking with Him. I was in the Word today.\u201d It\u2019s easy for me not to share that. It\u2019s like, \u201cNo, no, no. That\u2019s important. I\u2019m going to tell her.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: And there\u2019s something that happens in that conversation.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: That\u2019s right.<\/p>\n<p>Dave: A lot of couples don\u2019t even do that.<\/p>\n<p>Shelby: I\u2019m Shelby Abbott; and you\u2019ve been listening to Dave and Ann Wilson with Jimmy and Kelly Needham on FamilyLife Today. We\u2019ll hear some encouragement from Kelly for someone who has a spouse who may not be walking with the Lord in just a second.<\/p>\n<p>But first, Kelly Needham has written a book called Purposefooled: Why Chasing Your Dreams, Finding Your Calling, and Reaching for Greatness Will Never Be Enough. Wow! What a great title. This book\u2014we really believe in it, and it\u2019s going to be our gift to you when you give to the ministry of FamilyLife\u00ae. You can get your copy of Kelly\u2019s book, Purposefooled, right now by simply going online to FamilyLifeToday.com and clicking on the \u201cDonate Now\u201d button at the top of the page.<\/p>\n<p>Or give us a call with your donation at 800-358-6329; again, that number is 800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d And feel free to drop us a donation in the mail if you\u2019d like. Our address is FamilyLife, 100 Lake Hart Drive, Orlando, FL 32832.<\/p>\n<p>Alright! Now, let\u2019s hear more encouragement from Kelly for someone who has a spouse who may not be walking with the Lord.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: We\u2019d be remiss\u2014I know we\u2019re at the end, but for a spouse who doesn\u2019t have somebody, like a husband or a wife, who\u2019s even willing to talk about spiritual things; or maybe they\u2019re a believer, but they\u2019re just not there. How would you encourage them?<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Don\u2019t underestimate your prayer life for them. Do not underestimate what God is doing in your praying. Especially in marriage\u2014I mean, we all know it, we\u2019re tempted to nag people to death to get them to change. [Laughter] That\u2019s just such a strong temptation in marriage. That just does not\u2014what you need is God to come alive to them.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: Nag God about their spouse!<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: That\u2019s right! He does tell us to do that. But don\u2019t underestimate the power of prayer, and consistent nagging prayer, of God to do the transforming work that you would like to see happen.<\/p>\n<p>I think that\u2019s even true for your own heart. I thought about what you were saying earlier, about moms getting in the Word. There may be moms listening, saying, \u201cI have zero hunger for God. I just want to sleep.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave: Yes, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Kelly: Or \u201cI just want to get away from everybody.\u201d [Laughter] But if you have any part of you that hears that and thinks, \u201cI would love to have a hunger for God,\u201d well, start there! Pray for a hunger; just an occasion when you are in the car, [say], \u201cGod, I feel no hunger\/appetite for You at all. Would You change that in me?\u201d Just start asking for it. He will.<\/p>\n<p>Start honestly where you are. Those prayers really are effective\u2014maybe not in the hour that we pray them; but they will bear fruit, especially as we keep bugging God. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That\u2019s good. Thanks, you guys.<\/p>\n<p>Jimmy: Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann: That was awesome.<\/p>\n<p>Shelby: Now, coming up next week, Chad and Emily Van Dixhoorn are going to be here with the Wilsons as they discuss grace, forgiveness, and practical ways to live out a Christ-centered union. Really looking forward to that next week.<\/p>\n<p>On behalf of Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Shelby Abbott. We will see you back next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today.<\/p>\n<p>FamilyLife Today is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife, a Cru\u00ae Ministry.<\/p>\n<p>Helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.<\/p>\n<p>We are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs? Copyright \u00a9 2024 FamilyLife. 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